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Everywhere I go I am abused. Sexually, physically, emotionally, psychologically, verbally; by my parents, the rest of my family, by my "friends", by peers, by authority, by mental health professionals, and even by people on this website who supposedly have been through similar abuse and should...

When you are depressed, you’re expected to reach out for help. So that’s what I did: I went to several therapists over the years who specialize in trauma and PTSD (group and individual), I've gone through so-called "evidence based" treatment, I probably tried at least 7 different medications, I...

I've grown a lot in the past few years, and I've realized a lot of hard truths about the world. I've always been honest enough with myself to see the world for how it truly is, even while others continue to lie to themselves and others. One thing I've realized is that this thing we call "PTSD"...

Are you f*cking kidding me? Recognizing and identifying my parents as one of the many sources of my trauma and PTSD is a necessary step in recovering from my childhood. That's a hell of a lot different from unwarranted "blaming", as you so carelessly put it. Yet according to you that won't get...

I thought I was the only one who got this! I've had quite a few times where I couldn't remember a flashback immediately after it happened. You know you had a flashback but you don't remember anything that happened in it, pretty much exactly how you described it. Almost like it never happened...

I will be seeing a psychiatrist in January (earliest appointment I could get) so hopefully they can prescribe something then. I will now.

I'm sorry that happened. That level of trauma is unmatched by most. Thanks for the inbox.

So my anxiety/panic is pretty bad. My "resting" or sitting heart rate is pretty high for my age. The last 3 times I went to the doctor my sitting heart rate was 123, 115, and 127. My chest hurts a lot of the time, especially at the end of the day. By the end of the day, especially if I'm sleep...

I have a bunch of other appointments lined up already

Yeah, I've been thinking about doing an IOP.

It's not, I go to therapy twice a week, because there are so many things to cover. It's not that simple. Maybe I have mislead you. I'm not just sitting around complaining. I don't know why you make this assumption. I'm trying to do what little I can to get better, even though it has proven to...

I've thought about looking into a GED program, but I want to get back on meds first right now because I am barely functioning enough to do everyday stuff sometimes. After I left regular school I did online school for awhile but that fell apart.

I'm 18 and still live with my parents. I so want to get away from them but I can't. My mental health deteriorated to the point where I dropped out of school in 9th grade so I'm dependent on them for everything. They are part of the reason I'm like this, (depressed, suicidal, anxious...

Yeah that makes sense. Sometimes the sleep paralysis hallucinations I get are loosely related to trauma in some way. I saw a sleep specialist a few weeks ago about the twitching and spasming in my legs that goes on at night, and have an appointment at a sleep study lab soon.

I get sleep paralysis pretty often. It comes and goes, sometimes I'll have it more frequently. The first time I can remember having sleep paralysis was when I was 5 years old, I saw a tarantula on the wall in my room. That was around the time I believe my first trauma happened. I'm 18 now and...

It isn't uncommon for people to beat their kids, but that doesn't mean it's okay. A lot of people choose to joke about the abuse they endured as children as a coping mechanism. Not everyone will show that they're traumatized, but I bet almost all those people probably grew up afraid of their...

I was just thinking about this weird day I had a few weeks ago, maybe longer. I don't remember exactly when. I felt unsettled, and got this sense of something sinister in my past, and it was familiar like it was a memory. Everything seemed darker, lighting and atmosphere. I got the feeling that...

It certainly sounds like it. You already have clear memories of being abused, so you should trust that this one is real too.

I came across a photo of a girl I was friends with when I was little, and remembered when I was 4 or 5 we were playing at her house and got angry over something stupid and I bit her finger nail off. Yeah, I know, that's pretty bad. I'm pretty sure she had to go to the hospital afterwards...

Sometimes, when unreality really sets in, I feel like I'm supposed to be somewhere else. This world I live in is not the right one, and there's a place outside of here (like another timeline/dimension/etc) where I'm supposed to be, and someone is waiting for me to wake up. This is merely a...

I am at a weird place right now. I suppose I always have been, but especially now. I don't know what to do. It's kinda complicated and I will never be able to relay everything but I'll try to explain my situation anyway. I feel like my story should be out there somewhere, even if relatively...

I can definitely relate to both types of hypervigilance you described. I feel like I can see everyone's bad intentions. I don't trust people very much. I expect people will want to degrade/manipulate/humiliate me in some way, at the very least, or physically hurt me, at worst. Why? Because they...

i don't like giving people my name either haha. i usually give strangers a fake name. i thought that was just me.

Does anyone else feel like they're too dissociated most of the time to be hypervigilant? I get hypervigilant sometimes, but not very often because most of the time I'm in a fog, on a different planet, numb, etc. I also don't leave the house very often.

hey. i'm sorry you've felt this way for so long. it's a weird and insufferable way to live. i've been experiencing depersonalization/derealization/dissociation to some degree for a really long time too, almost as long as i can remember. i don't really know when it started. i feel like i've never...