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Hi Joeylittle, you are so full of insight. Even before I read your last two sentences, I was thinking the same thing, that perhaps expressing this verbally, to his face is too difficult for you right now. It may be the best thing to do, asking him to read it. Asking for it, is not the worst kind...

Me too Gwhizz, when the processing gets tough I think of all the people less fortunate than me in the world and tell myself to man up and get grateful. Argh! To some extent that is true and then when I really think about it, it just perpetuates the negative beliefs I've accumulated along the...

Ah desiderata310, what does it mean? It means that you survived something horrendous. That you have been sidetracked by something else that made you remember that there was no hero there for you. I've felt that too before. I resent the people who could have and didn't valiantly defend my honour...

Hi RussH, I obviously haven't been with you as long as many of your online friends here, so I can't offer you much, however I felt that I really related to your question as I have been asking myself the same thing lately. Well....to cut a long story short, I woke up this morning hoping to...

Hi RussH, I have to leave for my first day at school shortly so I can't write a full response right now. It's such a valid question you ask that I'd like to give you my thoughts on later when I'm home. I can't say I know exactly who I am either but I do have some ideas that I will post later...

In the worst times of trauma that myself and my kids went through, we were not safe to leave the house. We would make cubby houses inside using all the furniture and blankets and sheets, then leave them set up that way for days at a time, sleeping inside them like tents. We would take food in...

My high school English teacher saved my life at a time when I was so troubled. I wasn't labelled with what is called complex trauma until my early forties and had childhood sexual abuse prior to age 5. My early life caused a great deal of damage to my personality formation. Miss Wallis, I love...

I'm hearing you Sunset. Perhaps there is someone like that, like an advocate who can come with you. An advocate is someone who has been a consumer of the MH system and is relatively well, enough to handle being your 'interpreter'. Usually hospitals or outpatient services have people like that...

Thanks Hashi, that all makes great sense. Even just starting CBT therapy again gives me about that ratio off post session 'landing'. My T says it's best not for me to do any EMDR with her just yet, I trust her judgement and I tend to agree too. It makes me feel good to hear you say the above...

Paidfor, congratulations on the joy of being pregnant first! Imho, we birth as we live. Our bodies do indeed hold and store body memories and you are right to be thinking of how your past will affect your body's letting go of your baby. I had 3 homebirths ala natural, no drugs etc after a...

Interesting data. I have often wondered why it is that women tend to suffer ptsd more than men. You would think evolution had primed us to handle trauma better because we give birth but apparently no, it hasn't. Or is it something inherent in being the physically and socially 'weaker' sex that...

Justmehere, I get it. After reading your reason for this big confrontation of injustice on your post the other day. That Argh you posted at the end, I have felt that many times. You believed and got knocked down. Can you still remember in all this that none of this was your fault? Maybe that's...

That's a brilliant insight Springer80, our emotional needs are not deficiencies. My childhood made it necessary for me to recognize them as a risk to have, let alone express. Forward decades to adult life, I went about interacting that way with the entire world.

Reading these comments scares me. Not that I'm blaming anyone, I'm grateful for reading everyone's stories but it feels so scary to face the long road I have ahead. How do you beautiful people do these therapies and manage to do normal life at the same time?

Hi Tealeaf, I'm sorry to hear that you are in such an emotionally unsafe relationship. It is no place for a trauma survivor to grow and heal. I'm currently trying to extricate myself from one right now. It's like living in a trigger zone 24/7. All people have aggression in them. It's the way we...

Hi kylebkyle, I've only just found this site recently too, it's great. Welcome :-)

FindingMyself88, … 'My T tells me all the time that the anxiety replaces the emotions' I don't know why, but no one has ever pointed that out to me, nor have I ever seen that for myself. Of course it does! It's not just us being afraid of the feelings, it's taking the place of them. Profound...

Hi I_am_me, welcome. :) Time for you now.

Oh Justmehere, that must feel awful. So not fair. When you mean sanctions do you mean that they don't accept students or do they require something else. It is Stigma when you hear something like eating disorder thrown in too. I work from home these days but when I worked outside the home, I...

Hello rm2883, I sense that you are an intelligent guy and that you must relate to the word trauma or flashback maybe, in order to have come on this site and ask the questions that you have. Am I right in that or not? What you have shared is a really sad and difficult thing to happen to a young...

Being a Mother, (I had four kids to care for, when I went through my adult life trauma and therapy), presents limitations to having cathartic demonstrations of pent up emotions. There is rarely the space needed to do it. Then the comfort to drop your bundle for a while to process what just...

This study makes sense and also raises questions for me. I know that sometimes my physical symptoms are caused by nightmares. Sometimes I will have none or very little tremor or low grade heart palpitations, then wake up from a nightmare and have strong tremors and what feels like anxiety, for a...

It's a really good question to ask 'What do I want in a relationship?'. I did this very thing about a month ago reading a self help book, that asked you to write it down. It asked, 'What does a safe relationship look like?' It said that relationships were both a den of pleasure and a...

Sorry Bill my bad, I interpreted what you were saying about curbing in the wrong context. I can really relate to being pissed at whoever is supposed to apparently, be moderating this world. I went through the exact same thing. I remember once riding down the highway on the back of a motorbike...

Joeylittle, I've been having a longer think about your thoughts around the issue of being complicit and the concept of being a child. These are my thoughts. I'm going to try my best not to use triggering words, please tell me if you need me to lower the tone of what I write. There is our...