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Thanks for your share, its comforting to realize there are others that have this seamingly quagmire of a situation in their lives, damned if you do, damned if you dont. My girlfriend last night asked me a question I coukdnt answer. She asked me when was the last time I had experienced peace of...

Your share reminds me of how easily we hand our power over to another person, I mean I nearly committed suicide at 22 because of a failed or broken relationship. The feeling of being rejected and abandoned was like reliving my childhood years again, it was more than I could handle.

Thanks for your post, From my abusive childhood past, and from my studies, when their is broken intimacy in a childs development, which it sounds to be the case for both of us, it creates these problems in our adult life, In other words, the concempt of trust was never apart of our developmental...

Do we have a say? Well I suppose we can say whatever we want, but does it or will it make any difference? I suppose that's a very relative issue really. I believe you might have a chance today in your life to say something, some small little thing to someone whose hurting or full of fear, or...

thank you for responding and your support

It's probably a old defensive or survival behavior that fit a previous time frame in your life, but now it's really out of place, at least your aware of it now and can talk it through with other's and get viable alternatives and options besides what you've previously been doing

Sounds like your dealing with the situation and circumstances in a very professional manner, and taking back the power, that previously you might so freely have given away to others.

Thanks, I've been dealing lately with alot of self hatred, self loathing and to be honest, I don't feel alive emotionally, I feel completely numb, completely withdrawn from being close to anyone, walling myself in, in this put of inner shit, going around and around in my own head, hurting those...

just speaking for myself, I believe that's because basic boundaries were violated when I was a kid, and as a kid we had to deal with it, or accept it, what else were our options, but now as adults we don't have to allow others to violate our boundaries, but we have to define ourselves first in...

If you do involve your boss, chances are your not the first employee he's heard similar complaints such as these, from other women working there, I doubt it's a isolated problem just to you, good luck hope the situations improves for you

Maybe that's the problem, maybe you need to piss some people off, it's a whole lot better to piss other people off, then you be pissed off, stand up for yourself, be assertive, don't just lay down and let people walk all over you. Maybe you need to reject how other people are treating you for...

So it looks like you've chosen to define boundaries in your situation, good to see your standing up for yourself and helping other's see things your way.

I'd have to admit that I'm probably guilty of that Ms Spock

Hello IrisL, Reading your post, there's one person you keep treating like shit, and that's the person you see every day in the mirror. It makes sense why you'd feel like shit given the way your treating yourself. You let your co workers treat you like shit, your miserable and unhappy and most of...

Yeah I think we all deal with self loathing, self hatred, fear of the unknown, we get paralyzed in fear one way or the other, our minds clamp shut, and life goes on. I hate change myself, I hate when relationships change, and I want them to be the way they use to be, but the way they use to be...

Maybe he's physically attracted to you, and would enjoy having a secret affair with you, if you were willing? Maybe he's lonely, isolated and desperate for some love and affection but that's to forward so he's masking it with kindness and helpfulness, All viable possibilities, I see your...

I'm definitely not out to hurt you, I'd like to support you and see you happy, joyous and free, sounds like your mind f*cking yourself to keep this situation alive, between you and him, and that your definitely getting the short end of the stick and being used and abused by this guy, it doesn't...

From your post, it sounds like he's trying to rescue you, which could be his issues coming in to play, my x wife use to do me the same way as your treating your man, you might come to realize you are not good for your husband and your husband is not good for you, keep your recovery family close...

So it seems you recognize your reactive behavior or your at least aware of it now, has that changed how your react to situations? Or your still defaulting to old behaviors?

If I can afford it someday, I'd like to start the therapy, old repressed memories are there, but more so the repressed emotions, I certainly became detached from my early childhood emotions of certain traumatic episodes, as a result I don't believe I ever sincerely developed and grow in a...

Thanks guys for the feed back, over the years, reliving childhood traumas has been the only way my mind and body have seemed to be able to resort to, in order to get emotional unloading or relief, but after I relive or have the flashbacks, there's relief, but gradually the fear, and shame start...

I've just heard alot of vets, being freed from alot of old memories and alot of stuff from their past, seems to be their able to find freedom from it, I've had many flash backs and they feel as if I'm going to be die literally, full of terror and a sense of overwhelming, reliving old life...

Ok, so one negative experience, thus far, will see who else has tried it

Has anyone tried this type of therapy? If so have you experienced any relief or improvement? Thanks, David

Thanks SSW Great