Anxiety Over Running Into Therapist

[ellienad]

I've been seeing a new therapist for a few weeks now, and in that time I've disclosed some things that I've never told anyone before. Things having to do with past trauma, etc.

The problem I'm having, is that I'm experiencing a huge amount of anxiety at the thought of running into my therapist outside of the office... I'm thinking it's because I'm sharing such personal stuff in the safe space of her office, the thought of seeing her outside of that safe space is overwhelming? I'm not sure. I would love some opinions on this.

 

[shoes676]

Id say share this concern with your therapist. They may be willing to offer you a list of theyre most frequented places other then work, specificly so you can avoid contact outside of the "safe" space you've established.

 

[catjudo]

Sorry, but I seriously doubt a therapist is going to give a list of the places they most often frequent. However, I would suggest discussing this with your therapist. They should be able to tell you how they handle the situation if they ever run into a client out in public...in my experience, most have a policy to ignore the client and act as if they don't know you unless you approach or acknowledge them first. Discussing this with your therapist will give her an opportunity to help you feel more comfortable with the situation and better know how to help you.

 

[anonymous]

On a personal safety level, a therapist would not give out information about where they are most likely to be found on a regular basis I don't think. I wouldn't if I was a therapist.

The easiest way to deal with this would be to discuss with your therapist what their policy is in such situations. What they would usually do. What you would like to happen if you did run into them outside of their office.

 

[digger]

Sorry didn't mean to post that anonymously! Must have accidentally checked the box when I was trying to post.

 

[shoes676]

I only suggeated it in a half-awake badly worded way to say just try to be personal with them and broach the subject. Thank you for the better suggestions

 

[ellienad]

The thing is, a couple weeks ago, we actually discussed policy for running into one another outside of the office. In the moment I was fine, but later on that day I was anxiety ridden while out doing errands. It seems like the conversation is what triggered even more anxiety than I already had about it. I'm embarrassed to bring it up.

 

[Overcast]

Do not be embarrassed about bringing it up. You should discuss it again because of the anxiety you are feeling. The therapist will understand.

 

[digger]

It's understandable that would bring it to the fore of your mind. Can I ask what the policy was then that you discussed? What would be likely to happen if you did run into him/her?

Are you able to pinpoint exactly what it is you're worried about? Is it that you might run into them when you're with someone else and wouldn't know how to explain it, or is it any chance meeting?

I live in quite a small place, my therapist also lives in the same quite small place - it's not really tiny but small enough that the chances of running into her are more likely than if I lived in a city say. Having said that I've only seen her out and about a couple of times. The first she was far enough away for it not to be an issue. The second time was unavoidable, but I just smiled and she smiled back and that was it.

It does bother me a bit, but I trust her professionalism for it not to be too much of an issue. I think you can trust your therapist to stick to whatever you've agreed with them.

 

[Lucycat]

I frequently see my T outside of therapy as he lives in the same small village and drinks in the local pub. Occasionally I also see him when I am at work, and have bumped into him numerous times at 'functions' - birthday parties and the like.

Right from the beginning he was clear that therapy stays within therapy sessions. We do not ignore each other, but when we meet socially we will talk about other things such as TV programs we have a mutual interest in, or the weather, or any other non-threatening issue. I would never mention anything from a therapy session in a social situation, however bad I might be feeling. I absolutely save it for the next session.

It is really not difficult if you have trust in your T. There have been days when I have been discussing very intimate stuff with him and then bumped into him socially later that same day. Other people present would not have had a clue that we had even seen each other that day.

I really don't think this is something to worry about as long as your T is professional, and you do not cross any boundaries if you do see him.

 

[Hashi]

My first therapist lived and worked in the same small area where I lived and worked. To my surprise I never bumped into her. I think it would have been difficult for me if I had, because thinking about her having any "outside therapy" existence, or her seeing me outside therapy, was a concern for me.

I really, really encourage you to be brave and talk to her about this again. It helped me to do that. The first discussion was along the lines of my therapist saying, "If I see you I won't say anything, but if you say hello I'll say hello back, but that's it". Whereas what I then started worrying about was about 100 other scenarios and a completely different meaning. But talking with her about it more helped me a lot. I hope you can do this, I'm sure your therapist would welcome it.

 

[samson]

My therapist goes to my church. It's a large church, but I still see him every Sunday. I knew his wife long before I knew him. He will completely ignore me if that's what I want. A friend of mine saw him for over a year and one day his wife introduced my friend to his own therapist in the lobby. The wife had no idea and my friend acted like it was the first time he had seen the therapist. That was the moment I knew I could trust him with anything. I don't know how he does it. They are trained for these situations and also bound by law and rules to not recognize you in public. But talk to her. It's totally okay to talk about it as much as you need to to be comfortable.