Recent content by lithium-mom

No I'm not, I don't know where to go for CBT or any therapy because technically I'm not even supposed to have insurance. Is CBT really helpful? What I mean by "technically I'm not supposed to have insurance" is I was on Tricare Prime, and I was supposed to be going to school full time to...

Hey Ron, I hear that's actually pretty common with medication. It makes you feel "good enough" to actually want to carry out your suicidal plan. I was unemployed with no income recently, and I had pretty much no money, the only reason I was okay was because I had somewhere to stay and someone...

content warning: talk of sex//pornography I'm not sure how to write this because since not living with my father, I have only vague recollections of what life was like with him. The recollections are sparse, but the memories of the feelings, smells and sensations are very strong. I still...

Sorry if this ends up being another long post but I'm just worried I'm not trying hard enough to survive what I'm doing right now. I don't know if I've looked into all my options. I've been trying to write out my memories of what's happened to me in the past but now that I'm away from most of...

She wanted to contact my mom before I signed a waiver, but later on she had me sign a waiver. I didn't know what to do but sign because it seemed like... I don't ever want to seem like I'm trying to be belligerent or a "problem patient" but I don't know why her first instinct after I say "these...

Yes, the nurse practitioner I'm supposed to be working with for medication.

So, I just need to map out what's in my head right now and I need reassurance that I never have to go back home again. I grew up with a father who psychologically and physically was very... aggressive and abusive. Very authoritarian and controlling. I moved out six months ago and I have no...

I spend a great deal of my day being anxious and/or depressed so I don't have a lot of time to be productive. My story I guess is irrelevant in this, but I do have pretty bad symptoms of mental illness in general. So I'm a creative person, or at least I'd like to be. But my brain is all...

Yes I am a classical pianist and I sing opera as well. Music isn't really a retreat for me, except maybe listening to it. It's mostly just trying to overcome the emptiness to go practice. Playing can be wonderful, but practice can be grueling. I am learning to enjoy it. The final product is very...

Well I have healthcare for about another year, but here where I live it's really hard to get a therapist/psychiatrist or anyone because it's very rural. You can get appointment once every three weeks and I need one at LEAST once a week. I'm a pianist! I'm a classical pianist and there is a very...

I have about until June 1st before I make it to Florida, though I might leave earlier just because I have no reason to be here after school ends May 4-5th. I don't have much money, and i'm not sure how i'm going to get the bus ticket to go there but i'm hoping everything will fall into place...

I have 2 general stories to talk about and they're both to do with my dad. I think there should be a trigger warning for what I'm about to talk about-- it's mostly just really weird and gives me a lot of anxiety. 1. My dad gave me the sex talk and talks about my period. My mother never did. He...

Any anti-psychotic that I've taken has made my suicidal ideation 1000X worse. :/

I'm really sorry you go through this. I go through basically the same thing. The thought of death and lack of doing anything ever again really calms me. Going back to therapy is a good idea, it doesn't help me much but I'm generally pretty hopeless in general. I like that you aren't going to...

My diagnosis is Bipolar 1 but I feel uncomfortable with that diagnosis-- and I AM experiencing rapid cycling. It's really awful. I was living with my family at the time of my Bipolar 1 diagnosis and am experiencing the same symptoms. It's very intense but also very cathartic to experience, I...