Snapping In Half Like A Pencil

[Dana1010]

When I've been stuck in my flashback loop for a while and am fully triggered, I can feel my core snap in half like a pencil. It feels like I am literally physically snapping somewhere in the solar plexus region. Clean in half. I feel like I'm not a person anymore, I have no agency, I can't do anything. Like I've been killed but am hooked up to some artificial support that is keeping my lungs filled with air. Sometimes there is physical pain or burning in the chest area. The desire for revenge sort of fails and becomes total, consuming defeat. Death, but without the peace of death.

Does anyone else experience anything like this. Any idea how to deal with it?

 

[theotherside]

All i can say is sorry. And i think i understand

 

[Namenotdiagnosis]

I totally understand how you feel. I was in full trigger about a month ago, lasted three days, could not function, was in and out of sleep, scared of my husband , my child , who are lovely people , in fact I was scared off my own shadow.
Felt like I couldn't breathe , it was the worst feeling ever. I can actually confidently say it was one of my worst flasbacks I had experienced for a very long time. I was left with feeling depressed for days not wanting to socialise , talk or eat. However I never had the pain thank goodness so I'm really sorry you did , but i experienced smells and taste that were lingering for days. I never ever thought id say this but I wouldn't wish that on my own worst enemy, even though I spend most of my life seeking revenge. It hurt physcologically ,emotionally, mentally but most of all for me personally it tortured me because my young child had to see me in this way and I felt soooo bad that for about a week I could not be his real mother because I had become so vulnerable. So yes , to some degree I totally understand you, we all feel different emotions but please don't be hard on yourself because I'm so sorry to say but it will probably happen again and again and again because it is part of our life that we can unfortunately never eliminate completely . My opinions completely so please forgive me if I have offended you or anyone else that reads this post, it sincerely is not and would never be my intention to hurt anyone.

 

[Recovery4Me]

It would be a good time to utilize or procure a T, as well as if you have insurance get a nice check-up. During the sever loops, I utilized both and this helped coupled with short-terms of anxiety meds. After which, I push on self regulation techniques to self sooth and abate the rumination.

Many of my full scale flashbacks have ceased after various forms of therapy. I still have a few that reoccur when my stress cup is topped and a major trigger kicks it off, but nothing like the horror of before. I am setting in place breathing methods and meditation techniques at this stage to self regulate.

hugs to you if you accept