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Welcome to the forum. You are right that now it is your turn to seek the help, which you so deserve and you are so welcome here and I hope you find the support and friendship which you deserve and can help you through. God bless Helen

I am so sorry to hear the experiences you have been through. The "Chrisian beating" you talk about I find so heart wrenching. I believe that God is a God of love and grace and mercy, and that though He can not intervene and take all the hurt away, because we live in a fallen world he does...

Sorry to hear you were having a bad night. I would always say that being more run down for whatever reason would make me find things harder. I remember over the summer when things got particularly hard for me and it was one last thing which topped it all off for me, and my GP made the comment...

I find your post very interesting. When I was at Ellel last week having ministry I realised that the little girl inside me I had thrown into a 'dungeon' and inside this dungeon was along with the hurt and pain of this little child, which I just did not know how to deal with, was all the bad...

Not sad. Real. And that is important. Helen

I am so glad to hear you have been able to be so supported and honest within your work place, and really hope this will help you greatly with your anxiety. You have done so well to be so honest and real and ultimately really believe that being able to be as real as we can within safe...

I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling so much with your identity at the moment. I know for myself that my biggest fear has always been that I would become like my mother and always said that if I did become like her I would kill myself, which I know sounds very extreme, but it really has...

Russ - My like for your post was not that I liked the fact that you were tearing up, but that I am glad that you really did know that I meant what I said, and hope you are truly able to be blessed by it. Helen

I agree that it is crazy stuff. I know so well that when it comes to anyone else at all, that they really do deserve it, but do still find it so hard for myself. I agree that the gradual process of healing does start to change things, but know that receiving this gift and all the time and...

Btw Russ, you also really deserve the genuine heart felt gesture and smile, and as much as you can on a forum am sending you one now. Helen

I think that your heart really shines through with your attitude in this. It is good that you do not want them to get hurt, but at the same time it is important that you no longer get hurt, and they do have to take responsibility for their actions and realise when they have hurt others too...

Thank you so much Russ.

You do not need to be sorry for being angry. What you are going through must be hurting you so much and I am sorry for how hard it must be. I am praying that everything will be able to come out in the open and that everything will be revealed and am so thankful that your supervisor is so...

I have just spent that last few days at Ellel, and it has been an emotional and pretty hard few days, and at the end one of the ladies who has been supporting me and giving so much to me told me she had made a present for me. She had made a box with a pair of woollen socks in, which she had made...

I am so sorry to hear how hard things are for you - especially when you were finding it so hard socially at work anyhow. From what you have said it sounds like in many ways you just want to shut down and not have to face these people, but I would really encourage you that they are not all like...

I am sorry to hear that it is so hard for you and really feel for you in this situation. As others have said I know you have said she is just your therapist, but the relationship you have is one of such great value, where the little girl in you obviously feels safe and it is totally natural for...

The other thing I really like about that part of the psalm is that I have heard that preparing a table in the presence of our enemy's is one thing which the Israelites literally used to do to show that they were in covenant with the person they were eating with and they used to do it in full...

I have also just received my reminder letter and as you do feel very anxious about it at the moment. My mum died of cancer, so I do feel it is important for me to have it, but at the stage I am at in processing all of my past abuse at the moment, I really am not sure if I will be able to deal...

I'm sure He will along with His full armour (Ephesians 6). And remember that the God of angel armies is on our side and He has already defeated it all. God bless Helen

As I read your post a couple of things came to mind. One is that perfect love casts out all fear. I do not know if you use imagery at all to help you in these situations, but know Jesus will be there with you through it all, and am praying you can really connect with the safety which He offers...

Have you told him that you think he has a fair point about the car? I think it is very hard for people who have not been in that place to really understand and know that for me driving when I am I that place is just one of the things which I know is not safe, and for that reason my husband...

With a response like that from her mother it is no wonder she feels as she does. I always believe that the thing which does the most damage is not the event itself but the ongoing things it teaches us about ourself which we take on because of what we have experienced and the experience and way...

Again I would reiterate that showing her that you care and that it does matter can only help her in the long run. I know that for me when I have to face the things which really happened I often feel like it is my fault and feel so bad about it all, and have recently realised that for me it is a...

Just as an additional thing. I know that when I am going through such a hard time the thing I need to know most is that I am safe now and if you can help her feel that and speak to her saying that when she is in such a hard place words of reassurance I would hope that that will also be able to...

I am sorry to hear that things are so hard for her at the moment. I know you said you cannot force her to get help, and that is right but being alongside to support her and demonstrate her worth through your love and concern I really believe can help her. Until she is ready to face the issues...