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Makes sense to me. I've been through too many therapists to count. It started with a bad experience with a church based therapy group that really messed things up. After that it took a long time, and just the right circumstances, to be able to open up to therapist enough to do some work...

I just quit my job and moved. I go through times of believing it's the best decision, and other times of seeing it as a catastrophe. It's neither, of course. I think that is a great idea. Even though your feelings can change quickly, the written record can give your therapist something to...

Yay! I got post # 50! I know I'm probably beating a dead horse here, but here goes. I was cheated on. It was one of the most horrible experiences in my life. However, it wasn't the most horrible experience. I didn't dissociate over it. I don't have flashbacks. While its effect was...

I have 2 experiences, numbness and hyperawareness/anxiety. I'm looking for the place where I can tolerate who I am without going to extremes.

Every relationship I've been in has left it's mark, even those that were not traumatic. Its the traumatic one, of course that I'm here fore. I see my behavior and wonder, like you do. I feel ashamed, not so much because of my behavior, but because shame is pretty common after trauma.

I feel like I get so much b.s. from people on a social level. I don't feel like people are treating be like a child so much any more, but I felt like that for years. I know it's about me and not about the whole world. Still, I stay away from people, and I'm tired of being isolated. I want a...

I'm glad I could exceed your expectations.

I find myself seeking appreciation and acknowledgement often. Thanks for posting this. My mom is just the same.

Glad you're here. No 12 year old has the skills it takes to handle an alcoholic predator. Many adults don't have the skills either. You are right to focus on your sense of guilt. It's a good place to start. My grandparent was a non-alcoholic predator. My parent was an alcoholic predator...

Oh, yeah. Duh!

I hate having to leave. It's so triggering that I have stayed in jobs, houses, and relationships way past when I should have left. I moved upstate a few weeks ago. I spent 3 months researching my options, and that really helped. Very time consuming, like an obsession, but when I moved I was...

I'm interested to know what your intention was, the real, honest intention, if you can reach it. People get misunderstood for a lot of reasons. We don't always say what we intend, and often don't really know what we intend. Communicating well is difficult under normal circumstances, and for...

Glad you made it here. Welcome to the forum!

My memory about silly things can slip. I googled the name of that thing you put under your glass so that your furniture doesn't get those rings. Answer? Coasters. Duh. I've heard that part of the fight/flight/freeze response requires a loss of cognitive ability. If you are running from a bear...

What you said @Bellatrix, was just right. Glad you are here on the forum.

@imok I just tagged you! I can also quote you:

I just started with a new therapist. It was really hard to tell the basics all over again. And that was just the intake. Welcome to the forum!

I left one therapist last week, and it was the goodbye session. I am going to an intake tomorrow. It's worked out well. I wonder if your old therapist has some idea of etiquette about what happens when you get a new therapist. If so that's messed up. I don't like it when rules trump treating...

I've made significant recovery. So I come here because these are the people I relate to. We are all very different people. Some people don't seem to change much, some do. Either way, this PTSD stuff has been the biggest struggle of my life. Anyone who can even post in the middle of it...

I was told directly and indirectly not to tell anyone about what experienced with my mom and grandfather. I also had what I went through minimized. I minimized it myself. I didn't want to believe it. Tell a doctor the truth? Really? The threat might not be there anymore, but the...

Posting anonymously is about trust too. Do it until it makes sense not to. I can't do it. It feels too weird. It makes me feel like people will think less of me. That's not true, of course. I'm glad you can. Better post anonymously than be a stranger.

I've trusted a lot of therapists, some good, some so-so. That's really where I started learning to trust. When I finally ready to get honest (Panic attacks and flashbacks hit a new high and that drove me to get honest) I told my therapist I was afraid she would abuse me like my parents did. I...

I quit buying gifts for my family years ago. It's not that anyone is cruel about it. It's just that no one cares. Mother's day is coming up tomorrow here and I will give the obligatory call, but that's more for by brother's sake. He doesn't like it when I don't do the little rituals because...

Here's another simplistic idea. It could be that the hatred toward your grandmother masked the feelings about the trauma. Is that a possibility?

I had 2 traumatic incidences as an adult. Neither was directly life threatening. However, they were both tied to childhood abuse that was life threatening. These incidences triggered me, and I felt at the time that they were life threatening because of how they were connected to the childhood...