Taking A Break From Here.

[Barberian]

I'm out. I've had it for now. I thought we were supposed to welcome new members. As I remember it, a lot of people show up here a mess, then either settle down or bug out. I know I showed up quite the mess. I've stuck around to hopefully help others as best I can. I understand the anger at the latest case. I'd get angry too if someone shit in my Wheaties.

I don't feel comfortable here right now. I don't have a whole lot to offer the site. I've tried to be helpful when I can. I've tried to play by Anthony's rules, who I respect greatly. I'm just bone tired of trying.

I won't be back any time soon to check any replies. I may check back in a month or two. Maybe my absence will make the place better, I certainly hope so. I will still be on the civie site most likely.

Best of luck to all in taming the beast.

 

[Jimmy1]

This always happens. Someone tries to join and starts shit happening and it snowballs.

Don't take things personally. We all have PTSD here which means we all get hot under the collar. If you need a break take it. It will do you good. I have done it.

Keep safe Barb

 

[BaMuoiBa]

No body knows you better than yourself, Barb, you'll know when the time is right.

We'll be here when your ready, in the mean time stay well and kick the beast in the nuts for me. :mad:

Good luck,

Ba

 

[combatgoldfish]

I know I could have handled it better and pre-maturely went off. Had a ptsd moment and lashed out because of what was said. Snowballed from there.

I normally don't say much here as I usually get what I need just reading what you guys say and experience. Let's me know I'm not alone when the war is still strong in my head.

I hope if ya decide to leave for a bit that your break goes well.

 

[JarHed]

Drama, glad I missed it.

Bar, do what you need to do for yourself. Hope to see ya' in the future.

Jar

 

[Spock]

Been wondering where you were Bar. Sorry to see you go.

We have a diverse group, older, younger, men, women from across the planet. Some of the guys are still learning the difference between being cocky with our buds at the unit versus being aggressive because it just feels good. Some of our Nam vets use their wisdom and are good at pointing out the cost, for that person.

I agree with Jar. I'm glad I missed the drama here too because it seems rampant at the present moment over the same topic. The Drama is highly annoying.

Breaks are good. I look forward to your return.
Well keep a cold one ready for ya brother...

 

[tnkg1rl]

Stay safe barbarian we will be here when you come back

 

[Raven]

Apparently I missed something.

Be well.

 

[vikingr12]

I missed it too apparently.

I understand the need to get away. Being an old 'Nam guy myself, I guess I look back on some of the discussions a bit differently, but somehow, after reflection, it resolves itself the same. We are all very much alike in many ways. I read some of the stories coming out of the latest conflicts (let's not call them wars or the politicians will bark at you) and it really brings up some old feelings that at times I would rather forget. But somehow I can't. And that's when, like you, I need to get away and take it in a little slower. It's not a full fledged trigger but it deepens depression that I have fought for a long time. Just admitting depression, took me years.

It's healthy. You can lose your Self in this forum. And find it, too.

 

[Sarg]

Seriously, a bump in the road and we motor on. I'm the exact opposite, Vike, I get wrapped up in things and my anxiety ramps up like crazy. Looking back, I think it became second nature to drop everything you're doing, put on a flight suit and start the preflight checklist. No difference than the EMT helicopter crews. Those guys are in the air in a minute. Just lost a crew last week.

Consequently, my anxiety, used to responding in minutes, is ramped up most of the time. I often wonder if I'm like that TV commercial selling motor oil and the car engines screaming at redline with no oil in them and wham, they seize up. I keep waiting to seize up.

Sarg

 

[vikingr12]

I was looking over some of the Jolly Green losses somebody posted and has passed on and on in other links. It's funny how incomplete or inaccurate data gets passed on the internet and people quote it as true.

There are big gaps in his log but I guess the aircraft inventory is one source and maybe he's right. I know some of the unit history is wrong. The dates are just later than they were. The logs don't show the ones that were successful and really rough. (It's funny how only officers are mentioned in the death column when the whole aircraft went up in flames. What happened to the crewmen? Magic.) If I don't laugh, I'll cry.

I was doing both rescue of downed crewmen and exfils (and some infils) of LRRP patrols. I went down there with them at times when we couldn't find people or they could not come to us (that's how I got hit), or someone just needed some more ammunition or another gun. Most of them are complete blanks. A big black hole when there were no pre-mission briefings to help you remember. And often we were diverted to pick someone else up going back "home."

Yes, Sarg, I know the rush. Sometimes the drugs (like hydocodone that I am taking now) actually contribute to it. It's like caffeine to me, not a sedative. It's really hard to slow down the mind.

 

[Sarg]

Wonder what my redline is...I got to looking at C-130 losses in Nam and it surprised me how many we lost. I want to say in the ballpark of 50-60. And too damn many of them them said "flew into mountain" or some such. Don't know if you guys did or not but we were supposed to have a very defined number of hours we could fly in any given time...shit...we exceeded that like, all the time.

I know there were times, I knew they were tired up front and some pretty strange maneuvers "happened". As you know, one only makes so many mistakes in the air.

Sometimes I ask myself how the hell I'm here.

Sarg