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  1. L

    News Hoarding & Ptsd. A Discussion About Media.

    Well, I agree it maybe doesn't obviously fit the criteria, but maybe keeping a child in those conditions could be considered a form of neglect/abuse?
  2. L

    Guilty because i can't get over it

    I have just started work on self-compassion, sometimes I am able to have it and sometimes not. It's a new concept!
  3. L

    Guilty because i can't get over it

    Does anyone feel guilty they can't "get over it," whether "it" is a trauma, a relationship, an obsession, an "issue"? I feel like a loser because of the amount of time and mental energy I spend stuck in traumas and in the past--I feel like maybe I am feeling sorry for myself, but it doesn't seem...
  4. L

    General Psychotic Break (please Describe)

    If the post that you read it in was mine, I want to clarify that I am bipolar and my psychotic break was related to that as well as trauma issues. If that reassures you. Which is not to say that psychosis can't be part of PTSD.
  5. L

    Holding Onto Pain After A Death

    It seems like you are keeping yourself chained to despair out of this guilt, as you said. The way you're living now is painful but the guilt would get even worse if you let yourself move on. If you feel dead too, that is a way of feeling less guilty. So I think your mind feels it is the better...
  6. L

    It Is Just Way Too Much!

    I am glad it was helpful :)
  7. L

    It Is Just Way Too Much!

    I have felt the same frustration. I think the first step is getting rid of the idea of "normal." We think everyone else is enjoying their lives, everyone else is "normal," but we have no idea what it is like inside their heads. Some people are able to hide their issues better than others. As for...
  8. L

    Geodon, Anyone? Experiences Good, Bad, Foggy, Hallucinogenic?

    Geodon made me agitated and suicidal after a while of taking it. I got a side affect called akathesia. Not a fan. Also: sometimes anti-psychotics can make you sort of, well, psychotic.
  9. L

    A Different Perspective On Flashbacks

    I like that perspective. Another thing that helps me not beat myself up when I am having anxiety is asking myself whether I would have compassion if it were another person who was going through the anxiety. Of course the answer is yes, so why not be compassionate to myself? We are usually much...
  10. L

    Sadness Of A Life Spent In Dissociation

    That is a good point, about thinking of dissociation as a protector. (Something I try to remind myself to do.) Without it I might have been in a much worse state, agreed.
  11. L

    Sadness Of A Life Spent In Dissociation

    As my depersonalization has moments of weakening I find myself sad at what I have lost to dissociation...basically i have not really experienced my life. It has been hard to feel love, joy, happiness, even the sadness is something I miss, because that means you're alive. The good part is my...
  12. L

    Can Commitment And Relationships Be A Phobia?

    With me I will not only push away romance but also friends. It is like I want to reject them before they reject me.
  13. L

    Can Commitment And Relationships Be A Phobia?

    Well, just know that you are not alone. I am in my late 20s and have never been in a relationship. When you're in survival mode it is hard to focus on relationships.
  14. L

    Re Birth.

    I am really happy for you. Part of me also "died" in therapy. While I don't know your exact situation, it must be wonderful to start feeling more whole.
  15. L

    Who Else Lives In The Fog?

    Thanks Abstract and Movin' On. Abstract, I have found mindfulness to make a big difference too. It brings you into the present which is kind of the opposite of what dissociation does. Movin' on I am glad your dog is so helpful. I am finding that I also have to constantly bring myself to the...
  16. L

    Who Else Lives In The Fog?

    As you might guess from my name, I have almost constant depersonalization and derealization. I have been in the fog since I was 13 and I am 27 now. I think I have achieved so little in my life because, um, i haven't really been in my life. A robot-me had been going through the motions, sometimes...
  17. L

    When You Experience Suicidal Ideation.

    To cdg---I wonder if you are having interdose withdrawals from the Ativan. (I am on it too.) It only stays in your system for so many hours (4? 12? Something short) so you may be waking up in withdrawal after a night without it. That could account for your physical and mental symptoms.
  18. L

    When You Experience Suicidal Ideation.

    Yes, they do subside, sometimes when you least expect it. Take this from someone coming out of a fourteen-year long death wish. Depression tells you that you will aways feel that way, but it is a lie. What is helping me is exercise, garlic, (It's an antidepressant!) mindfulness, meditation...
  19. L

    Talking Trauma With Therapist.

    I think there can be an inherent loss of dignity in the therapy room, and you have to balance the sessions in a way that that vulnerability doesn't overwhelm your nervous system. Yes, I feel the same way in therapy sometimes.
  20. L

    Healing...or Dissociation?

    Thanks for the responses everyone. I agree, when I type it out it does sound like dissociation. And Pietro, it was frightening, but I have mental health issues in addition to PTSD that probably were/are contributing.
  21. L

    Apathy And Lack Of Motivation

    Major, major problem with this on my end. For me it seems to have to do with how shut down and dissociated I am, also maybe with PTSD-induced difficulty concentrating. I feel like everything inside me is slowed down, so where someone else could say, clean the bathroom in half an hour, it takes...
  22. L

    Healing...or Dissociation?

    A while back I was talking about a trauma with a therapist. It was very intense, I had intense feelings of terror and shame, and yet it was exhilarating, and change was happening very fast. She was not doing any relaxation or grounding work with me, and also I did not feel truly comfortable...
  23. L

    False Ptsd?

    Thanks for your replies everyone. I have been told I have PTSD by a couple of therapists, so I guess I have been diagnosed. I have been seeing a therapist who is good with trauma and is helping me. Paz, I really really relate to your post--with the secondary PTSD stuff I feel like I don't...
  24. L

    Talking Trauma With Therapist.

    * fear-ridden*
  25. L

    Talking Trauma With Therapist.

    Hi Honeyflower, I have been there and I think most of us on this forum have. My advice would be to make sure you trust your therapist, make sure to go at a pace which is somewhat comfortable for you, and make sure you and your therapist are doing grounding/relaxation work so you have techniques...
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