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Sorry you are going through this. I really don't have experience on this but I am wondering what some of you would do in my case. When they go through such isolation and withdrawal it is so hard. My Vet that I have been dating for over 2 years said we should take a break tonight. He has become...
If he is hugging you and telling you he loves you to me those are 'words of encouragement'. Men have different 'love languages' and different ways of communicating that may not be exactly what we feel we need. Nevertheless they are still trying to encourage you or show you their love in the...
That is so important and it took me a while before it finally 'hit' me. I moved to a new town after my divorce and met my Vet by accident and then revolved my world around him. Then things started getting shaky at times between us. It finally hit me that I have no one else but him. So I have had...
This is tough because you have to figure out what to do for yourself but I can tell you how I have survived. But my relationship has lasted 2 years and we are not married, living together and only see each other 2 times a week. Sometimes I or both of us need that break in between. He is also an...
I am so sorry for you. I know this is so difficult to go through. I met my Vet 2 yrs ago (next week) after my divorce and felt I have really met the person that truly loves and cares for me. But it has been such a roller coaster ride. He is 15 yrs older than me. It started out great like he was...
I know how hard it is when you are being physically turned away and just want that closeness from your partner. I am sure I am much older than you and my bf is 15 yrs older than me. We first started dating he was so romantic and the affection was wonderful. But gradually he changed and...
Of course it's hard not to take it personally. But like a counselor told my sister who was having marital problems... A spouse will take it out on the one that is the 'safest'. She can't really pitch a fit in front of a friend and treat a friend like that and expect a friend to stay around but...
Yeah, Sweetpea you know how much I think you are a big help to everyone!! :)
Not taking things personally. I think that must be my biggest problem. He is worried about the fight he just had with his brother and they are not speaking and so many other things have gotten him off kilter. But I...
And I know 7 months may seem like a long time but it is not. Recovery from anything takes a long time. I divorced after 30 years of marriage and had to basically start my life over in a new city. The first year I was basically in shock functioning much like a robot just to get myself to work and...
I am not an expert by any means but I can only tell you from my experience. With my relationship I just have to 'go with the flow'. My boyfriend doesn't want to go out anymore for various reasons so I try not to talk about it anymore. You can't really push them into doing things or go places...
My guy is also a recovering Alcoholic of 30 yrs but the ptsd and what I have learned from this forum has explained a lot of his behavior. Our relationship too started off with a bang. Going out all the time, so much affection and romance. I had been through a divorce and I knew I was falling in...
For me that is the hardest thing not being able to do anything to help my guy. He was an Alcoholic and beat that and Valium addiction but still deals with the aftermaths of Vietnam. War is hell but the aftermaths can be just as bad. But he does have his better times and I am just happy when he...
So I assume since you are here you think he has ptsd. I'm sure if you posted this again as an individual post you could get more responses but I will tell you what I think. From my experiences in the 2 yrs I have dated my Vet and what I have read on here it sounds like he is just wanting some...
The bottom line here is you are going to do what you want to do. Not really sure why you posted here. You had to have had some kind of idea what our reaction would be. Your life is yours and so are the consequences. Those will be hard lessons for you to learn but we can't tell you what to do...
Step back for a minute. Think about what you have told us. If this were your best friend that told you this same story about getting choked etc. What would you tell her?
This really helps for me to hear other people going through this. Although some of it could be the age of my Vet. He is 15 yrs older than me. But he has changed dramatically in his affection. When we first started dating we were having a lot of kissing and 'make out' sessions for lack of a...
I have had to learn to accept my Vet bf the way he is if it is going to work between us. It's not just because he is 15 yrs older than me. He doesn't like going out anymore to places like restaurants. Last time we went the food and service were awful and he tried to control his temper with the...
The bad thing is my boyfriend basically wins most of the time he does the 'Scratch offs'. He has told me that if he stopped winning he would quit which I doubt it. I was there Sat. night and I think that day he had won $350 off of 10 or so cards that he probably paid $100-$150 for. He thinks its...
I have done many kinds of art and crafts in my life but now I get too tired after work to do them. So I started coloring nice coloring books with colored pencils. My sisters gave me two books and some nice coloring pencils for Christmas. You can add water to the pencil and use it as watercolors...
Oh and I just thought about this but my boyfriend has gotten into gambling. Well I live in Texas and he does what are called 'Scratch offs' you can buy usually at convenience stores. He probably does up to 10 a day. Technically if you asked someone in AA or Al Anon they would not consider him...
Glad you like the blog. I need to get back to reading it myself.
My situation is different because I am not living with or dealing with an active alcoholic or addicted ex. But I think gam anon should help you because you would hear the stories like I do of how they are dealing with their...
So let me get it right. The guy on the phone told you to move on with your life. That is for you to decide and work through. I believe my ex has the same disease because his Dad was an alcoholic. He just 'uses' a different drug. It took me about a year getting away from him for it to finally...
Well since ya'll brought it up here I go trying to explain my confusing situation. Some of you may feel I am old fashioned but I won't have sex outside of marriage. My Vet is 15 yrs older than me and he will say he has problems with an erection anyway and the VA won't give him anything because...