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Sorry if this is posted in the wrong place, I wasn't sure where to put it. Before I was diagnosed with PTSD a few years back I went though a denial stage. Denying what had happened in my past and that all the abuse did not happen. That's when good old PTSD struck me with a vengeance because I...

I don't even know where to start.. I have been avoiding the forum (I hope you all can forgive me) because I have been spiraling down hill. Things were getting bad and I felt I couldn't handle anything. I didn't want to get out of bed, shower, eat etc let alone come on here because It just felt...

I have been prescribed Citalopram 20mg and was wondering if anyone on here has/is taking this medication? I'm apprehensive about beginning this medication as I have been told by my doctor it is addictive and there seem to be many side effects (which I read on the leaflet). If anyone could...

I'm at a point where I need to make a decision about my future, whether to go back home after my degree and get a job in accountancy (which I find too stressful) or to go down the teaching root. I'm working on my application but keep pancaking a lot about it, I don't know if I'd make a good...

I used to self- harm and have stopped for 4 months but as the days go on im finding it harder and harder to fight the urge. Im very much on the fence tonight and I'm struggling a lot. I feel so lonely and the pain is so much. I have a need to just do it....just so that I can feel better :( I...

I feel like such a waste of space and time. My wedding is in one week, yet I'm having SI?!! Is this normal?! It should be the happiest time of my life yet, I don't feel that way :( I hate that I can't feel happy. There is something wrong with me and I don't deserve him or anything at all. Why...

I'm starting exposure therapy next week and don't know what to expect. I'm terrified that it will shatter the progress I have made this year and that it will make my symptoms worse. I don't want to bring all these memories to the surface but my therapist has told me that is necessary for...

So I've noticed I am extremely reserved lately. I hold back on everything and have found that I now don't trust anyone. I don't know how I got here. I guess it allows me to 'not feel as much pain' if someone where to hurt me or betray me. No one can if I don't open up I guess? Does anyone else...

Deep ocean below Deep flowing waters, splash upon the shores, Of a thousand possibilities, That lie within the sea floor. It's surface so reflective, Entwining the beauty of the sky, With all the millions of stars, Above our heads at night. It's waters so cold, Ever changing tides...

I've been on melatonin 10mg to help me sleep especially for when I have y phases of night terrors/nightmares. The problem is that it's not working anymore. I keep having night terrors and its fighting the effects of melatonin so I can't sleep. Has anyone had this occur to them? I'm desperate to...

Last weekend I decided to go to the cinema with a few friends I have recently made. Therapy had been going well and I was slowly moving out of the bubble I had created. Beforehand I couldn't go tot the cinema as it scared me that I was stuck in a dark room with strangers. I went in with one of...

A huge weight is crushing me or atleast its how it feels. Everyday I drown a little more and its getting harder to surface. For every step I take foward, I fall 5 back. Its exhausting, frustrating and I just cant. Life is a struggle when you cant trust not even your parents and the only...

Feel completely alone, depressed and all I want to do is get into bed and cry. People don't understand me when I tell them just how sad I'm feeling. It makes me feel so much worse as it makes me feel like I'm just exaggerating how I'm feeling. I've tried discussing this with my doctor with no...

I haven't posted in a while but I'm in so much pain right now and have tried so many ways in which to try and cope but feel myself slipping. All my life I have been the one that people have considered "different" and "weird". No matter what I have done I have always been seen as the black sheep...

My friend has come to visit and I feel terrible. Im finding it difficult to pretend to he ok, when I know im not. My anxiety is really bad amd I feel so depressed. I love her to bits but its draining to put ona facade that Iim perfectly fine when im the complete opposite inside....

This week is tough. I approach a anniversary of abuse. This time every year until January, everything gets worse. The reminder of Christmas approaching everywhere does not help. This time of loving and bringing people together, was never the case for me growing up and Christmas turned into a...

To follow on from yesterday. Everything keeps getting worse :( today I saw my abuser and he was too close for comfort. Im freaked out and feel depressed. It has brought back many bad memories for me. :(

Im finding it so hard right now.This feeling of lonliness and never going to be happy feels like its consuming me! I look back at my past and see sadness and when I look to my future I see this too. I want to be happy! I cant be though, not matter how much I try! I cant cope, I cant when all I...

I dont know how to explain how I am feeling or what I am going through, I've never really been any good at describing what im feeling and have difficulty pin pointing emotions that I feel. Two days ago I went to see a therapist. She is now my new therapist as I haven't been to therapy in...

Hi was wondering if there are any survivors on this forum from Gibraltar? I think it would be good to know someone who is suffering from PTSD where I am from and be eachothers support systems. Also I am having a hard time with finding help where I am from, if anyone from Gib could please help...

I cant seem to control my anxiety. Work stress and horrible people calling those with mental illnesses crazy has me at a constant panic. I know I shouldnt listen to them but I cant stop myself from panacking! My heart is racing, my chest hurts, im finding it hard to breath and im feeling...

Sorry if this is posted in the wrong place, please feel free to move it. I' m having nightmares every night, every time I try to sleep, flashbacks practically every day. Crying all the time, crying when I finally get the courage to leave my house and in public (which is a huge deal for me...

Just wanted to let everyone know it is PTSD awareness day. :) To all my forum friends and to those I haven't spoken to but still consider part of my community here, STAY STRONG! We struggle so much everyday due to this but today I want you to all give yourselves credit for making it so far! We...

I actually just came up with this one day when I was very angry and upset at my parents for taking my childhood away from me. I had spent most my childhood trying to get away from my parents and other abusers, panicking about getting raped/molested/beaten etc That I never had fun like other...

I have no words to describe how I'm feeling. My world is just breaking apart. 3 days ago I attempted it. I lost all hope I once had. I'm still in a vast amount of pain and going through recovery. Its so difficult. I feel so alone in the world and I don't know how to pick myself up from this...