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  1. M

    Problem with therapist misinterpreting me

    My dog just erased my post! Lol. I don't have the energy to retype it.
  2. M

    Problem with therapist misinterpreting me

    I have been in therapy since August. A couple of times he has made an observation/assumption that has not been correct. Last week he made another that really shook me up. I was talking about why the holidays are so hard for me. That Christmas is stressful because my anniversary is the 24th, my...
  3. M

    Fed up with family and angry

    I support my family financially. I have a husband that is too depressed to work, an adult son who is disabled. And a soon to be adult daughter who is supposed to be finishing high school. I make $28K/year. 3/4 of my paycheck goes to housing. The rest keeps the lights and utilities on. The deal...
  4. M

    The spiral and a new relationship

    I have been trying to date again, and I find that I am in competition with the men I have met. I have insulted them, put on airs, and have rejected their advances. This is completely out of character for me. I want connection, but it seems I am too afraid to let someone in. I too feel I don't...
  5. M

    News An empowering article

    https://beatingtrauma.com/2018/10/17/be-an-outcast/
  6. M

    Going camping, feeling nervous

    It has been a trip. That's for sure. My husband's car didn't make it over the mountain. Had to have it towed 20 miles and the mechanic said it's dead, never to drive again. My daughter got sunburned the next day. She cried all night. This morning we drove 40 miles to Walgreens for burn relief...
  7. M

    Going camping, feeling nervous

    My family is driving me nuts. They are so freaking lazy. We are supposed to be on the road in 30 minutes and we are only half loaded. I have been planning this trip for months. I did all the shopping. I loaded my car. I've got like 6 different lists that I'm running through in my brain. There...
  8. M

    Stress responses and weight loss/ lumen

    I've been thinking a lot about my weight and how stress could be preventing me from reaching my goal. Living in a near constant state of anxiety and losing weight are not condusive. I was pre-diabetic 3 years ago. Now i am eating 1800 calories per day, low carb, no dairy; but I have a thyroid...
  9. M

    Childhood Tattoos and PTSD - Good or bad idea?

    I used to go get a tattoo every time I felt like self harming, then as I got older and wiser I got a cover up of a Phoenix for rebirth, starting anew. Recently, I added magnolia branches for strength and courage to continue my journey.
  10. M

    Make A Sentence From 6 Random Letters.

    City idiots take sandwiches at lunch. PWHAAT
  11. M

    I Realize That I

    I have realized that no one will understand me if I don't let them in.
  12. M

    Thoughts of Being “Unclean” or “Impure”

    Affirmations... write them down, stick them to the bathroom mirror, listen to a guided meditation every night before you sleep. Do things that reinforce what an awesome person you are. It's not a quick fix but it sure has helped me over the years.
  13. M

    You Know You Have PTSD When...

    You know you have PTSD when... 1. You are triggered by wild animal documentaries. 2. Grocery shopping feels like an episode of 'Total Wipeout'. 3. Your job feeds into your hypervilligence but its the only place you truly feel in control. 4. Group conversations leave you disoriented. 5. You...
  14. M

    Write a happy story in 3 words

    And she lived.
  15. M

    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    I feel lost and helpless. I have called so many counseling services and cannot find one to meet my needs. I keep hearing, "we don't take your insurance"; "we aren't taking new clients"; "we only offer telehealth appointments." I just want someone to talk to face to face that isn't a three hour...
  16. M

    Irrational Fears

    Mainly, I was wondering if it was common experience among survivors. Can you say more about the Emotional Freedom Technique? What is the word on exposure therapy? I imagine it could be quite traumatic on its own.
  17. M

    Advice for nightmares leading to waking up in survival mode & having flashbacks

    I often journal as soon as I wake up. It sometimes takes an hour or more to process the dream and get myself right enough to face the day. It has become my norm... dream of monsters after me, wake up in a panic, take deep breaths, write in my journal, take a shower, have a cup of coffee in my...
  18. M

    Irrational Fears

    I am terrified of bats. When I was a teenager I thought it was a past-life kind of thing. Recently, I was in a hypnosis session and when the therapist said 'bats' I got the flash of a scrotum. Gross. Still trying to figure it out. I didn't say anything about the picture that flashed in my brain...
  19. M

    How do you deal with someone that really irritates you?

    Good strategy. We use that with kids in elementary school too. Some kid tearing up the classroom, you go in and say, "What's wrong". They tell you about their soggy cereal and their socks keep falling down, and you say, "I see."
  20. M

    Word finding difficulties

    Yup. When I'm stressed or triggered, I fumble all over my words. It's the brains way of conserving energy and thinking power for escaping. If I am caught up in studying my surroundings, I don't say much at all and if I'm forced to speak, it comes out disjointed and rudimentary.
  21. M

    Was that a fawn response?

    Were you trying to gain favor? Or maybe you were just curious about him and didn't understand why such an old, feeble man was so feared. I had a similar experience before I ever experienced any abuse. I didn't see the threat in this particular person, and it confused me that others did. I had...
  22. M

    Confused by my physical response

    It happens to me too. It is a natural physical response that you cannot stop. You can however change your thought patterns surrounding those feelings. Forgive yourself or at least try to. I just realized that I've been acting out my sexual trauma since it happened. How disgusting is that? It is...
  23. M

    Sufferer CPTSD Seeping Through the Bandaids

    Searching for a therapist currently. The waiting lists are long for qualified personnel. Thank you for responding. Yes my bandages are cracking and starting to fall off. Time to get proper treatment. My wounds just won't close on their own, which my loved ones promised if I aired them out. But...
  24. M

    Sufferer CPTSD Seeping Through the Bandaids

    So many traumas, so little time. (Making light of things is one of my coping mechanism) I am having a terrible time finding a trauma counselor. I need to heal. 37 years is long enough to suffer. I had a nightmare this morning. I am still crying about it. I also told my husband of 23 years...
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