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This.

Thanks @Enaila my T said that he doesnt own my story or when i share. Its just hard.

I have been working really hard at therapy for a few years now, and a bit over a year ago started to tell my therapist more about the sexual abuse. There have been a couple of big details that i withheld and then let go of at other times, probably one of the biggest last week. I am feeling...

@NightSky I'm where you are. Almost three years in and I still struggle. I feel like it needs to be black and white. I need to remember everything or nothing, and if it was so important, then why does it feel so scattered and detached. It's really hard. It's probably a coping or protection...

I think it would be good in this circumstance to reach out. It is clear to yourself that you need the support and it sounds like your T was VERY supportive of you reaching out. I know it is hard, but I do think it could help bridge the gap until you see him again.

I struggle with this as well. I think the only think I find that can help me is to just distract myself - give myself small goals. I acknowledge how I am feeling - such as, Yes, I am feeling really down and triggered and really want to go home now - but then give myself small tasks - such as...

I can relate as well - I also get emotional flashbacks. Good for you to make the connection!

Thanks @Friday - lots to think about... I think the biggest was probably spending so much time with my spouse - just being together. The pace, although busy with seeing the sights, was slow in that we just did what we wanted - no schedules. I also connected more deeply with my spirituality there.

Today is my first day back at work after a two week vacation. My husband and I went on a 10-day trip to Italy to celebrate our 10th anniversary. It was a really lovely trip, I felt better, there weren't as many triggers - it was like an escape. Well, I have been back at work for just today -...

I am losing it a bit and don't know what to do. I found out the oldest son of some friends had been abusing a boy/boys - and charges have been filed. He is 15 (I believe) and has been through so much himself (adopted at about 5 after experiencing years of abuse himself). I guess this also isn't...

I don't understand what you are getting at....

I really appreciate everyone's responses. I did recognize that neither of us were fighting fair. I did try to talk with him yesterday - to apologize and ask what he needs in order to feel supported. It is hard - as I can't really support him in some of the ways that he needs it, just by the...

You are absolutely correct - I don't think either of us is "fighting fair" - it is hard for both of us, just in different ways. He is a big "fairness" and "justice" type person - and does work at not keeping a tally, although admittedly hard for him. I just feel the burden in that - and...

I really like this a lot - thank you for your response. I think it just hard for us - as humans - to ask for help for something that no one can "see" It's also hard because he was seeing a therapist - but decided to stop going. He also has a really hard time spending money "unnecessarily" -...

I think it is - I just don't know what to do about it...

I absolutely am there - I just can't always be there in the same capacity. A good example is that there are some occasions that I need to ask my husband to do bedtime with the toddler (we generally do an "every other schedule") - as at the end of the day, I am spent and just can't. Another...

I am happy to hear that you are starting an out patient program, I know that probably feels awful, but hopefully it will help. If it helps at all, losing your hair ~3 months having a baby is totally normal. Happened to me with both of my girls. Still sucks, but just wanted to pass that along.

My husband and I got into a fight yesterday about my PTSD. He was saying how tired he was and was feeling like I was not doing my fair share - I asked him how he would respond if I had cancer - and he said that this isn't cancer, it isn't at the same level. I don't like playing the game of -...

Also wanted to welcome you here. I relate so much to what you said here - I too feel an overwhelming amount of self-hatred. Some of the places where I have started are at least acknowledging that other people do not feel this way towards me. I can accept (albeit think they are nuts) that other...

Sorry, I have taken a bit to process my feelings more and consider the responses here. Do I believe my husband had ill-intention, likely no. However, I am really struggling with the feelings it triggered in me, if he really heard me when I disclosed to him, and that he seems to be forgetting...

He's never told me he didn't believe me, I think he just clearly wasn't thinking, which has caused me doubts about if he actually does believe me or if he really heard me when I disclosed what happened...

@Gia1019 and @TexCat thank you for your words. I am definitely in shock and just speechless. I am tempted at this point to stuff this all down until therapy on Tuesday :/

I love my T. He loves and cares for me (appropriately) and is willing to hug me and hold my hand to allow me to open up and cry. He is beyond patient and has never given up on me.

I'm feeling crushed right now. I was abused by boys who were 11-12, I was 5. We went to dinner at a friend's, My husband was having a conversation about a situation at our friends work, and he mentioned a 6th grader who was known as a sexual predator (or something to that effect). And my...

I have been with my therapist for just over 2 years. I would say, for me, it has not been the most "efficient", but it was what I have needed in this process. I needed to take a lot of time to build up trust and feel ready to open up. So - it has been me and what I need that has really driven...