Is It Possible To Have Ptsd From Being Cheated On?

[RussH]

@FridayJones yes I agree with you, that answer regarding that anthony guy gave me the laugh I needed.

 

[Intrepid]

Yay! I got post # 50!

I know I'm probably beating a dead horse here, but here goes. I was cheated on. It was one of the most horrible experiences in my life. However, it wasn't the most horrible experience. I didn't dissociate over it. I don't have flashbacks. While its effect was significant (being really angry, hurt, and distrustful for a long time), it wasn't a cause of PTSD. But boy did it trigger me.

 

[Chava]

My sister has a Phd in psychology and I have a masters degree in it.

Well, okay then.

Psychology has changed a lot over the years.

In that we have diagnostic criteria for PTSD and understand the effects on the central nervous system, which set it apart from really bad feelings?

But with the changes our brains have made over the years and the evolution of our emotional and mental state, I promise you it is possible.

So we have "evolved" to become less stable and more easily traumatized? Hmm. Why do I feel like I'm most definitely not talking to a scientist?

:meh:

 

[anthony]

So we have "evolved" to become less stable and more easily traumatized? Hmm.

OMFG... :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

That was just priceless @Chava.

 

[PTSDSuffer]

Thank you very, very much for your answer. You're probably the first person that's explained things in such a clear way...

Leah dont listen to this man... You may very well have PTSD or Complex PTSD from your partner cheating you... I know this very well myself because i am suffering from your same symptoms only much worse... Anyone that has not experience such deep betrayal will have no idea what we are going through because it is not physical it is not measurable for them to see it so they wave everything away as being just to emotional or sensitive that we should just grow up and move on and time will heal all wounds... but the sad thing is time does not heal all wounds and will never will... I am struggling to find a way to survive to move on to live on after the very fabric of my heart, soul, mind, beliefs, and very existence was shattered to oblivion with no way back....

 

[The Albatross]

PTSD is not a merit badge... time and effort can heal wounds, betrayal is called adversity. It is NOT the same thing as PTSD.

[From Anthony on page 1 of this thread] "The actual criterion, as written exactly from the DSM V, is:

A. Exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence in one (or more) of the following ways:

1. Directly experiencing the traumatic event(s),
2. Witnessing, in person, the event(s) as it occurred to others,
3. Learning that the traumatic event(s) occurred to a close family member or close friend. In cases of actual or threatened death of a family member or friend, the event(s) must have been violent and accidental.
4. Experiencing repeated or extreme exposure to aversive details of the traumatic event(s) (e.g., first responders collecting human remains; police officers repeatedly exposed to details of child abuse).

You can read it at: Link Removed " (Post #19)

Related topic... quite a discussion about big T and little T traumas:

https://www.myptsd.com/threads/comparing-rape-to-being-cheated-on.31610/

 

[joeylittle]

I am struggling to find a way to survive to move on to live on after the very fabric of my heart, soul, mind, beliefs, and very existence was shattered to oblivion with no way back....

This is your pain. Your pain is real. Your grief is real. You are having profoundly difficult situational depression. Depression is real. It is a serious diagnosis all its own. PTSD is not the same as Depression.

No one is saying 'get over it'. Calling depression PTSD instead is like calling diabetes kidney failure instead.

Why people insist on doing that is beyond me.

 

[anthony]

Calling depression PTSD instead is like calling diabetes kidney failure instead.

Where is the 1000+ like button?

 

[Queen Boudica]

I am struggling to find a way to survive to move on to live on after the very fabric of my heart, soul, mind, beliefs, and very existence was shattered to oblivion with no way back

Of course there is a way back. That is utterly ridiculous. Men cheat all the time. You might have been unhealthily attached to this guy, but the very fabric of your heart, soul and mind and beliefs being shattered that is showing some very abnormal thinking about marriage. It happens all the time.

 

[Chava]

You may very well have PTSD or Complex PTSD from your partner cheating you... I know this very well myself because i am suffering from your same symptoms only much worse...

Self diagnosis is not usually helpful. Number one, this IS painful and the pain and suffering is valid. Time to heal might be very long. There might be feelings of disorientation and even unreality. And grieving and depression and anxiety. Yep. Does that make it PTSD or CPTSD? No. Unless it has triggered earlier trauma (criterion A trauma).

The important thing about NOT self-diagnosing is that if someone is suffering and not able to get back into their life or function in a way that is acceptable to them, it is important to seek real help...not an internet diagnosis based on symptoms. GET HELP or support, or a diagnosis if that would somehow designate a certain line of treatment (like depression fits well with certain forms of treatment, and for some people it fits for certain kinds of medication).

Saying that being cheated on or betrayal is not PTSD does not mean the suffering and pain isn't real. You can't just cherry pick a diagnosis based on your level of suffering. It doesn't work like that. For me, I suffered A LOT, physically and mentally, nearly killing myself, because of starvation. "Anorexia" wasn't really a wrong diagnosis, but getting diagnosed with PTSD and then treated through the lens of complex trauma (with a trauma specialist) after getting through the initial wave of weight restoration is what has helped me detach myself from the cycle of self denial and destruction.

I'm super f*cking serious about diagnosis, even knowing the process is imperfect...because understanding my issues as related to the real near-death and threatening experiences I lived earlier in life really has helped me make important changes. I searched for a better therapist after gaining a few pounds. I was f*cking serious about my suffering and finding a way out. If you are seriously suffering, to the point you think you have CPTSD, get off of google and the internet for a moment...you seriously deserve a chat with a professional. Leave the labels to them and go for the support and treatment.

 

[Neverthesame]

Leah dont listen to this man... You may very well have PTSD or Complex PTSD

You are the first person I have ever heard that has presumably a licence to practice psychiatry, that is not bound by the malpractice laws that normally prevent someone from diagnosing themselves, as well as other people over the internet.

i am suffering from your same symptoms only much worse

That is rather hypocritical of you, don't you think? You go on to say how none of us are able to understand anyone else's suffering. But yet you can claim to be much worse off than everyone else? Huh, amazing.

time will heal all wounds... but the sad thing is time does not heal all wounds and will never will.

For what you are describing, your actually probably correct about that. You probably would benefit from therapy though. It might give you the extra oomph needed to deal with your unpleasant feelings. Though I am afraid no one here is able to refer you to a psychologist. You'll have to go about that yourself.

On a final note. I don't understand why you want this. What do you think will happen if you get the long sought after ptsd merit badge of... I don't know what word. Honour? Misery?

Do you think that if you get the special diagnosis, you will be granted a free pass through life? That some bikini girl will knock on your door, carrying a big cheque? Fraid' not.

Will it grant you the ability to give up on life, and give you free audience to whine about your problems? Without expectation of you to help yourself? Or that some fairy princess will come down from on high, feed, clothe and cook for you? Nope.

You know what will happen? f*ck all. Yup, not even kidding.

Only now, you have a label. One that tells most people to be afraid of you, because you might shoot up the place. Or it tells them that you are a worthless failure. Not even worthy of pity.

Very few people out there in the big bad world give a shit. Still want the pretty label?

Did you bother to read anything on this site? Did you see how the the people here who meet the criteria for diagnosis of PTSD, have not received their free pass?

How many of them struggle, day in and day out, to make ends meet? How many have spent long Hard years, struggling with agonizing pain, both physical and mental. In therapy, getting worse before they get better, in a grueling uphill battle against themselves, in the hope of maybe being able to hold a shitty job. Of having something in their lives they can call an accomplishment. Did you read any of that stuff?

I don't see a lot of whining here. I see struggle, fear, and effort. A lot of hard work being done, by people whose minds are screaming at them to just give up and quit.

Perhaps you should do some reading here, before you claim that we are some elitist club full of malingering pity cases.

Extremely rude thing to have done PTSDSuffer, Sir or Madame. Very rude indeed.

 

[Chava]

p.s. this sort of thread and validation of betrayal cptsd bothers me, not because it's not horrid suffering, but because it's f*cking misinformation. YES, your suffering and stabbing pain is valid. I wouldn't even say it's less worse than complex trauma (like my life support breathing tubes a couple times as a kid, chronic physical abuse, and possible sexual abuse by a parent which I can't go into). It's just DIFFERENT. Trauma fundamentally disrupts the nervous system. This betrayal type of trauma disrupts sense of self. The grieving is similar, yet different. The recovery is long, yet I'm pretty sure...LESS LONG. If google diagnosing via the internet feels helpful in that in validation feels supportive, I'd suggest finding a counselor or therapist and having your suffering validated that way. Your suffering, if you have been cheated on or betrayed IS VALID. It does NOT need to be f*cking complex trauma (like your parent molesting you for years, putting their fingers in your or having you play with their dick) in order to be super f*cking valid suffering.

Have compassion for your own suffering. If you feel like you need some sort of diagnosis to validate your suffering, I wonder if what you really need is just another human connection to validate your suffering. Please consider counseling. Human connection, support or counseling, is much stronger than a Google search diagnosis. If you want to think in terms of extreme suffering...cancer patients suffer extremely. Schizophrenics suffer extremely. Sufferers of molestation or chronic trauma suffer extremely. Victims of betrayal suffer too, extremely, and there is no invalidation of that suffering anywhere as far as I can tell. Is in PTSD? Probably NOT. THANK GOD, be grateful and accept legitimate help for your depression, anxiety, and feelings of unreality and confusion. And in time, life goes on. But trust your central nervous system is not fundamentally f*cked up.

:):confused: