Any & All Prayers, Well-Wishes or Support, Deeply Appreciated, in This Matter......

[goingonhope]

My eye is improving in appearance as I can open it wide. The white being bloodied, well that's a different story; this will take time to heal. The valium they gave me so that they could perform the procedure has worn off, thank goodness. From this one-time experience that stuff and I don't agree. It mostly worked, but there is nothing like disagreeable, lousy side-effects.

I presume too that I got the eye-medication and not the placebo, due to the condition of my eyeball and a handful of other observations. One being that though my eye was under anestesia and numbed and so forth, I could still feel during the procedure, simultaneous to his drawing back his hand, the needle gently and painlessly sliding and withdrawing back outside of my eyeball.

Also at 11:20 this morning, I stood up and our room was bright. There was some color, clarity and details. In fact the room looked great. I reached up to my eyes certain I'd find my glasses on and they were off. I broke down into tears with surprise and joy. It lasted about 10 min. at which point the detail and clarity decreased slowly at first and then later returning mostly back to blur, lack of most all detail and a feeling of vagueness/nothingness.

I damn' hope I got that medicine, (2 out of 3 chances) bc, why else would my eye-ball be so injured and all red.

 

[Nicolette]

Hang in there Hope. We are thinking of you.

 

[reallydown]

Hi Hope,

Thinking of you. *hugs*

 

[hodge]

Still sending prayers - keep taking good care, Hope!

 

[Grama-Herc]

Welcome back, you were missed!

I continue to keep you in my thoughts and prays. I hope there is a continued improvement, no matter how slow untill this is over for you and your life can again be what you want it to be.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I hope that you are feeling better today. Still saying prayers & thoughts are with you.

 

[Sapper]

Sounds painful.. hope you are feeling better.

 

[Portabella]

Take gentle care of you, my thoughts, hopes and prayers are with you during this time. I hope all is well and the clarity has returned, if so I am so happy for you....T.:kiss:

 

[goingonhope]

:hello: Thanks again, All of You!

My eye has recovered, can open it as if the injection had never occurred, and it feels well. There are no signs of infection, complication and provided I follow directions and introduce 4 antibiotic drops into it daily it would appear as if all has and is going well.

I'm trying to keep my hands away from it too, which is difficult sometimes as I'm finding I need to rub it, itch it, touch it sometimes and know I shouldn't without first stopping everything and/or getting up off my butt and getting some clean kleenex. (lol) Just dawned on me,.....I could carry some with me or locate a box near me.

My head-trip and emot. distress in relationship to previous trauma, has passed I suspect for the most part now; The first couple days were the hardest with that as well, now I'm nearly ok with it. One corner is still all red but it's not nearly as thick and is continually thinning out. And, it's psychol. impact is no longer intense to what it initially was.

On another note, and very simply put minus any bottled up, distressful and frustrated feelings ......Well, we had my mother over for dinner tonight as I didn't want her to feel forgotten/abandoned and I missed her, as well as, had something for her.

......Her lack of interest and any response or words whatsoever regarding my health, condition of my eye or even the procedure, both during last wks. phone convers. and then again tonights visit, quite honestly hurts. This and yrs. of her indiffernce hurts and would make me feel so lonely, rejected and bad, if I didn't now know any better. So as I know her well, I seek to understand and mostly accept this is the way it remains, but it all still hurts.

I was leary of having her over tonight bc it was her words that most impacted me during her participation in a previous DV trauma: (serious facial, eyes and a head injury) that left me with 3 of the 4 corners of my eyes bloodied for two months afterwards.

So I was leary to invite her over here while the wht. of my eye remains yet completely healed as I feared that would once again bring together and simultaneously certain realities, as well as, unmentioned yet understandable fears: 1. Her prescence, 2. her chronic gen. attitude of indifference toward me and a reminder of her previously embedded words to me while I was then being badly beaten- "You f'n deserve it and No, I won't make her stop." Also, 3. the color of my eye, And, 4. my recent observations with how much I've begun to look like my sister who violently assaulted me; 5. my temp. feelings of vulnerability.

......ahhhhh', leary to post this bc, it's my PAST trauma, unrelated to topic and yet very much related in my psyche.

What I have very much felt, resulting from all of your responses, and so especially appreciate, is ......It feels very, very good to be in connection with, and to somewhat know and have gotten to know some of you, and to care about people who also care about me. You've all made me cry some very welcomed tears and much needed release. And, all your well-wishes, prayer and reflection back to me has been such a gift toward healing, deeper pers. insights and nourishment. ,,, and I promise will in return be put to good works in each possible upcoming oppt. that presents itself.

Again, Thank you All so very much! ...:kiss:...

The condition of my eye following the injection is again well! No complications thus far. No reasons to believe there will be any now.

I'll keep you posted on any following significant follow-up and share whether or not there is evidence of decreased inflammation or increased greater vision. From my observ.'s there certainly appears to already have been some improvement in my ability to see with some clarity, brightness and greater detail. "Progress not Perfection"

Hope

 

[tude]

Hope, I am pleased to hear you're recovering well. It's good news.

Take care and keep your fingers out of your eye! :)

tude

 

[batgirl]

Oh wow I just read this... I've been sick myself so I didn't know. Anyways, I wish you all the best Hope, best wishes for full recovery of your eye!

 

[chrissym]

I will be praying for you

I will pray for you and your family, I hope everything turns out well for you.
God bless you,Chrissy