Relationship Sufferer Is 'back'! Normal Service Has Resumed

[Linzee]

I feel like this is my new family.

Just wanted to share that I received communication this evening from SO exactly 3 weeks to the day from the start of his isolation. This happened just after last Christmas too, an exact period of 3 weeks??

He reached out and sent a long text of apology and explained he was dealing with a lot of stuff and the way he handles that is to switch off, though he understands that's not fair.

I never expected nor asked for an explanation I am impressed! He's brave.

I've read so many long term supporters say that they wish they knew what they were dealing with early on so the could have known how to respond and better understand.

I followed all the advice given to a 'tee' (it was tough) and he has seemingly returned of his own accord feeling/sounding like his usual funny self again. I am cautiously taking baby steps however and have kept conversation light and positive.

I don't want to lose sight of what I need going forward, which is to establish some simple boundaries that can be communicated with minimal effort. For when this inevitably happens again.

Thank you all for educating me, preparing me and helping me navigate this vast ocean that is PTSD.

I'm still hoping for everyone else too.

 

[ladee]

I LOVE reading Good News.!
I am a sufferer and know how hard it is , but you asked for help and followed thru!!. Very proud of you.
Taking care of YOU!.
Just love it when someone listens to those who have been there. Hopefully saving yourself and him, a lot of heartache.
Gentle hugs and lots of hope moving forward.

 

[BlueOrange]

YAY!

It's awesome to see a member of the family getting good things :)

 

[Linzee]

I LOVE reading Good News.!
I am a sufferer and know how hard it is , but you asked for help and followed...

Definitely could not have come through it on my own. He's already talking about meeting and doing something next week and in my head I'm a little like "whoa there...let's not go filling up the cup too quickly again"

Thank you so much, what kind words you gave me.:hug:

 

[Snowflakes]

@Linzee You are certainly part of my family. I'm sad when you're upset and happy when you are. I'm glad we are all here for each other.

 

[Linzee]

@Linzee You are certainly part of my family. I'm sad when you're upset and happy...

Awww, thankyou @Snowflakes that's very kind and supportive. I know my journey is pretty much just beginning. This will be a lifelong rollercoaster if we make it. So I'm not going anywhere, will need all the advice and support I can get from you guys. And hopefully be of some help myself.

That first text message he sent could probably of made me last out another 3 weeks if I had to. It put to bed a lot of insecurities that had crept in and confirmed almost 'verbatim' what a lot of you said was probably going on his end.

In future I think a little text to let me know he's taking time out, but that we're fine and he'll be back, is gonna be crucial to survival of this relationship.

 

[Newtoptsd]

I did the opposite, I messaged. No reply.

 

[BlueOrange]

I did the opposite, I messaged. No reply.

*hugs*

 

[Linzee]

I did the opposite, I messaged. No reply.

So you reached out, does that make you wrong? Heck no! Just shows you care. Don't feel bad for using your own coping mechanism/survival mode they same way your SO is using theirs.
I'm sure your SO read your message and absorbed it. Let them come to you, you can do no more. ((Hugs))

 

[Newtoptsd]

Thank you @BlueOrange and @Linzee :hug:

I actually don't feel terrible now you and another supporter have reassured me it's not the end of the world.

I didn't message anything that required a response, I just put 'I hope you're ok, here's a link to a funny video I thought you'd like'

The no response has actually given me the strength I need to not reach out again now. I know I can't and just have to let him be! Thanks so much for not making me feel like I made a massive error, I appreciate it more than you know!!

 

[Grasshoppa]

I feel like this is my new family.

Just wanted to share that I received communication this evening fro...

This makes me smile all over. I am so happy you have communication going now.

I did the opposite, I messaged. No reply.

Just hang in there. All will be fine I have to keep telling myself that. I did the same thing after not texting for one whole week and I got nothing. But I am not giving up on him. I will give it 2 weeks and check on him.

 

[Newtoptsd]

@Grasshoppa I know I am, feeling ok about it all at the moment so glad you're doing ok too!

:hug: