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bit to late now though I had a big diva strop and ignored her

possibly I took it the wrong way but hey I have ptsd....were the experts at taking things the wrong way.

look darling I do not know what your getting worked up about I was just expressing my self as we all have the right to here I am going to click on unfollow from you now.

well it was an open conversation

I work today some people started talking about murder trials in books and tv it all sounded so exciting. I got so overwhelmingly triggered it was all going through my mind. I decided to just make a mockery of it and I turned around and said murder trials are quite boring they just speak in a...

What I have come to realise that the mother energy needs to come from within and not from the outside. I have fallen into many codependent relationships with very idealised mother figures..no good ever comes of it..I am just in the process of disengaging from another one of these...

not trust that anybody who is not taking care of them selfs will be able to take care of me rather.

Today I shall begin to liberate my self..I shall begin to.. Stop Feeling guilty for making the right choices and thriving as a result. Stop Failing to remember I was the one most in need. Let myself be angry with and dislike those whos choices are adversly affecting me. Walk away from...

I really sympathise. Christmas itself its just a date in the calendar but the very powerful hold it can have on us emotionally the years and years of accumulated bad memories.It is very painful...I like the way you got all the reasons why you hate it of your chest. I must identify myself the...

Yes I think the issue to in abusive family systems is that there was no environment when you was young were healthy attachment was possible so often trying to form relationships in adult life feels to little to late.

well you mentioned the people you hurt are supporting you now then they must understand that you was in pain.

Thats ok we need all the support we can find in this business I do not begrudge it.

Yes indeed i am well aware all familys have problems even ones which are not nessacarily abusive...and there are various degrees of dysfunctionality. Trust me when I say Mine is high end dysfucnctional..being threataned with physical violence last year was the last straw for me.My neices and...

Yes for me the way I have been changing big time is around setting boundaries and asserting my wants and needs..one family member reacted quite aggressively to me setting a boundary. yes familys can be very tyrannical.

yes I do not believe I have always been perfect either. Ive always felt like the different one in my family as I just did not think and believe the same things..and yes I think its a big problem when you are changing and they do no nessacarily want you to even though they say there happy for you...

Yes I relate to this tendency for some people to only relate to you on a certain level . In my family it tends to just revlolve around gossiping about other family member and the past...But all the simple everyday things all the things which makes relationships fun just is not there.

The question I ask myself during these times is . Who is my family then.

we despratly want are familys to be ok good enough sane people it so hard learning to accept that sometimes they just aint and just because were trying to get better does not mean they are as well.

yes I know what you mean as we speak I am descending into a pit of learned helplessness about the situation

indeed were all here to help each other.

can anyone help .To try and love my family is to just feel pain. This year tried building a relationship with my sister. It was so far so good we spent some nice time together. Then it all went down hill quickly. She phoned a couple of times to tell me she had something to tell me but she would...

I feel ready to tell the story of priory road , anfield , liverpool. I dreamt I was there again last night it was so realistic for a moment i thought i really was. its strange though i only spent a couple of weeks of my whole life there. but the place has a hold on me. It seems a part of me has...

What he did to you was not acceptable in anyway at all. but you must have a great heart for having some commpassion for what he went through. dont let go of that commpassion but acknowledge your anger aswell.

I was not sexually abused but I can relate to this dynamic of a parent having different behaviours for different children..for instance my father never physically abused me but he physically abused my brother. He tended to physically and emotionally neglect me. my sister was the golden child he...