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I Had An "angry" Breaking Point

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DaisySH

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So... I just need to vent...need advice... My husband and I... well it's not working... I have some emotional issues myself and he has combat PTSD.. He is emotionally numb and has been for years..All of our financial issues and his job and stuff have made the cup spill and then some...We are currently in limbo, he has not pushed for divorce but has said our relationship is over, he is not in love with me and we've started doing things separately...We have started couples counseling and although he continues to go I am not sure what he wants at this point... I was so depressed and sad and felt like my world crumbled...He is emotionally detached, but it appears only from me...He has the best interactions and friends at work. That hurts.... I guess I am preaching to the choir... I have always been there for him and although I understand he needs his "me" time, I don't know how much I can take of this... All of these issues are bringing up past relationships in which I endured horrible abuse. He is not abusive himself but those feelings are there... Well, I reached a point where I am just angry.. I saw his phone where he had a text message from a coworker and the interaction bothered me so much... He states he has no interest in anyone else but now I don't know. He is going to therapy himself but he is not consistent... We own our house and although I want to run and leave him I don't have anywhere else to go...Neither does he...I am stuck in a situation where running is not the option... We have therapy on Monday and I am unsure whether I just want to bring up for us to separate or not... I am willing to do all possible and give him the time he needs but I cannot sit around and wait for him... I will be starting therapy for myself because I know these feelings are not normal.. I have given up so much, worked so hard and have been through hell with him and it hurts... I believed on forever and although I understand his illness, I also understand that he should be willing also.. I just know that when the well is dry we know the worth of water... Once I turn off my emotions, there goes everything... I am trying really hard not to get there.... :(
 
I'm going through almost the same thing! My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and what you just wrote sounded like it came right from my own mouth.
I hope things work out for the both of you.
I had a break down last night about everything I've been going through.
 
Sometimes it's better all round just to call it a day, and move on. I remember when I got divorced all those years ago, it was a really difficult thing to go through.

We both knew what the problem was, I was never at home, as I had to work away from home, to earn enough to support the family. We just got into our own little worlds, and drifted apart over the years.

Yet, at the end of it all, there was feeling of relief that it was all over, no more pretending, no more lying, and best of all, no more arguments, a sense of peace, all be it a painful peace.

The financial cost was extensive, but minor to me, as the most important things that I lost, was my two daughters, and that still hurts, even today, some twenty three years later.
 
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