General My world has imploded and I have an apology to make to those here who supported me.

[StFinley]

This will be a ramble but please bear with me. Mods, if this is in the wrong forum please move it, I don’t know where to post it as I got my advice in here.

You may remember I posted about my Marine Corps veteran and his PTSD, the way it affected him on Veterans Day weekend and some other things.

The bottom entirely fell out of my world on Wednesday, when his mother told me he had never been in the Marines. It was lies. It was stolen valor. I am devastated and destroyed.

I came back to tell you and to apologise to all those wonderful people who opened up and shared their own stories and advice with me about it. I won’t blame you for your anger because I would be pissed off too if I had spoken about these vulnerable issues your genuine veterans have only to find out it was part of someone’s sick fantasy.

I hope none of you ever have to go through it and I hope your own Veterans are doing well and being supported.

To anyone else who gets involved with a service man, ask for proof. Any serviceman worth their salt will be happy to show you that. I thought I had proof but it was all a facade.

Again, I am sorry to you all. I may be back in some capacity to receive support, but for now I need to clear my head and scrape up the shattered remains of my life, and to reclaim the huge part of me he has taken away from me.

 

[blackemerald1]

I'm so sorry you are going through this situation.

Just a quick query... can you absolutely trust his mother to tell the truth?

 

[Ronin]

He would not be the first one, StFinley...

His lies are his own. You being a wonderful person who tried to help someone else is you, and nothing to be sorry about. I am sorry he deceived you like that.

 

[Gs172003]

This will be a ramble but please bear with me. Mods, if this is in the wrong forum please move it, I don’t know where to post it as I got my advice in here.

You may remember I posted about my Marine Corps veteran and his PTSD, the way it affected him on Veterans Day weekend and some other things.

The bottom entirely fell out of my world on Wednesday, when his mother told me he had never been in the Marines. It was lies. It was stolen valor. I am devastated and destroyed.

I came back to tell you and to apologise to all those wonderful people who opened up and shared their own stories and advice with me about it. I won’t blame you for your anger because I would be pissed off too if I had spoken about these vulnerable issues your genuine veterans have only to find out it was part of someone’s sick fantasy.

I hope none of you ever have to go through it and I hope your own Veterans are doing well and being supported.

To anyone else who gets involved with a service man, ask for proof. Any serviceman worth their salt will be happy to show you that. I thought I had proof but it was all a facade.

Again, I am sorry to you all. I may be back in some capacity to receive support, but for now I need to clear my head and scrape up the shattered remains of my life, and to reclaim the huge part of me he has taken away from me.

Damn. I'm sorry.

 

[HealingInProcess]

This will be a ramble but please bear with me. Mods, if this is in the wrong forum please move it, I don’t know where to post it as I got my advice in here.

You may remember I posted about my Marine Corps veteran and his PTSD, the way it affected him on Veterans Day weekend and some other things.

The bottom entirely fell out of my world on Wednesday, when his mother told me he had never been in the Marines. It was lies. It was stolen valor. I am devastated and destroyed.

I came back to tell you and to apologise to all those wonderful people who opened up and shared their own stories and advice with me about it. I won’t blame you for your anger because I would be pissed off too if I had spoken about these vulnerable issues your genuine veterans have only to find out it was part of someone’s sick fantasy.

I hope none of you ever have to go through it and I hope your own Veterans are doing well and being supported.

To anyone else who gets involved with a service man, ask for proof. Any serviceman worth their salt will be happy to show you that. I thought I had proof but it was all a facade.

Again, I am sorry to you all. I may be back in some capacity to receive support, but for now I need to clear my head and scrape up the shattered remains of my life, and to reclaim the huge part of me he has taken away from me.

Don't see what you have to apologize for if you were the one who was deceived.

 

[Sweetpea76]

We’ve had supporters deceived by Stolen Valor before... it’s not your fault, it’s his.

 

[Freida]

As a vet with ptsd I can tell you that my supporters would say there is no need to apologize to them because you did nothing wrong. Stolen Valor is a huge problem but the blame lays on those who do it...not those who are fooled. My own sister got caught up with a guy doing it -- until I finally tripped him up enough times that he caved and told her the truth.

You did nothing wrong. You offered your heart to an asshat who took advantage of your lack of knowledge.
He is the one to blame.

 

[EveHarrington]

You didn’t do anything wrong.

You trusted the word of someone you cared about. From time to time we all get lied to.

No need to apologize.

:hug:

 

[bellbird]

You have done absolutely nothing wrong.
I'm so sorry for what you are going through.
We are here when you need us.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Wow! That's insane! I'm sorry! And you have zero to appologize for! He does!

 

[nursenurse]

Sounds like my story all over again, from 6 years ago. Mine went into such detail of his time in the marines, describing moments with such accuracy, he had to have been there. He was there, all right, in the movie theatre. After I found out about his ruse, I described his stories to his someone who had been in the military reserves. He had been describing movie scenes, Black Hawk Down was one of his favourites. I had seen it years before, but I don’t remember scenes from movies ever, other than from Ben Hur, I just remember liking movies or not. He knew every word, every moment from that movie. Big duh moment for me when I found out.

Time really does heal everything, and no one here will be less than kind and supportive, same as when I was hoodwinked. Learn from it. Look after yourself. You will be fine. Everyone here will be rooting for you. You can have the best time of your life, I promise.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

What a f*cked up thing to fake! That's all I gotta say! My dad gave me some clues to look for when someone says they are in the military. Some things to ask really fast. What branch? What rank? What Unit? There's a few others (if deployed over seas "what country, what city were you stationed") and then told me to search it all on the internet (which would of found the movies guy) but he always told me that these are things that you don't ever forget. He's from Nam era (Saigon) , is 76 and forgets a lot but he can answer them all within seconds still. I never knew why he gave me those tips. Maybe he knew about this faking business but never told me? Didn't want me to get wrapped up with someone faking? I dunno.