Medition classes are triggers for me, any alternative available?

[Deleted member 1860]

What is LH? What is MM? (Sort of lost!)

 

[cherryblossom]

I totally agree with Solara - please don't use abbreviations / acronyms that many people wont understand. It really doesn't take much effort to write words out in full so that everyone can participate. Thanks.

 

[saffy]

HI Therisa

within a group setting

Maybe this is the problem. When you meditate you are aiming for total relaxation and focus on something that takes your awareness away from your surroundings. This could make you feel very vulnerable. Until you feel totally safe with the people around you you will find it hard to relax. Trying to will make you anxious.

I hope that makes sense. Hope that helps :)

Best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[therisa]

Saffy, I don't do very well, with group settings, since my very severe panic attack, on the local transit system, in August 2007. Even the support groups that I have attended for depression and anxiety, have triggered this response, by me.

 

[saffy]

Certainly sounds like you do not. Do you know what caused the panic? (you don't have to answer that, I'll understand.) :)

Trying to work on other things while you are still anxious in the environment will just cause more anxiety. Does that make sense.

I can only think that by working on your fear of groups combined with private meditation, or support for depression might seem daunting at first. But if it is your fear of group setting that is holding you back the group support situation is not able to progress anyway. :)

I really hope you get the help you deserve to overcome these fears. :)

we are always here to listen on here anyway. :)

Best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[therisa]

Saffy, I have a very complex history, which impacts upon my ability to heal, when dealing within a group situation. Much, I am not ready, to share, with others, even with my best friend. But, here are the bare bones that I feel comfortable with sharing. I was bullied, from kindergarten to grade 10, often surrounded by groups, as it happened to me, for various reasons. I was hospitalized once, because of the bullying, for bruised kidneys. I have been attacked and chased, by others, because I am, a transsexual (Male-to-Female), who didn't passed as female, at the time, but now do.

To travel, to these support groups, I am forced to take transit, during peak hours, which acts as a trigger, for my severe anxiety/panic attacks, as my personal space is invaded, by the other passengers. Never mind, I am, very introverted, by nature, except when I have a pen, in my hand, or a computer, in front of me.

I have taken Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (12 sessions, the maximum allowed, at a local hospital) , where I found out that I have doing things, like doing crosswords or writing poetry, when taking transit, is a part of this therapy, in distracting myself, from the triggers, around me. In fact, my poetry is, my way to deconstructing the reasons, for my reaction, at that particular time, in a safe and controllable manner.

Please, Saffy, I don't mean to come across, as being dismissive towards your offered help, but there are serious issues that I can't face, yet. I have been in-and-out of various counselling situations, over the past seven years, making various degrees of progress. Trust me; I was much worse, three years ago.

I do appreciate, the help that is given, from the heart. Except I need to move, at my own pace, when dealing with my trauma. Much of this trauma has only come to light, over the past 6 years, after decades of repression.

 

[ms spock]

HI Therisa
When you meditate you are aiming for total relaxation and focus on something that takes your awareness away from your surroundings.

I thought with mindfulness meditation it is more about just noticing what is going on rather than having a goal of a certain type?

 

[therisa]

Ms Spock, it's been so long, since I had any mindful meditation session. I don't remember.

 

[ms spock]

Okay I am reading up on it at the moment.

My understand is that mindfulness mediation is about cultivating our innate capacity to pay attention, on purpose, in the present moment and be non judgmental about what we are experiencing.

Meditation is not about feeling a certain way. It is about feeling the way you feel. It's not about making the mind empty or still, though stillness does deepen meditation and can be cultivated over time. Meditation is about letting the mind be as it is and knowing something about how it is in this moment. It is not about getting somewhere else, it is about letting yourself be where you are...

 

[saffy]

Hi Therisa

I totally understand :)

Of course it is important to do it at your own pace and with the help you are getting and hopefully our support on here things will get easier for you.

Thanks for explaining meditation Ms Spock, I cant seem to put it into words very well :)

Best wishes
Saffy :)

 

[sss]

Hello therisa. Yes there are other practices based on the principles of mindfulness that might be useful to ease you into the practice more gently. Two major beneficial aspects of meditation are reperception (the ability to step back and let thoughts and feelings pass through the mind) and embodiement (the practice of being increasingly in touch with your body). you can practice these things in other ways than just meditation (which can be very hard when you have traumatic emotions just beneath the surface).

Try the following:

1) Instead of sitting down and meditating, start by focusing on a task. Try juggling or playing a musical instrument or solving a sudoku or balancing on one leg or drumming a beat with your hands... and do one of these things with as much concentration as possible. When you concentrate on a task like this, a task that is slightly difficult, you teach your mind to focus, to remain on the present moment regardless of whether you want to shift your attention elsewhere. It can operate as a precursor to meditation.

2) Practice relaxation techniques. Especially the progressive muscle relaxation. Then, after you've done that, take some time to experiment moving different parts of your body. Wiggle and move and stretch and flex all the different parts of your body. Don't think too much about it, just lie there and do it. This can be a precursor to the body scan meditation and yoga. remember: do this gently; don't move in any way that feels uncomfortable or painful.

I too have had difficulty meditating. My traumatic emotions bubble up in the form of stabbing pains in my chest. Then my mind starts racing and dissociating to cope. Unfortunately, meditation has been packaged a little too neatly these days and there isn't too much literature in psychology about alternate routes to the same practice.

Hope this helps!

 

[saffy]

Hi therisa

Was thinking of stuff for you to do over the weekend.

Tai chi is a meditative exercise which might work?

Not sure how you would feel about that?

best wishes
Saffy :)