Relationship Recognizing When He Is Not Triggered - Making Jokes

[Eleanor]

H and I have been struggling a bit with me being constantly on edge waiting for the next "blow up"/dissociative episode. He noticed something the other evening on the phone. He had said something that put me on alert - but then joked about something and he said I calmed down immediately. He observed that he can't (not just doesn't but CAN'T) joke when he is in an episode. I mostly look for signs that he IS in, now I'll start a list of reliable indicators that he ISN'T in.

Have others noticed that suffers can only make jokes when they are ok? And are there other things you all have noticed that would help differentiate normal tired and annoyed from sliding into dissociation?

 

[amethist]

Hi Eleanor.

I have noticed something similar to this too, full of fun and makes jokes about all sorts of things when he is fine.

The other thing is that my husband can also make jokes when he is not too good, as if trying to lighten his own mood. The problem here is the jokes can be sometimes inappropriate, which is something he never did before.

 

[Nerilee]

This is a really good thread. My husband does exactly the same thing!

I find it hard to know what's triggers and what's not... mainly because its a new thing for us.