Awesome Therapy Session

[Deleted member 5760]

Ohh I just lost my post so I'll start again. I just had an awesome therapy session. I hope this can provide a little inspiration for those who have lost hope when it comes to therapy to keep trying until you find someone you have a genuine rapport with. I got some really positive feedback which was great. Also a lot of the reasoning I'd come up with in my mind was confirmed. We really do have a great working relationship.

Also, I'm not currently on any medication (I have valium for a case of code red distress). Without my having to ask my T suggested we (note the WE folks) NOT put me on any medication. I've spent so many years numb that I didn't want to go back to that. I am now here to process these things and not bury them further (I know the no medication route is not smart for some). I explained how I felt like a tennis ball thrown into a cube, bouncing off every aspect of human emotion. That I'd spent a lot of time crying, but had also conversely rediscovered my sense of humour. The entire spectrum was coming to the surface. She commented that was a great metaphor and it was healthy to be feeling again. That's what I want - that's why I'm there.

I also mentioned that something quite strange has happened in the last month. On several occasions I have been writing and I have looked down only to notice I am writing with my left hand! (I'm right handed). I said 'I look down and I'm writing with my left hand and I'm like 'WHAT?!?''. The T got quite excited and explained that my brain is rewiring. Doing the work I'm asking it to subconsciously. Which is why I can suddenly now write with both hands. (how weird is that hey?).

Anyway, what an encouraging session - just what the doctor ordered :)

 

[cat]

Thats great jen. I'm so pleased for you to have found the right therapist, it makes such a difference.

Good luck on your journey it sounds like you are ready to fight this thing & win!
Take care & stay strong!
Annette x

 

[Deleted member 5760]

Thanks Annette. Your encouragement means a lot. A little saying I noticed on the waiting room wall that I thought I would share :

'When a ship stays in port it avoids any kind of weather. But that's not what ships are for'

-Jen x

 

[Jade-]

That's interesting about writing with your left hand jen. My T. has been having me write with my lfet hand when I'm journaling so that it's more child like.

This week I told him that all of a sudden I can write really well with my left hand. Almost as good as I can with my right one. It's strange.

 

[Cynthiatoo]

Hi Superjen
Have you been doing the patching? Could that be a reason for starting to write with your left hand?

 

[Deleted member 5760]

Actually no.... I haven't 'patched' at all. It just happened. I didn't want to patch without first asking my T of her opinion. She certainly saw the benefits, but recommended to just 'write with my left hand when and if it happens'. That patching was more of a 'scheduled chore' and that it shouldn't be a scheduled event? (ie - I will patch between 8am and 8:20am, etc)

She recommended to keep writing or drawing with my left hand 'freely' when I felt it came. Rather than schedule it in like a 'chore' with an eye patch??? But everybody is different....? ...she felt that doing something like just 'drawing' with my left hand was more beneficial than 'setting an eye patch' on myself.. As I say, that's just my experience.

 

[Cynthiatoo]

I agree that could be very valid. I intend to do the drawing with my left hand also and to study a book called Drawing With The Left Side of The Brain.

 

[cat]

What is patching?

 

[Deleted member 5760]

Cat,

Patching is exactly that. Patching one eye. It is done in an effort to make one side of the brain work harder to balance the overworking side. Best way I can explain with an example - a 'lazy eye'. An eye patch will be applied to the GOOD eye so that the 'lazy eye' learns to work. Does that make sense or is that just a really bad explanation? It's a left/right brain thing..

 

[Cynthiatoo]

There is more explanation in the Thread...PTSD Is Curable,guys.

 

[Deleted member 5760]

cat,

I've tried to think of a better way to answer your question without going all wikipedia on you. This is how I learned and understood right/left brain. It was actually an episode of the Oprah Winfrey show. It was quite some time ago (she's been on the air for a while now). Before I start saying what the show involved I'll just say one thing which is (sorry) 'wikipedic' :

Basically the two sides of the brain serve very different functions
-the left side is logical, it's technical, it's analytical (it reminds me of my high school maths teacher - no offence anyone)
-the right side is more creative.. it is intuitive, random, feeling, wandering (it reminds me of my high school art teacher - no offence anyone)

Anyway, back to the Oprah show. She had this guy on who was an engineer. He worked on aeroplanes. He was basically a 'plane mechanic'. One day he was working on a plane and the propeller (this is all true btw - call oprah to verify) swung down and quite literally sliced off part of his head. A portion of his skull was quite literally sliced off. Two amazing things resulted from this 'incredibly freak accident' :

a) he actually survived. That kind of literal medical trauma to the brain - really, it should have been fatal. But he lived, and :
b) Obviously he had a very traumatic brain injury so simple things like motor skills became a challenge. Part of his brain was missing. It's like someone in a coma who is 'braindead'. Simple functions were extremely difficult - like 'pick up that cup'. Movement, speech, etc etc. All extremely difficult. Almost like someone after a stroke I suppose. But what they did when he was in rehab was had him kneading clay with his hands. To help him redevelop his motor skills (ie - simple things like use your hands to press on the clay, etc). All of a sudden out of 'seemingly' nowhere he began to sculpt. This person had really displayed no evidence of 'artistic abundance' in his life. All of a sudden he's sculpting this clay into ~incredibly intricate and detailed~ works of art. He said he'd dream about them and then just sculpt them the next day.

Now basically, how the neurosurgeons reasoned this was :
-the 'chunk of his brain' that he'd lost was on the 'logical' side. So basically, the right side was just 'dormant'. I wasn't that is wasn't there. It just wasn't needed. He was a naturally left brained person. So in simple terms - his right side (creativity, etc) was just sitting there going 'well, I dont really need to do much cause eh, he's going along just find without me. I'm not really needed. I think I'll take a nap'.

The way it was explained to me when I mentioned writing with my left hand all of a sudden was like this : One side of the brain just kinda takes over and overworks (overTHINKING, etc). The other one just goes 'well I think I'll take a nice long lunch break. Cause this other side's doing alllll the work for me'.

So ---- what is 'patching'?

Patching is giving the overworker a day off and getting the slacker to stand up and start doing some work. So that there is more of a balance between the right/left brain functions. Does that make sense? It's about bringing both 'ways of functioning' into more of a balance. It's about not allowing one to OVERcompensate for the other. To work together. I really hope that made sense and I didn't just do a crap job of explaining a complex subject.

 

[Deleted member 5760]

I AM going to add something and I admit I could be entirely WRONG and if I am humble apologies :

I do not believe PTSD is curable. I believe it becomes manageable. Bit like an amputee with a prosthetic limb. YES, you can walk again - but that doesn't mean your leg is magically back'. Now, when I mentioned patching my T did not say 'oh yes, run off and buy an eye patch'. Why, because it's forcing an unnatural behaviour! She did NOT say 'ok, between the hours of 8am and 8:20am you apply a patch to...' The man in that story I spoke of had suffered an extremely severe and literal brain injury! He'd quite literally lost a section of his brain. This was a severe medical injury.

I do believe that there are benefits in a 'balancing' between reason and creativity. Solid reason and intuition. But to tap into one side should not be a CHORE! Or a set 'task'. Literally from my notes - 'keep it fun. NOT a chore'. To quite literally force yourself to tap into something that is not 'naturally you' is kinda like making yourself do something against your will. I would rather write with my left hand 'just cause it happens' sometimes. And not because I've scheduled it into my roster of daily tasks.

I hope I'm not gonna cop a whalloping for this post. I don't ~know~. We're all different. But her response to 'should I patch?' was not 'yeah, go buy an eyepatch right now and make yourself do it'. It was 'do it if it comes and it feels good. But not with a patch. Maybe just draw with your left hand if it feels good. And when it stops feeling natural and good, stop'. I *think* the reason she thought it was beneficial was because I HADN'T patched. I hadn't forced it.... ???? ...??? ...???