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  1. P

    Extreme Reactivity

    So, what amounts to extreme reactivity for me, at least, has me very upset about myself. I honestly don't know what's a flashback and what's just reactivity. J thinks I'm being manipulative. I'm not manipulating on purpose. I am having really bad avoidance patterns. I mostly dissociate. I...
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    Songs You Relate To

    Genius Next Door by Regina Spektor Some said the local lake had been enchanted Others said it must have been the weather The neighbors were trying to keep it quiet But I swear that I could hear the laughter So they jokingly nicknamed it the porridge Cause overnight that lake had turned as thick...
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    Sufferer Coping But Not Living

    Welcome. Glad you are here pj
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    Taking Space

    This space thing sucks. It's confusing and even when I try to do this in healthy ways I can't figure out how to feel about it, I end up feeling guilty for going to see a friend. I don't think that's him making me feel that way, I'm just too confused about my own needs and there's so much...
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    Songs You Relate To

    I have an auditory processing issue so when I listen to music with words I don't usually hear the lyrics well enough to really get them. Only music that's really clear and without a lot of background music. I appreciate this thread. I like dark and sad music too. It's like it clarifies what I'm...
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    Sufferer Just Found This Site, Childhood Abuse And Drug Addiction. Hello Fellow Human Beings.

    Welcome. I like your username a lot. Just Keep Swimming. Or sometimes we're treading water, but then we can get swimming again. This is a good place, hope you get good things out of it. Peace, pj
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    Asking...ok...begging For Guidance/opinions.

    The martial arts seems key. Initially I was going to suggest that perhaps it was better if he were able to access medical marijuana in a state that allows it, that some strains are certainly much more potent, or have different effects like increased anxiety or paranoia, but that some really do...
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    Yoga As Pain Management For PTSD

    Right :) I wasn't disparaging the magazine or the models, but rather trying to suggest that some people may feel daunted by the perfect postures in the magazine, thinking they can't do it because they aren't flexible enough. It's great if you can look at the models with hope. I think many of the...
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    Yoga As Pain Management For PTSD

    Thanks @Ayesha for pushing the article back to the top. I'm slowly trying to get back to yoga. I do it sporadically. One of the things I have found most beneficial with yoga is the self-acceptance that comes from allowing myself to be right where I am, just stretching or exerting until I can...
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    Wilderness Quests

    I did a solo backpacking overnight last year. I definitely didn't do a 'survival' trip in the sense that I had a lot of gear, and our gear isn't ultralight or anything. But it was the Monday of Columbus Day weekend here (the last day of New England recreation season). I checked in with the...
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    ED Ptsd & eating disorders

    Is there orange juice, or anything that you can grab to give yourself a bit of a boost before dinner? I've definitely had those days, including the inability to do stuff in the kitchen if someone else is in there. Even if people are in the kitchen, it should be ok to grab something, right? I...
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    Parents Treating Me Like I'm Well

    Maybe she bit into her donut and realised there indeed WAS jelly inside. In seriousness, it is a pretty big thing that she said those things. Like The Albatross said, old behavioural patterns are sticky. Like jelly donuts. (Thanks MAS you made me want donuts) Wonder if you could tell her you...
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    How Did You Sleep Last Night?

    Slept, a while, but with a really vivid intensely bad dream last night. The level of messed upness of this dream was like a 7 on the Richter Scale.
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    Starting To Get Afraid Of People Again

    I pulled out this couple of sentences because I'm wondering if you can say anything about what the reasons are that you have no control over? There are judgmental and mean people in the world, although not everyone is, and I know that the ways I feel about myself influence how I carry myself...
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    ED Ptsd & eating disorders

    MD, just in case (it is for me, anyway), if a pharmacy is more convenient, those meal drinks are available there. Since they're used in a variety of settings. In the nutritional supplements aisle, rather than the food section. Just holding onto anything is something. Hang in there.
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    What *is* Effective For Complex/childhood Ptsd?

    I want this to be @Jemini 's thread so I'm again, going to just say thank you to all for responding. The info is helpful. (edited to add: I'm Jemini's spouse, and right now am calling a local resource on his behalf because he's not feeling well enough to make the call himself. Lest anyone think...
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    ED Ptsd & eating disorders

    I didn't feel like you were hijacking the thread. What you said, @MissAntiSunshine was helpful. So was @Abstract -- yeah, it's scary and I feel all kinds of swirling emotions but I duno. The ED clinic that was in the teen crisis unit when I was 15, was back in the 90s. The latest hospital stay...
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    What *is* Effective For Complex/childhood Ptsd?

    Hi @radicalgratitude , by parts work do you mean IFS - Integrated Family Systems therapy? I came across a therapist who works this way, and curious. It might be a good fit for J at this point. Or me. For those who did ITT, were you from out of town? (Not trying to find out where you live, but...
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    ED Ptsd & eating disorders

    This. Yes. I feel like I'm swinging back and forth between being able to and completely helpless. Ramen noodles at least are easy and give me sodium. I started learning how to put stuff in it to make it healthier, but in a pinch, wheat noodles with flavour packet does it. It's totally...
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    Parents Treating Me Like I'm Well

    So sorry that you live in invalidationville. OMG it sucks there. What J and I have both learned is that it's impossible to tell an invalidating person that they are being invalidating. They just invalidate it, and then don't understand when you say, "Ya SEE??!?" Nope, nope, they don't see it...
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    ED Ptsd & eating disorders

    Thank you, Abstract. I really appreciate your response here. If it seems better to take it to a different thread, maybe we can do that. I will answer a few things here for now. I don't remember my eating being controlled at the hospital when I was 15. However, in my last inpatient stay, a big...
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    Internal Family System Therapy

    <bump> I'm interested in this, found a therapist who is using IFS. There are a number of potential benefits to this person (multiple hats), but in terms of psychotherapy, this is their method. I just googled it and looked at wikipedia. Trying to read up on it some. Either for J or for me.
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    Relationship Finding Myself On The Other Side Of The Fence, Needing Advice

    Agreed too, blackemerald said a few things I really agree with, about not telling her anything and letting her experience it, see how she reacts. You got through it, she may or may not, but that isn't your responsibility. It sounds like boundaries could be an issue for this person, but it's...
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    Parents Treating Me Like I'm Well

    I was also a highly obedient child. I started figuring out that I probably was emotionally punished for being angry, even before I could speak. And that played out yet again the other day on the phone. I was trying to tell my mother how much suffering I'm going through, how I have problems and I...
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