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Actually you are right, but now i realized something with my amazing mind over here lol . It's not actually that I was different from my parents that I needed to realize but how they were exactly the same as me, they are just kids. Not authorities, for some reason, like me. I only really...

No, yes, that is exactly right. I am actively pushing away the people closest to me, on the basis that theyre like my abusers. It is very difficult to talk to someone when it is a matter that is so personal , and so many boundaries can be crossed . especially when we are from different...

Had PTSD for years. Never needed* a pill but i was forced to take it because of societal expectations. Sometimes, it can do more harm than good. My psychdoctor supports my decision, as I am making serious progress without antidepressants or medication and he also states the reason for it being...

I have a narcissistic father, who had gone to my university received awards and travelled around the world because he is "intelligent". My mother is a codependent. He used to hit my mum growing up, and just let me and my brother and sister watch this whole thing unfold. He did the same thing...

@lostforgottensoul Thank you. that means a lot to me. i'm actually starting to think this 'you guys think i have autism' thought, was just some sort of paranoia i have going on. that no one really said it, but i thought everyone implied it in their heads, to make me feel insecure and...

I see there is a recurring theme to this. and you are actually all trying to help. this is a lot to take in (but im sure youve all experienced it?) and im surprised at how relaxed everyone is. you may have guessed it but i have already ruined some potential harmless relationships with good...

@sun seeker i hear you loud and clear . i think this is where i should probably get up and leave for a while. i think i've dealt with the ptsd issues quite well and am pretty prosocial than before i got my diagnosis. (i go out much more with friends and stuff) . but ive realized reading this...

Thank you. i feel like i am being heard and am not going crazy here. I think the problem is everyone thinks I am out to do their community some level of harm, I am not. i have nothing against the community. i'll try to work on what you said. i have nothing against this community. if i did i...

Hell, I can imagine the replies to this already - did you see a doctor about this? are you sure you dont have Alzheimer's disease? That you brain is not slowly deteriorating? Nooo, this is what people with dissociative issues go through. And I know i have dissociative and mild hallucinating...

Maybe this is good advice... and it's alarming to me as well, because i am a pretty good communicator, but then i had this freaking seizure like activity the past few days, and cant keep a thought in my head. (Hence why i made the thread 'cant keep a thought in my head'). Ya see, not only...

I dont what it is, ever since the other day when i posted on here and people were like saying i have autism, ive been going in a cycle inside my head going 'you are disordered'. and that line of thinking came up from when i was traumatized a few years back. those same memories, same feelings...

this is an unbelievably interesting method. i think i will try to map out my behaviours, i dont know much about my grandparents but i will look into determining their traits from my parents . again, this is really interesting, and ive done something just a tiny bit similiar to this in the past...

That's a well thought of question. I dont know what to say, but this would be very helpful in teaching me to overcome this fear of not communicating well and also, knowing what to say in general, when a person is speaking with me. it's going to be a little difficult from here, and i think...

I can say that my dad never showed his emotions, or told me to feel for him. My mum does say she was sad, when I moved out to go to university and asks me whether i feel bad for her. My brother never really tells us to see things from his perspective. They may share their emotions like anger...

Man, this may not mean much if i do have autism and may just come off weird, but thank you all. i feel so much better knowing that these problems im having with people around me, or these problems which come in the form of patterns that have been there my whole life, maybe, are not all my fault..

@joeylittle i have been formally evaluated and raised concerns about autism, but the psychdoc only was convinced by ptsd.

@Fadeaway that makes a lot of sense. im a psych student (yeah i know right haha) but i was thinking about modelling, and that i must have adopted some behaviours. but you know sometimes, intelligence can play a role? if you have a certain protective factor like intelligence, you can work around...

@Fadeaway then why do i have so many problems with people in this manner? :/ maybe i am reenacting it, and putting narc behaviours onto others, and distancing them. i mean even a mod on here, made a whole list of all the things that 'i was getting wrong', and that must be a sign. 3 people...

@joeylittle I dont know why you're only quoting me, there are others here who said similiar things, especially in regard to triggers. But nonetheless, I will keep this in mind for next time. Hey if it makes you feel any better, I will not post at all and deal with this stuff on my own...

Nevermind. Forget i even mentioned it. I hope you will see my mention of you and others on this thread in my new forum thread as non-threatening, as this argument touches on a topic i wanted to talk about myself. i hope you see that forum thread as clarity, rather than an attack.

Hey there. I wanted to start this thread way before i had a little 'internet fallout' with other members on here (one of many, many - fallouts, whether online or out in the world, with either friends, potential girfriends or people who were older and wiser than i am and usually bigger* than...

nah i dont want to fight with you. i dont want to be a 'moral highground person' either. i think i am like that, but i dont want to be. and im trying not to. i just dont like people triggering me, maybe dont reply to my posts next time? (not in an offensive way, just a precautionary way, to not...

I understand that both sides misunderstood the intentions of each other. I get that all parties explained the misunderstanding from their own POVs. How did I not afford them the courtesy of hypervigilance? it is a bit hard to do that - also they didnt have to attack my post. they could have...

@Ragdoll Circus okay now this is just silly. we all make mistakes when it comes to communication. PTSDers are even more likely to make mistakes, when it comes to communication it's a cognitive processing deficit. i thought people at least here, would understand but apparently not everyone. i...

There is no place where that exists, but that is not the point. I was not invalidating the OP for stating that they can* get treatment if they resolve irrational thinking patterns. Generalization is an issue that affects everyone's thinking, and not understanding my post, and thinking I was...