You Know You Have PTSD When...

[Ocean5]

I just found this thread. While beginning is funny, insightful, it's sad, but makes me feel so much less alone and weird. I think this will be my daily therapy thread to read for perspective.

- you live in a secure building. yet put chair with heavy box on chair against door every night. and check lock several times before bed.
- always notice exists, quick escape routes, and stay near them.
- people get spooked because you walk without making a sound - you startle them. (i've learned to make sound just not to freak people out...)
- lost contact with people...they call...you don't return calls...they reach out - you never do. you're just trying to "stay, or get stable"
- shows like Criminal Minds are your favorite - you can relate to such pain and suffering.
- spend so much time listening to positive podcast, audio books, etc for a way out. for some peace...
- international news over past several months...too much. way too much. (i'm not evening going to use examples since it may trigger people)

 

[holdenmonty]

You know you have ptsd when you drink alcoholic beverages so you can't lie to yourself

 

[Anrish]

@Ocean5 : Wish you all the best for daily reading - and I hope that it will help you. You're not alone. :hug:

You know you have PTSD when the usual question "How are you" leads to racing thoughts in your head - because you don't know it the question was honest or just small talk - and you don't feel well with empty words - because you already feel empty enough inside.

 

[Changing4Best]

... when you regret a decision you made years ago about your future, but it is too late to change it, because it is set in stone in your mind.

 

[Ocean5]

When you believe you must have been really bad in your past life and that's why I'm being punished in this life

Seriously I've often wondered if I was some ruthless dictator, or something in previous life....

 

[Changing4Best]

These thoughts have occurred to me too, what on earth did I do to deserve this?

 

[jaccat]

When an idea like not eating for thirty six hours seems like a healthy decision.

 

[Changing4Best]

When you forget to say "I love you." to a loved one and fear you might die before you next get a chance to tell them so.

 

[Ronin]

... when the person you worry about that happening to is never you
... which is a part of why you just don't say that phrase. No phrases, less worries.

 

[jaccat]

When you have a massive argument with yourself over whether you can justify putting the central heating on because you're cold and you lose.

 

[Changing4Best]

... when reading this thread is your favorite thing to do here on these forums, because it is good to compare notes with other sufferers, which helps to cancels out your abuser's words that you faked PTSD.

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

When you're in a session with your therapist and she asks you how you felt when your mom said "f**k you" to your dad and you can't remember.

When the only reason you realize that you went numb and stopped feeling is when your sister tells you she can feel the stress in the house that you're always talking about but you can't and haven't been feeling almost any emotions.

When you see how sad your dad is and you want to hug him and save him.

When you're in the grocery store with your mom and one of your sisters and your mom comes up behind you sliding her hand across your shoulder unexpectedly as she makes room for another person to pass by and your eyes get huge and you jump and recoil.

When you come home from therapy where you were processing traumas with your therapist and you get so tired you feel like you haven't slept in days.