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Is this a direct trigger to a trauma event? It's a very broad trigger and most triggers are fairly specific. One of my triggers is the smells associated with outhouses or portable toilets. But the smell has to accompanied with being outside and also in a confined space.

I have dreams like this. I do yell sometimes and wake myself up from the sound of it. Most of my dreams are about somehow failing all the good in my life. I caused an accident or I couldn't warn them of danger. It plays on my vulnerabilities of not being good enough or once again I screwed...

I might have to disagree with the overlooking the small stuff. I'm a firm believer in communicating everything, good, bad, little, big, and everything in between. If something doesn't feel right, discuss it right then. Same goes the other way, if it feels really good, say that too.

I would ignore. He's a goof. If I looked at something else than the glass, there would be no clinking and maybe some shattering and lots of swearing.

I've written this three times. Why can't I say this right? Bear with me. Your wife now is the same exact person as who you knew before you knew the specifics of her rape. She is the same. Why question the person you already know? her quirks and differences is a part of her. It doesn't matter the...

Good for you Hooper! I do agree with everyone else although I see how this hurts you because it hurts (or had..maybe?) your wife. It's obvious you love your wife. I'm trying to put your situation in my situation. My memories popped up well after we were married, but there wasn't a chance in hell...

It can be both, don't you think?

When I first found out, I was somewhat relieved that I wasn't really going all nuts. I really wanted more of a physical reason since what I was feeling was mostly physical. Of course all physical sensations have to go through the brain first to be interpreted. I'm like Joeylittle. I had...

Electrical humming/zapping sounds. Any child in physical pain, especially if they are trying very hard to toughen up. Any kind of yelp. It could be a dog, another animal, or human. Warm air blowing by my ear. Lastly, anything that is sudden and loud: gun, toaster, explosives. (I have a new...

Hot yoga has totally screwed up my sleep patterns. I can't get to sleep until near five in the morning even though I'm so tired. I've tried yoga earlier in the day but I don't have enough sugar, salt, and water in my system for it. I'm still trying to find that balance. During the summer months...

How did it go?

This thread has been on my mind. I said I was going to donate and would like to bring this particular fundraiser to a close. I counted 26 drawings total. 104.00 usd will be donated. Thank you all that have participated! @Sammyiam 4.00. @The One Who Knocks 4.00. @macbeth 20.00. @cherryblossom...

My parents talk about the tornados of '74. It's ingrained in everyone's memory: where were you during the tornado? Like every child that grew up in the Midwest, especially on a farm (farmers are obsessed with weather), I had nightmares about tornados. As many as 12 of them coming after me and my...

You are doing great. Taking rests when you need them is good insight. What you've written so far is familiar, unfortunately. I hope you continue to write. Congratulations on the beginning of your diary. Love your title.

Those are bad questions like @scout86 said. Even if you changed your life drastically, there will still be bad questions. 1. Why do you work so hard? Relax, have fun. You have the rest of your life to work. 2) how's married life? Is it all it's cracked up to be? 3) why have so many kids...

Don't blame you anon. I would switch to 12hr and only take in the mornings. I did that for five years.

Give it at least a month. The nasty side effects should go away in a week. I hope it works for you.

I remember, when I was four or so, maybe three, I was out with my sister to the "river". I think it was like a culvert...a dirty water river with junk in it. I was being risky and staying too close to the edge. I remember falling in and seeing the sun through the surface of the water. As I kick...

This is what I was talking about having "weird emotions". I was euphoric and then I came crashing down. I wish I had just a little bit of the euphoria. It felt nice. All the side effects were gone in a week except for the heat intolerance. I have to be careful with that one. I love hot yoga and...

I have been on Wellbutrin for ten years at least. I have done the 12 hr 150mg all the way to (what I'm currently taking), 24hr 450mg. I have also weaned off several times. It works to a certain degree for me. When it comes to the daily type issues that cause depression and self-blame, this...

I love show binges. Can't beat the instant gratification of watching the next episode.

Hubs loves this show. I watched a few episodes. It is so uncomfortable for me and I can't put my finger on why.

Hey @ghotiff . The longer I'm at the forum, the more I realize how much I have in common with you. My oldest girl has anxiety. She was 1.5-3 years old when I was going through the worst part of my PTSD. I was one of the non-functioning type of sufferer. I gathered all my energy into therapy...

Hi @bebraver . I'm another with "forgotten" memories of abuse until I was in my mid twenties. Welcome to the forum.

I hear myself in your words. Big upheavals like that take time to heal. It brings to bright focus how vulnerable our armor is. :hug:s