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I’m with you. I have this written on every mirror in my house to remind me I’m NOT crazy: What I went through HAPPENED. Who I was EXISTED. Not sure where I read it, but it helps me ~ keep in mind a less than ideal upbringing set the stage for me and my big T wasn’t until I was 28 through 40. I...

I can't remember where I read this (probably here) but I feel this sums it up nicely: I can tell it to you I can't understand it to you I can't live it to it to you I can't experience it to you I can't feel it to you I can't survive it to you ~ Namaste

It’s the difference between life and tv. We don’t experience or sympathize with actors or characters even though we may empathize with them or become involved in the story. “Life” isn’t like the movies.

Ermehgürd...anxiety? I transform from your average mommy of three, already struggling her butt off with cPTSD, into the single most useless and massively suicidal wackjob ever. I already struggle with identity/reality but this goes to an extreme where I do not recognize this creature in my...

I’m very anti pharma too - Are you sure CBDs are illegal there? We live in Colorado where my significant other is a hemp farmer who extracts CBD only (less than 0.3% THC - lab tested for legal reasons) from our harvest and we ship our oils (sublingual) everywhere, including where cannabis is...

I am so sorry you are going through this ordeal while children who desperately need to be removed from homes where they battle real dangers and abuse daily go unnoticed :( I will absolutely pray for you and your family...so many of us ended up here due to gross injustice and ignorance. ~ Namaste

Yes, yes, yes! I wish I had the gift of explaning things as well as you do.

@Freida thank you - I now have 3 young children of my own and if I could send you one of my daughter's pieces of "art", I know exactly which one I'd choose for you!

Gotcha! I felt like a complete EMDR flunky because every wonderful place I'd ever known, felt safe and secure when I'd go to and always sought refuge at - I stupidly took the enemy to my hometown & shared with Satan, sullying them all. I still love and adore "my places" in "my mountains" - but...

Ermehgürd...unbelievable! Like we don't struggle enough already.

Rocks me to my core - I'm still trying to learn to trust in and stop criticizing & rejecting myself. Blargh...

Whoa Please accept my apologies for being a bit off topic, but you just provided me with some insight for further research... I commonly lose my voice and am left speechless or barking in whispers for months - something that never happened prior & has no explanation. It would be a relief to...

I feel you - if it were possible, I'd ask for a paddle to help move this boat we're both in. Hang in there with me & take care. ~ Namaste

I too am glad things went well - as I said, I'm an overprotective mommy along with a high probability of projecting my issues with trust, hyper vigilance, paranoia, etc. upon situations I should not. Please accept my apologies if I overstepped my boundaries - boundaries are a brand new concept...

I hear you, I'm simply a concerned "friend" and a super over protective mommy can't keep her mommy boundaries in check and am driven to ask: Why do your instincts tell you you need to see, hear and know what's actually going on?

I keep reading your words over & over and after this last post, I'm sorry but I have to say: Yikers hun, this now gives me great pause & concern. I ask a favor from you. Remove yourself & trauma (our tendencies to see the past & our patterns repeat). Then please, re-read your own words as if...

Wow! Looks like you've been inundated with info & argument here. I understand the impulse, however I truly hope none of it has caused you further harm or stress due to a driving need for proper "labels" Putting all labels and diagnoses aside, here's my experience: When I take ANY...

Thank you for sharing! ~ Namaste

Hi, I have a 10yr giant gap in my memory. I know that black hole contains very important & many happy memories (the births and early years of my children's lives), yet I struggle with the concept of tampering with a defense mechanism built inside our brains. I can't get beyond the belief that...

MMJ is soooo beneficial when used properly! I've been able to use mmj to replace 16 frickin' liver and mind destroying pharmaceuticals! (Drooling zombie into functional human-lots of benzodiazepines too). Big Pharma is a necessary evil that will always play some part in my life, but mmj has made...

Good for you I telling him to only handle things through the court system! That's a big step! Good luck getting him to do that. Tempting as it is to stand up for yourself and your child, no matter how badly you want to be understood and clear your name...nothing you do or say will make a...

And @desiderata310 - I'm praying I don't get the T-shirt!!

You can get either have your attorney talk to the judge or you can talk to the judge expressing your distress and request that your portion of the proceedings be held behind closed doors without the defendant. There are no guarantees, but it never hurts to try. Also, I'm not sure how this works...

Hi sweetheart - ready to get your summer reading done early? Sorry, but this may be long winded... I hear you and feel your pain. Hand me a paddle and I'll do my best to help you paddle this boat we're in - ugh. My former (& fictional husband - psychopath) would work me into a full on cptsd...

WOW...thank you @ Lopezwhere'sthefire!! I honestly believed I was completely alone & totally insane since while I try to get a handle on this highway of hell. I find myself lost and confused by all of the "labels" and what category I fit in. Turns out it's a bit of everything you mentioned and...