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  1. I

    Overcoming learned helplessness?

    I'd like to talk about learned helplessness and how to overcome/manage it. Personally I find learned helplessness is a core issue, I feel it ties itself in with toxic shame and guilt. It can as many here may have experienced rob many aspects of one's personal growth. Career, relationships...
  2. I

    What kind of flashbacks do you get?

    Really good writing, I enjoyed that and could highly relate. I've always found dissociating to be a deep odd peacefulness, one I'd rather avoid but there is a sort of quietness that comes with it.. Depending on the environment. Please share more when you have any, thanks.
  3. I

    When is there rest?

    I'm not sure if I or this body can cope with this much longer.. I feel totally drained. My body is a mess: 90% of the time IBS flare ups, Fibro aches and weakness, total fatigue where I just want to sleep but my mind is stressed, I feel like a puffed up Michelin man! I'm getting crash after...
  4. I

    Withdrawing from / avoiding relationships..

    My biggest avoidance feature is by far relationships. I don't feel able to trust people, it's like I'm waiting for some form of abuse to manifest at any given moment. Even though I'm aware of this it doesn't make it any easier to want to make friends.. I would like people to hang with but the...
  5. I

    Relationship Is this forever?

    It's such a difficult one isn't it. I honestly don't know how my partner has managed to stay with me.. From my point of view it came to a very definite point where I realised I was going to lose the girl I love if I don't a) get myself together as best I can and b) show her the respect she...
  6. I

    Family

    Sounds very similar to my experience. I've been trying to open the communication regarding the elephants in the room but they deny its existence or sometimes even acknowledge the issues but minimize or choose ignorance. I find this extremely damaging to be honest as the abuse I went through a...
  7. I

    Here we go again...anyone else tried mirtazapine for insomnia?

    I've come off the medication for now and I feel a lot better. Maybe I'll try the medication at a later date when my living environment is safer and I'll ask to change the dosage to a less drowsiness type. Chris was it helping with sleep at 30mg? I've read that 15mg tends to be used for...
  8. I

    Here we go again...anyone else tried mirtazapine for insomnia?

    Can I ask what dosage you were on? I hear 30mg has less of a sedating effect. I'm feeling better now. I'll talk to my GP tomorrow about the dosages as I don't feel it's safe for me to stay on 15mg.. Today I was in a total suicidal haze at one point where things felt very mechanical and a dull...
  9. I

    Here we go again...anyone else tried mirtazapine for insomnia?

    For the past month I haven't fallen into a dark depression however the past 3 days I have. Party due to family stress, invalidation of abuse, beginning a new medication for sleep. I tend to fall into suicidal realms around 2 times a month however this time feels a bit more hopeless. That dark...
  10. I

    Family

    Yes very much so it's taken time for me to recognise this.. I was neglected by both parents, emotionally abused by one and sexually abused by a sibling.. I've had to crawl through a lot of denial to recognise that yes they do trigger me and always have it's just I ignored it by denying it...
  11. I

    What kind of flashbacks do you get?

    Did anything proceed them? These sound like the flashbacks I was getting shortly after I had opened a big part of me that required addressing. I had denied that I was sexually abused for so long, I was in total denial to the point that I truly believed I was making up my story.. My emotions...
  12. I

    What kind of flashbacks do you get?

    I found the book extremely helpful and helped me to understand myself massively. I agree it seems private options are the only options accomidate CPTSD much better. The UK national health service has Complex PTSD on its online website of diagnoses however they don't appear to know how to...
  13. I

    Anyone else struggle with hating or blaming their abusers?

    Wise words.Thanks as you put the light on my own tendency to other empathise with others while sacrificing my own self. Its something I'm constantly trying to balance. Very testing while living around people that abused me and people that invalidate me. I've found inner child work to help and...
  14. I

    Disability uk

    I recently applied the process is slower than I thought, and I may even be called to workshops (where they practice interviews) and set up interviews for you which you must attend. This all depends on your assessment, I'm being processed as PTSD and my gp and counsellor are new to me but appear...
  15. I

    What kind of flashbacks do you get?

    This is really insightful thank you! I have never heard of HALT but thinking of all the times I have been very stressed those signals have been there.. It relates highly to my arousal symptoms.. Very useful to look out for thanks. Your so right about doing for others, sometimes I forget how...
  16. I

    Ashwaghanda- can anyone tell me more/

    I used it for two months.. It's a common epigenetic in India. Use for two months max and then stop for 2 months. 1 tablet a day is helpful. It may help with digestion, anxiety and especially stress. The great benefits are that it's long lasting, I was told by an Indian ayervedic practitioner...
  17. I

    What kind of flashbacks do you get?

    I've recently felt invalidated by many health care professionals that appear to lack awareness in Complex PTSD. In the past I had a period of flashbacks (visual whereby I retrieved memories I never knew I had and the accompanying feelings of terror) and then followed with intense panic...
  18. I

    When is it time to cut family ties?

    Thank you all for your helpful responses. I truly appreciate the replies. They validate that I am not going crazy, sometimes I feel a part of a twisted nightmare and then I explain the fundamental facts to others and they become a third person that is able to help me see clearly. From what I...
  19. I

    When is it time to cut family ties?

    Yes I'm currently living with a sibling that sexually abused me and then there's my father that witnessed the abuse, stopped it however told me to keep it quiet and never speak of it. My father never told my mother of the abuse so I grew up feeling emotionally neglected by both parents. Since...
  20. I

    Tired of pretending to be okay around my family

    Emotional abuse or neglect can be very invalidating of a persons sense of self. My family is exactly the same.. Recognition of depression is fine.. I'm just 'one of those' who gets it.. However whenever discussion is focused around PTSD aspects it gets ignored. I feel a sense of guilt on their...
  21. I

    When is it time to cut family ties?

    I came 'home' from another country to seek to mend a dysfunctional family. After receiving treatment and having a good understanding of my family history and a grasp on what it takes to heal, I thought I could make it manifest. I had a dream that we could all bring up our differences, drop the...
  22. I

    What are your personal epiphanies?

    One of my draw dropping moments was during therapy it suddenly dawned on me that my anxiety could never control what was about to happen next (e.g. anxiety before speaking to a person).. I always held on to wanting to have all the solutions and variables in my head beforehand so I could have a...
  23. I

    Parents not validating your diagnosis or past traumas

    Thanks all for the support. Yes it was childhood abuse within the family and then parental neglect whereby I was abandoned. (Which is why I get so frustrated and then anger if I don't catch the trigger in time). As many people here that tends to be one trauma of many Ts and further little Ts...
  24. I

    Parents not validating your diagnosis or past traumas

    I've recently returned home to my family to focus on stabilising, I've been here for 2 months now and on my first week I explained to my Mother about my CPTSD diagnosis and how I need support right now so I can focus on getting well and moving my life in the direction of healing and moving on...
  25. I

    Bipolar Distinguishing bipolar from cptsd..

    My moods fluctuate a lot.. I can be depressed with negative focus on my life circumstances and then two hours later content socialising but dissociated (present but not really engaged).. Then in the evening I may appear more upbeat.. I wouldn't ever say I appear Manic, hypomania possibly.. I do...
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