Odd experience

[BigBirdsSister]

I was lying down today, reading, feeling very low and tired as I have been the last few weeks. I was thinking about how to get the courage to tell T the details of my trauma and about our discussion about my fears of formal diagnosis (Past T and Gp say GP. My current T thinks a more formal one would help me validate myself)
So I am laying there when suddenly when suddenly I felt like I was two different people...like one of us was functioning and reading without feeling and the other was the one who needed to lie down and was feeling so down. "I" was the book reading person and I had become separated from "other me". But i knew "she" was there and still knew what she was feeling but I wasn't her. I was fully awake and this has happened in sessions too. It's not the first time. I am just unsure what to call it. Any input would be appreciated.

 

[Freida]

Not sure if this is the same thing but...

I describe it as having two realities that run at the same time, so I have one foot in each. It can be really disconcerting because I KNOW what is happening is "then" and "now" so it's not really a flashback. But they both feel completely real. I told my T about that long before I told her the details of the trauma and she agreed because we needed to find a way to get me grounded in the now before we worried about what happened in the then...

 

[BigBirdsSister]

Not sure if this is the same thing but...

I describe it as having two realities that run at the same time, so I have one foot in each. It can be really disconcerting because I KNOW what is happening is "then" and "now" so it's not really a flashback. But they both feel completely real. I told my T about that long before I told her the details of the trauma and she agreed because we needed to find a way to get me grounded in the now before we worried about what happened in the then...

Hiya. That sounds simalar, but for me, it was rather two me's. It might be two different realties as you describe but since the depressed reality was only a minute before, it wasn't really "then" and "now" for me. It was more I sort of detached from myself. Like two souls, or me's in my head. Its puzzling. When I am frightened I instantly switch to this also. I guess I am wondering if it is indeed a form of dissociation among others that which I have experienced.

 

[Freida]

Yep - I'd guess a form of dissociation.....

 

[BigBirdsSister]

Yep - I'd guess a form of dissociation.....

I was afraid of that. Thanks though for helping me clarify. I want to be sure before I speak to my therapist. I wish it could be explained away through energy issues or something.

 

[Sideways]

Do you relate at all to descriptions of depersonalisation (a form of dissociation)? Because it sounds a lot like that.

It also sounds like you know what triggered it - distress about the discussion with your T...

Maybe try a whole heap of grounding self-soothing activities to bring the internal distress levels down? Or even journalling about the discussion with your T to help get the distressing thoughts and worry about it out of your system?