Dissociation

[xraydave]

@xraydave - just a couple of things, first there is actually lots of healthy,...

i dont see why we should all be on the same page at all. this is 'myptsd' not 'ourptsd' for a reason, yeah? people will have their different viewpoints, and that's actually exactly why one doctor is going to be homophobic but another wouldnt have those views at all. :/

it is irrational thinking. because cognitive distortions are a part of anxiety, which comes from PTSD. thinking that just one person (the homophobic doctor) is reflective of a whole ('many doctors out there'), is a generalization and not fully grounded in rationalized thinking and reality.

that doesnt have to be bad thing*, that's merely what everyone with anxiety issues, would think like. Adding to that, when we have this sort of anixety, putting ourselves out into the world, is made so much more difficult. (and it looks so much more dangerous than it really is - in reality)

 

[EveHarrington]

since this is the second time youve felt the need to question my standpoint, i need to advise, if you...

It was actually a serious question! I'm in the states and I live in Hooterville (a green acres reference). Homophobia is pretty rampant. Perhaps not blatantly in your face but it's very much alive and kicking. I really would like to know where homiphobia doesn't exist. I'm sorry you interpreted my inquiry as such.

I honestly think that perhaps you should take your own advice as you're reading WAY too much into what I say. It was an honest question. You stated your opinion and I seriously wanted to know where such a place exists.

And above all, please breathe. :)

 

[EveHarrington]

And actually, if you believe that ZERO people are here for a debate, you haven't read enough threads or participated in enough discussions. I could probably name 5 members off the top of my head who do enjoy a good debate and enjoy debating here.

 

[xraydave]

It was actually a serious question! I'm in the states and I live in Hooterville (a green acres re...

There is no place where that exists, but that is not the point. I was not invalidating the OP for stating that they can* get treatment if they resolve irrational thinking patterns.

Generalization is an issue that affects everyone's thinking, and not understanding my post, and thinking I was invalidating what they were saying, is wrong. I was trying to help.

I am breathing. Humans do that all day. This is not how you handle a personality clash (which we seem to have), you need to be more understanding of it, or just ignore the person.

 

[EveHarrington]

I am bowing out now.

I cannot find anywhere else where I have second guessed you.

This is hitting on many trigger buttons for me for various reasons which I will not bring up.

I need to leave this conversation.

I wish you the best.

And------Done.

 

[Sideways]

Umm, yeah...how's about we backtrack...

"That sounds irrational. I don't think anyone would view you negatively for your relationship with another man in this day and age."

It's a bit of a long shot to translate that into "you must be assuming all doctors are homophobic and that would be a negative cognitive distortion because some doctors are, but a lot of doctors aren't."

I think, reading your first post @xraydave it's actually pretty reasonable that a person might read what you'd written as "you're irrational, doctors aren't like that anymore"...

That's not me picking a fight with you, just pointing out that your first post really wasn't well phrased (read: very misleading) given what you're now saying. But I like what you're now saying (not all doctors are homophobes), so...

 

[EveHarrington]

@Ragdoll Circus

You said exactly what I was going to say before it hit me why this is so triggering to me. Re: The interpretation of quoted text.

 

[xraydave]

@Ragdoll Circus okay now this is just silly. we all make mistakes when it comes to communication. PTSDers are even more likely to make mistakes, when it comes to communication it's a cognitive processing deficit. i thought people at least here, would understand but apparently not everyone.

i dont think i should be 'punished' for making a 'misleading post' - youre not the internet police. you have no power there.

@Ragdoll Circus @EveHarrington I think this is mainly to do with the fact we are all hypervigilant - we all see dangers where there are no dangers. i actually seriously have no issue, if you are not deliberately out to 'get me' or 'harm me' or anything. I just dont see why it is so difficult to see a post, and think 'hmm that looks a bit wrong, but he's obviously hypervigilant and has ptsd, and can have emotional and cognitive processing difficulties so maybe i will look over it without questioning him like he is some dictator or authority over the issue'

also notice, how we have totally forgotten about the OP? Do you think that this was and will be in any way an effective place to host debates and arguments with online users? I dont think so.

 

[mary1979]

@Ragdoll Circus okay now this is just silly. we all make mistakes when it comes to...

Pretty awkward here....
Do you realise that BOTH sides misunderstood each others intentions in the first instance and that's the essential cause here?
And that all parties tried to explain the misunderstanding and rectify it early on?

So you expect others to recognise your hypervigilance and make allowances, but don't afford them the same courtesy?
Just have to have the last say and attempt to demoralise the other party with 'internet police' retorts didn't you lol

And I was about to say the same thing about the poor OP, who's a new member. Poor thing must be thinking 'far out! I've entered a war zone here' very therapeutic haha.

 

[EveHarrington]

Sorry, nevermind whoops. These forum functions actually work!

 

[xraydave]

Pretty awkward here....
Do you realise that BOTH sides misunderstood each others intentions in the fi...

I understand that both sides misunderstood the intentions of each other. I get that all parties explained the misunderstanding from their own POVs.

How did I not afford them the courtesy of hypervigilance? it is a bit hard to do that - also they didnt have to attack my post. they could have merely just ignored it.

There is no such thing as a 'last say', people will continue to go through the same cycles, whether i like it or not.

I dont understand why you are saying 'lol and 'haha', there is nothing funny about this at all.

 

[EveHarrington]

my interpreting your statement xray in the most literal way possible does not mean i have cognitive deficits. Actually you were expecting me to do mind reading in order to know that you didn't mean that in the most literal most straightforward way. I literally thought wow this guy lives in a very liberal, very tolerant place! I don't think my interpretation of your statement has anything to do with PTSD. I think it's pretty clear------if you write something and later say that's not what you really meant, how is that an issue of me having cognitive deficits? It's not. And if you have cognitive deficits and can't handle an honest inquiry with no harm intended then maybe the internet isn't a good place for you? Just a thought.

Nobody attacked your post. Please stop saying you were attacked when I asked a question! We are supposed to ask questions and that's what I did, no harm intended.