Hi, I have been dealing with PTSD for at least the past year, my home of 20 years burned down and I watched it burn. 3 days after I was sexually assaulted by someone I loved very much. It mirrors events that happened as an adolescent. When I was 15 my father committed suicide at the same time my high school boyfriend was raping and sexually assaulting me weekly. I may have had PTSD all along, but I am not sure. I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 and later in life borderline, but it always felt incorrect. I am just looking for someone or some people who have developed PTSD due to a similar event. The fire was the most horrific thing I ever saw in my life, and did even more emotional damage than my father's suicide or the sexual assault incidents.
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Other Anybody Here Ever Watch His/her Home Burn Down?
- Post starter Greta
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ladee
VIP Member
Welcome @Greta, wish it was under different circumstances but glad you are here.
I didn't watch my house burn down, I was gone, but my helpless neighbors did.
I know what you mean, words just can't seem to describe what it does to you to see almost everything you own be destroyed. And I was also in Hurricane Rita... and lost everything again. And ya, people can say, it's only things, and thank God no one was home.. and all of that is true...But I remember thinking that fire was evil...
Some things only had smoke damage, others I didn't even know what it was...
I was also raped at 14, so there are many things in your post I relate to...
Hope you have a Therapist to help you work thru this trauma and of course we will be supportive how we can. Again, Glad you are here.
I didn't watch my house burn down, I was gone, but my helpless neighbors did.
I know what you mean, words just can't seem to describe what it does to you to see almost everything you own be destroyed. And I was also in Hurricane Rita... and lost everything again. And ya, people can say, it's only things, and thank God no one was home.. and all of that is true...But I remember thinking that fire was evil...
Some things only had smoke damage, others I didn't even know what it was...
I was also raped at 14, so there are many things in your post I relate to...
Hope you have a Therapist to help you work thru this trauma and of course we will be supportive how we can. Again, Glad you are here.
- Post starter
- #3
Yes, thank you. This is my first time on an online forum, too, so I may not be so savvy. The fire happened a year ago, and the sentimental value of the building that burned was kind of unparalleled. It was an old Barn that my father had given me and my sister as a gift, just a few years before he committed suicide. I discovered the fire, called 911, tried to fight it and failed. i was only able to grab three things. The Barn was like my body. It really housed my soul. I lost all my artwork, my musical instruments, 20 years worth of original recordings. I had to scrape my dad's ashes out of a wet, burned carpet.
I have no resentment for fire, I can still be around smaller controlled ones. However, my triggers are crackling noises, police and rescue presence, and any unknown burning smell (it's fine if I know where the smell comes from).
Ladee, I hear you about the damage of the contents. I still play some of my lp records, although almost all of them have a burned edge, but some books made it out fine...fire is a strange thing. I am so sorry that you have been a victim of multiple disasters, and the rape goes without saying.
I do not have a therapist currently, but I am trying to seek help at The Trauma Center. Just in between treatment, figured this would be a constructive outlet in the meantime.
I have no resentment for fire, I can still be around smaller controlled ones. However, my triggers are crackling noises, police and rescue presence, and any unknown burning smell (it's fine if I know where the smell comes from).
Ladee, I hear you about the damage of the contents. I still play some of my lp records, although almost all of them have a burned edge, but some books made it out fine...fire is a strange thing. I am so sorry that you have been a victim of multiple disasters, and the rape goes without saying.
I do not have a therapist currently, but I am trying to seek help at The Trauma Center. Just in between treatment, figured this would be a constructive outlet in the meantime.
ladee
VIP Member
Wonderful people here in this community...glad you are here.
My house didn't burn down but the basement wall collapsed last year leaving it immediately condemned. It's not a covered loss (repair was $20,000 and not affordable for us) so we lost our home. We now live 3 blocks from it and it sits there with all our belongings covered in mold. We foreclosed after the loss so it sold last week at sherrifs auction. I'm actually hoping they will tear it down.
I also used to work in the fire/ water restoration industry and saw too many cases like yours where the homes were total losses, destroyed not only be the fire but also by the water as the fire department tried to save the home. Devastating.
Yes, losing my home so abruptly mirrored part of my childhood trauma (loss) as well. I thought it would be a worse trigger but all things considered, I think I handled it pretty well.
I was mis-dx's with bipolar before my PTSD dx. But that was many years ago, the house didn't trigger it.
Losing a home in such away could in and of itself cause a person PTSD, if you're not already seeing someone I think it would be a good idea. Even if it' not PTSD, talking to a professional will probably be helpful.
I'm sorry for your losses. :(
I also used to work in the fire/ water restoration industry and saw too many cases like yours where the homes were total losses, destroyed not only be the fire but also by the water as the fire department tried to save the home. Devastating.
Yes, losing my home so abruptly mirrored part of my childhood trauma (loss) as well. I thought it would be a worse trigger but all things considered, I think I handled it pretty well.
I was mis-dx's with bipolar before my PTSD dx. But that was many years ago, the house didn't trigger it.
Losing a home in such away could in and of itself cause a person PTSD, if you're not already seeing someone I think it would be a good idea. Even if it' not PTSD, talking to a professional will probably be helpful.
I'm sorry for your losses. :(
Gs172003
Diamond Member
As many times as I've seen people on here saying they were misdiagnosed with bipolar I'm starting to wonder how often that happens.
That said, I'm sorry that all happened to you all
That said, I'm sorry that all happened to you all
I think it's a very common PTSD misdiagnosis, especially if the doctor does not take a thorough history and doesn't ask probing questions. I think delayed PTSD is probably misdiagnosed even more often since the traumatic events happened years previously so the doctors may not even make the connection!
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