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Sorry you're going through this -

@Punky143 I know feeling disconnected is really painful. Even when I don't post anything, reading others' posts, what they're going through and some of the really awesome responses help me feel somewhat connected by identifying with some of the issues being discussed. Feeling lost is hard to...

@Punky143 Like t2mforward said, it's not just you...

@moshpitmunkey I know what you mean... it's part of walking the path.

@.45 Princess Are night terrors a trigger sometimes, if they place us mentally in a trauma event? If so, would this cause the feelings hammering you now?

@Link Removed Awesome response!

Welcome - The forum lists are a good place to find what suits the place you find yourself. There are many good people here, very helpful, insightful, and have a lot of experiences.

There are times to do this... At other times follow your heart's desire. Like acting - Dare to believe in yourself... and try putting the feelings aside for a while, even for a few minutes, and ask yourself... "What if...?" It is much easier said than done, I know... but when I Google...

@Link Removed I use what Blurred suggested - breaking it down into 1-5 minute segments... like 'I can eat a little something' then, 'I can shower, 'Okay, I can do the store for a few groceries.' Sometimes this works for weeks at a time till I can get back to a better place.

@Link Removed Go for it!

@Link Removed Do you have an opportunity, like a studio, or someplace available to study acting and music?

@Miaoqing Do you have anything you like to do that can distract you for the time being, like reading, painting, etc? I'm sorry this sounds so lame...

@Link Removed The short answer: Good things like: I feel this way because of what happened to me; Hardly anyone is all bad, therefore I have some good in me; I am good deep in my soul; I'm not stupid; I care about others; I like doing for others; I am conscientious about my work; I am honest...

@Link Removed I'll have to follow up tomorrow, Sat, in the afternoon.

May I share about my experience with this? Self-hatred drove my suicidal thinking for years. To change this mindset of hate I had to begin to focus on the intellectual truth that I wasn't the bad person I felt I was. In the beginning of thinking differently about myself it felt like hypocrisy...

@Lotis SI has been a part of my life since a teenager. It's a part of the abuse I went through, a coping mechanism to deal with hopelessness, despair, fear and pain. To keep SI from progressing to action I had to change my thoughts from self-hate to understanding violence against me as a child...

Don't listen to those thoughts! I nearly took my life several years ago when I came to focus on the misbelief everyone would be better off without me. I convinced myself that my children deserved better than me. Know what happened? After I found a way out of toxic thinking, I slowly came to...

@Dead Link Removed - I get what you're saying. I think Scout was referring to how each person reacts being different. It took a lot of courage to post this thread in the first place, but I'm glad you did. It clarified for me something that's burdened me for a while, and that is the fact I used...

@JEKBreatheandBelieve That took a lot of courage! Awesome... Can we get a copy of the book?

@Link Removed joey's right - and I'm glad too you're reaching out. I disappeared for a while earlier this year and it's been helpful being back on the forums. I hope you don't quit or give up.

I'm sorry this is happening to you. It's not fair, but it will take effort on your part to find a way to avoid it. You said Can you move to another country? If not, does your country have laws to protect you? Forgive me for going logical (my anger is pretty high right now because of what...

@Bloomy Can you move to another part of the city?

@Jane1234 Reading through the treads on this site will help you understand what you're facing (beyond the obvious). I used to be like what you described your husband doing and his reactions. Having said that, I know from experience he is the only one who can decide whether to change his...

Link Removed I agree with TXbandit. Try not to look down or around at circumstances. Protect your mind from the toxic thoughts. Most of them, as bad as they may feel, are just electrical impulses firing at random. They don't mean anything. Rest is worth the effort (a contradiction in terms)...

I know very well what it's like when despair is draining the life out of you. Do you have anyone who can join you in writing down what you want to change this year and help you do just one thing you most want to do?