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What Bad Shit Have You Done - Daily, As it Comes To You, Your Past, Lets Be Honest

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@Cashew ((((HUGS)))) "Seriously considered suicide". I'm so sorry you have been there.

I have too and my one real attempt failed thankfully because our house was so poorly insulated, I'm an impatient person and the realization I could cause an explosion and hurt innocents was the deal breaker and I made the call. It was not my time and when I think of all I would have missed had I been successful, it's mind blowing and for me confirmation there is a power greater than ourselves that only wants good for us if we allow it.

Unfortunately I have found for myself, that option once considered, lurks and still whispers to me occasionally.
 
I've been watching porn...sometimes... Which people say isn't a bad thing..maybe?

However when I tapped on one site..it took me to child porn site. It was disgusting and I immediately closed page but that image of those two girls is stuck in my head.

Its awful
 
Yelled at my kids when the situation didn't really warrant the action.... don't do that so much anymore.. but have huge piles of guilt and shame over that.

Used our bedroom door as a punching bag... it now has a window..

Lied about being sick when I wasn't because I just couldn't deal with life anymore in that moment.

Cheated on my husband by having an emotional affair a few years ago.

Wanted to commit suicide several times.. made it so far once as pointing my own gun to my head.. but didn't because I decided that I don't want to perpetuate the violence and destroy my children's lives or my husbands.. besides if I did that my abuser would win.. and well.. I hate losing.
 
Yelled at my kids when the situation didn't really warrant the action
If it helps, I don't know a parent that wouldn't done that some day. It's how often & why you do it and how you react after that matters in my view.

Lied about being sick when I wasn't
If you 'couldn't deal with life', or basically was at the end of your rope? In my mind that counts as sick, that you didn't have other trouble on top non relevant. Mental health is real health.
 
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