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Search results

  1. Q

    Supporter Seeking Understanding...

    Wrong post sorry!
  2. Q

    Childhood when did you start remembering?

    I relate completely. I had a feeling something happened. I would obsess over watching movies and shows about CSA. It was seeing the victims be heard. I always had weird shame and anxiety around s*x with my husband. One day at 38 I was laying in bef after and my body froze. I couldn't move. I...
  3. Q

    How does dissociation feel for you?

    For me its a number of things. Body freeze, where everything stops and I can't move is the worst. Then there is willful times, where i purposely decise to check out because im in a situation that is highly triggering. And then other times its like when in a movie they are showing the world...
  4. Q

    EMDR...Hard Target and really struggling

    Thank you. This is sort of the conclusion I came to yesterday as I felt my brain was going nuts. Writing down facts that I know to be true. Truths, feelings and beliefs that I do not question. I need to deal with those because they are tangible. The rest has to sit or ill loose my mind.
  5. Q

    EMDR...Hard Target and really struggling

    We went back to a hard target yesterday. Last time it left me disassociating etc. We took a break and worked on " smaller" targets and that helped. Now we are back on this one and I started off with pretty high stress about it. It's a target I have fragmented memories. I keep trying to put...
  6. Q

    Sexual Assault I think i was assaulted as a kid but cant remember

    I have been through something similar. I highly recommend reading or researching " The Body Keeps the Score". I always thought I might have be sexually abused and then oneday I started having body flashbacks. Horrible ones. But no real context. I'd avoided therapy but finally went to an EMDR...
  7. Q

    Adding Lexapro to Wellbutrin...nervous

    Thanks for sharing!! That's hopeful!
  8. Q

    Adding Lexapro to Wellbutrin...nervous

    I guess I'll see how it goes and then be honest I experience unwanted side effects. I hate trying new stuff lol
  9. Q

    Adding Lexapro to Wellbutrin...nervous

    So I'm supposed to start taking lexapro to ease anxiety with the wellbutrin I've been taking for a year now. The wellbutrin has helped my depression, energy levels and focus. I really like it and feel it's helped but I need help with my anxiety. I know wellbutrin is sometimes prescribed to...
  10. Q

    Sexual Assault Exploring Childhood Trauma in Therapy: Overcoming Memories

    I had a similar thoughts just yesterday. The flashbacks get more real and everything I remember about my younger life seems like a totally different life/person. It's like things keep coming and I'm reliving them and it's insane. How can it all be true AND I didn't remember it?? It's incredible
  11. Q

    It wont stop replaying..sorry so long

    Yes. It's funny how the brain works and sorts things out! Time often gives clarity. Trust the process
  12. Q

    It wont stop replaying..sorry so long

    It did end up coming for me. A totally different memory. I still can't fully believe it but I've learned to trust my brain and let it heal as it needs too. I believed it and now I'm starting to heal.
  13. Q

    Somatic Memories- there has to be an end to this. Anyone found it?

    A good therapist. EMDR has been doing wonders for me. I used to freeze up etc too. It's gotten better and better.
  14. Q

    Childhood Is it possible he sexually assaulted me and I don't remember?

    First off, trust your brain and your body. Maybe he did or maybe he didn't. But there is a reason your brain and body respond as they do. I've found, if you let it, the answers come with time. They may not be exactly what you think. I started therapy because of PTSD and I'm still learning my...
  15. Q

    Sufferer Healing from Childhood Trauma: Joining a Supportive Community

    Welcome! This forum has been very helpful for me! Reading others stories helped me realize that I wasn't crazy and helped me understand myself and my PTSD. I hope you find some help here too!
  16. Q

    Dealing With Doubt From Parts After Traumatic CSA Flashbacks

    This is incredibly common. I have struggled with doubting myself the entire time I've been in therapy. I knew my body and somatic flashbacks and my responses were real but I doubted my memories. Recently during EMDR the memory surfaced that explains all my flashbacks and part of me knows...
  17. Q

    EMDR bringing up memories..real?

    I'm newer abd still recognizing how my brain is working and processing all these things coming up. As i look back I am starting to see how my brain has been bringing stuff up and putting it together. Originally I thought my flashbacks related to something else and I struggled with knowing and...
  18. Q

    EMDR bringing up memories..real?

    That makes sense. The more I sit with this new memory, the more real it is. It's more like you said...always been there but couldn't access it. It's now shaken loose. I am beginning to see the person's face a little bit more as time goes on..it started as a shadowy figure in the dark. Now it's a...
  19. Q

    Is this a Part taking over, or a freeze response? Or?

    I freeze/ collapse too and sometimes can't talk for a long time after. My body won't move. Totally disconnected from my brain. The first time it happened it freaked me out. I learned over time to let it happen and to slowly talk myself out of it. Usually I start with my fingers and blinking my...
  20. Q

    Reached a new level of vulnerability with my T and I hate it.

    Thank you for the reassurance! Thank you! It's so helpful getting reassurance from people who are here/ been here before. Just when you think maybe things are improving..bam. Whole new level of sh*t pops up and you start hoping this is the end.
  21. Q

    Reached a new level of vulnerability with my T and I hate it.

    I had a very hard session yesterday and had to stop it. I could see that T was concerned and sympathized with how I felt. I was disassociating etc. But, part of the reason I had to stop was the level of discomfort I felt being that vulnerable and seeing her reaction. It made me feel so...
  22. Q

    EMDR bringing up memories..real?

    Thank you. I think this new one, if real, actually does sort out another that I always felt was not correct and possibly two memories my brain had linked but didn't actually belong together. This one would separate the two into clearer separate memories with different perpetrators which makes...
  23. Q

    EMDR bringing up memories..real?

    I know there are alot of posts about if memories can be trusted etc. Today I went in for an " emergency " session due to a devastating somatic/ body flashback last night. My T decided to do some EMDR with it. Working through , my mind suddenly jumped to something I know happened, but with an...
  24. Q

    Your own kids …

    I'm trying my best but I definitely see where I'm failing. I have a hard time with touch, even from my kids. I hate that I feel that way. I see how it affects them. I'm also always stressed and easily agitated. I'm working hard on it, and hoping it will get better. I can't relax and enjoy time...
  25. Q

    Gaslighting? Is this a form of it or something else.

    I so appreciate the encouragement! It's very hard to trust myself but I am working on it and your words are helpful 😊
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