Left confused and so many unanswered questions

[KiwiNZ]

So here’s the thing, I was in a relationship for 4 years and in June last year I got broke up with via txt msg..with reasons of I don’t give enough of my time we talk more over the phone than we do in person..being the main reasons, now from June up until 3 days before Xmas we still talked caught up for dinners went to the movies etc even got each other Xmas presesnts..now when my ex turned up to exchange presents that was when I got the “we can’t talk or see each other anymore” talk all the while my ex was telling me this she was crying her eyes out and also told me there isn’t anyone else(I had been told this more than once) she left and contact ceased...so about a month ago I find out she was talking to someone online who lives in another country and that person had changed their relationship status to in a relationship status with her..since beginning of November! Which means they must’ve started talking virtually after we broke up...my ex hasn’t changed her relationship status and this new person is the complete opposite of me from looks to everything..I’m confused because you go from a 4 year relationship to someone else straight away who doesn’t live in the same country so I feel like the reason I got for being broken up with are a lie because now she’s with someone she can’t spend time with etc...

 

[Justmehere]

Do you have PTSD?

 

[EveHarrington]

It’s probably best to move on and not resume contact.

Easier said than done, but it will help you move forward.

Hugs.

 

[KiwiNZ]

Yep I know and I feel embarrassed that it still bugs me a fair bit, thank you though .

 

[Mytime]

You didn’t say who has PTSD, you or her?

 

[KiwiNZ]

I’d say it’s me seeing as I’m the one who is so confused by her leaping straight into an online relationship

 

[digger]

I’d say it’s me seeing as I’m the one who is so confused by her leaping straight into an online re...

Are you saying you think you might have PTSD from this? If so, I think you may be having some confusion over what PTSD is.

PTSD results from the following types of traumatic experience

DSM 5 Criteria A for PTSD
A. Exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence in one (or more) of the following ways:

Directly experiencing the traumatic event(s),
Witnessing, in person, the event(s) as it occurred to others,
Learning that the traumatic event(s) occurred to a close family member or close friend. In cases of actual or threatened death of a family member or friend, the event(s) must have been violent and accidental.
Experiencing repeated or extreme exposure to aversive details of the traumatic event(s) (e.g., first responders collecting human remains; police officers repeatedly exposed to details of child abuse).
Note: Criterion A4 does not apply to exposure to electronic media, television, movies, or pictures, unless the exposure is work related

That doesn't mean that you're not suffering or confused as a result of this break up, but if PTSD isn't in the mix, then there are probably other forums that are going to be better placed to support you through this, as the primary focus of this forum is PTSD.