Relationship Avoidance

[new02]

Anni,

Thanks for your reply. I am learning thru this forum and at times it is hard to understand. Patience is something I have especially for this person that is the world to me. I have waited 18 years for him and if I have to wait 50 more, I would and he knows.

Everytime he had dissapeared before, when he comes back I have never hold grudges for what he did to me. On the other hand, I tell him that he is the world to me and that life without him has no meaning and that my only intention is to make him happy and that I accept him as he is. I accept him with his imperfections because I am not perfect either. For him, I am willing to leave behind everything I have right now and start with him all over again.

Everytime I can, I tell him that he is everything to me and I never get mad at him for not telling me the same. He is not only the man I love, he is my best friend. He is the person, the only person in the entire world, that knows everything about me. I mean everything.

I have no eyes and heart for any other man. He knows that I would be here for him today, tomorrow and always.

 

[Tinyflame]

Thank you dear anni, you are so sweet, but oh yes- I think we could "share the award co-jointly", lol. :)

-Hugs to you, xox

 

[anni]

Hee Junebug- I'll take it then, if we're standing up there together. I do wish to thank you for making it tons easier to SAY this stuff- it's been awful, just awful walking around all these years with all this crap in my head and life. It's so much easier beginning to think one is not some horrible, waste of a person to know a clearly kind, decent, GOOD person perhaps has some of the same furniture in their head. Deep, deep shame is tough to overcome. I've never, ever spoken of any of this before, or many of the things I have in the forum. Just plain comforting beyond words. XO, tons.

New- so sorry to tangent on your thread. I wouldn't actually if I didn't think there was some really good insight on your guy with all this. I have to say, that you sound like you do have a very good read on your own motivations, feelings and your own life to live apart from your relationship. If you've made the decision this man is the one you wish to wait for and be with, it sounds like a terribly deep commitment on your part, not some needy thing, you know? Rather lovely to think of in that way. I'd have to guess after all these years you must have a very good grasp on his various behaviours and he's able to trust you implicitly. There's no blueprint for what makes a successful relationship- if the balance is what works and fullfills both of you then so be it and more power to you! If being here in the forum can further add to the peace you've obviously come to with this, plus perhaps give you some insight into some further healing for him then I hope you'll visit often.

Peace to both of you,

Anni

 

[Tinyflame]

Dear anni, I feel the same way, my "furniture" looks better in your light, lol.

Love and hugs, and never forget what a sweet and wonderful person you are
A New Chapter of Peace to all of us
xoxoxoxox
:)