I'm Stuck On How To Explain To My Ignorant Parents ...

[Hemels]

Yes my parents are ignorant. I am totally stuck and stumped on wat to do, wondering if you guys can give me your words of wisdom :smile:

I was diagnosed having C-PTSD in Feb 09 and then diagnosed with BPD in Nov 09. After I had my breakdown in Nov 09 and ended up in hospital and on more meds my mum came round to give me a hand with the house chores. She asked what was the matter and I told her, the reply I got was "Don't be silly it's all in your head. You shouldn't stay on them tablets long, theres nothing wrong with you". Ingorance is a understatment when it comes to my parents.

My partner went and told his parents and they have been very supportive and understanding, yet mine seem to think i'm over reacting or making it up it seems.

Any words of wisdom would help tons guys :smile:

:Hug_emoticon:

Hemmy xXx

 

[growingpains]

Does it matter what they think if you know what you need to feel "normal"? Is BPD bipolar or borderline? Anyway, if experts in the field give you medicine and say you have a problem and you have needed hospitalization then I take that as a pretty good sign that pills are what you need right now. Maybe you could give them info about the disorder or try to explain calmly how you are with and then without medicine. It is hard for some people to understand what psychological problems do to a person. It is pretty mean to say to someone dealing with psychological issues that it is all in their head. But if it is just ignorance then enlighten them on the topic and if they can't accept that there is not much more you can do at this point.

 

[lyrical]

Oh how I sympathise!

I would say if its genuine ignorance then maybe print them some info. of here for them to read? You could maybe ask them to read it as you would like/need their support and would like them to try and understand as you want to have/keep a good, open relationship with them.

If they don't budge at all, as my Mum has point blank refused to :mad: I think you have to cut your losses and try and keep as good a relationship with them as possible. Maybe if they keep making comments like that you could say that you'd rather not discuss it in order not to argue.

*hugs*, know that you're not alone, there are many people here who face the same ignorance from parents/family/friends/work mates etc.

Thinking of you

Lyrical x

 

[a3a2]

Take care of yourself first. I would love to tell you your parents will come around, but they sound a lot like mine, and I didn't even bother trying. You decide, withing the reality of their ignorance, what you want your relationship to be, and stick to it. Perhaps that means cutting ties, perhaps it means a very superficial relationship.

Good luck.

 

[Deleted member 541]

Hemels,

You can't teach the ignorant.......Plain and simple.... Your parents refuse to see the issues that you have. Whatever their reasoning is......You are not going to get the support that you need from them, without causing yourself a lot of stress first.

My advice...Just drop it, don't discuss your mental issues, medication, or diagnosis with them. Get the support from other sources, and maintain a relationship with your parents, without adding this stress to you, or them....

 

[CCurry]

I'm so sorry your parents are not supportive.

For those that understand there is nothing needed to say and for those that don't there is nothing anybody can say.

Take care of yourself.

C.

 

[Harney]

I stopped trying to argue with people who say "it's all in your head". My response nowadays is "yes, it is -- because that's where my brain is located."

 

[tryintobreathe]

They just might not ever understand. It's so hard for some people to really believe mental illness is an illness. They think that it is something you can control if you wanted to. If you had cancer, no one would question you. It's really sad how ignorant some people can be.

That said....I also think part of it is that it might be too hard for your parents to accept their child has an illness like PTSD and BPD. They could feel like there is nothing they could do to help you and that is probably very scary. It doesn't mean they don't love you and want the best for you but they just might not be capable of understanding it and helping you.

Jen

 

[Hemels]

Thanks Guys for the great advice.

I will try once more to educate them and if they wont budge I will leave it at that :)

Hemmy xXx

 

[becvan]

Just food for thought.. I tried to educate my parents on PTSD. It didn't go very well. I moved over two years ago to get specialized help. As I slowly started improving, my family started asking questions, real questions and really wanted the answers. I had been sick for so long it had become completely normal to them. It was just me. I was just "crazy." It wasn't until I improved that they were even able to see that I was sick to begin with.

So even if you don't get anywhere on educating them now, there is always a possibility that down the road it will sink in and they will see it. Keep working on yourself. :)

bec