Conservative Christian Parents Think Ptsd Is A Punishment

[lunar]

My highly conservative Christian family insists that I have PTSD because there is some sin in my life that I haven't 'given up to God.' They say that my trauma was in the past, and that I need to just 'put it behind me.' I don't know how to respond to this?

Growing up, mental health was always a taboo subject in our household, and the times it has come up in regards to other people have been in judgement. The mindset was always that if you need therapy for anything, there is something wrong between you and God, or that most mental illnesses are caused by demon possession.

My family has always been abusive, but I still seek a relationship with them. I still have a few siblings that live at home (and are homeschooled), and for their sake, I'm trying to stay put in their lives. I'm hoping that I can open their eyes to have more compassion for people, but I'm starting to lose hope.

Have any of you dealt with something similar? How do you respond to someone who refuses to believe that mental health issues are a medical condition and instead a punishment from God (or the devil attacking you)?

 

[Eagle3]

I grew up being groomed for ministry in just such an atmosphere. I still live with my parents, but its taken YEARS for them to accept that I have a medical issue, not a spiritual one. Basically, I just had to live my life and not allow them to put any spiritual condemnation on me. I come at them with facts, and logic, and science, but continue to stress the fact that I have to handle my own life the best way for me. This includes looking for answers outside of Christianity. Mom's not happy, Dad keeps his mouth shut but sometimes joins Mom in freaking out on me, but they're so screwed up in their own lives I just point it out and it shuts them up. I'm 34 now, so its not like they can really do much to me physically, but I dread the day I get kicked out for being myself.

Good luck, I know exactly what you're dealing with, and it ain't fun.

 

[Ronin]

How do you respond to someone who refuses to believe that mental health issues are a medical condition and instead a punishment from God (or the devil attacking you)?

Consider them batshit insane and move to the saner corner of the world ASAP.

Eventually tell them Devil & I are old pals and they better move or I ask him for favors in dealing with them. :sneaky:

 

[ladee]

You will never convince them. So you seek help and you come here and share.
We understand here and others here have experiances similar treatment and judgement from thier families.
We are here for you. You are not alone.

 

[Friday]

There are enough parables of tragedy, travesty, & suffering as trials god deliberately puts people through that he likes, (Job being the most famous, but many many others) and who have done nothing wrong; not even touching on the trials man puts people through; that choosing to take anything wrong as divine punishment or demons? Means their minds are already completely closed on the subject. When someone decides god is clearly punishing you for mysterious wrongdoing? All that does is show their own judgement of you. Not gods. My exp is that their hearts and heads are so closed, no argument -including angles with flaming swords coming down and arguing in your favor- (demons! Sent to trick us!) will sway them. :rolleyes: I pity them, none so blind as those who will not see, but don't take them to heart.

 

[Tornadic Thoughts]

It's one of the many reasons why I remain so jaded when it comes to organized religions and organizations of any sort. I was taken advantage of, violated, harshly judged, and looked down upon by some of the most highly praised and respected members of various churches (mostly conservative christian) and community organizations and still get queasy when I'm not feeling grounded and am presented with various beliefs and unrequested propaganda. In that same vein, I often wonder what dreadful experiences these individuals have also endured to be able to comfortably exist in that mindset.

Trying to actively replace the word "love" with whatever it is they're trying to convince me of often helps, as I feel that's the desired outcome of much of what I've read through the years, albeit translations of such have gotten incredibly twisted and defiled by many, but it's the actions that I pay more attention to. How do they actively demonstrate their particular flavors of this higher love in their daily actions, other than a whole lot of words and donation requests? Do they enrich my life or lower my vibrations? Avoiding places that choose to see me as demonic, or simply as an issue needing to be fixed, has worked wonders, although it can be quite entertaining to attempt a conversation with them on a good day. I can't imagine having to share living quarters. Best wishes in navigating and deflecting those energies.

 

[Neverthesame]

I'm assuming God himself came down from on high, parked his butt on the sofa and explained to your parents directly, that you need to seek absolution?

Cause they would never consider using the name of God, to add validity to the rubbish they spouted at you, in a vein attempt to come off so pious that you don't question it?
Right?...

mental health was always a taboo subject in our household, and the times it has come up in regards to other people have been in judgement

Didn't they read the part in bible about how we're supposed to leave the judging of other people up to god?
That our role in life is to love and care for each other, especially family?

Your parents need absolution, not you.

 

[watundah]

This reminds me of the "Christians" who believe AIDS is God's way of punishing gays. I'm not sure if I beleive in God, but he/she would be a loving god, not a spiteful one.

Distance is important - physically remove yourself from people who cannot support you. Your younger sibs would benefit from time with you but there is no reason to share your healing or remaining pain with those who judge you. I would try to get to a pick up and drop off scenario but Im guessing that will bunch the parents' panties, too. Best to you. I am sure this is hurtful to endure.

 

[Ronin]

This reminds me of the "Christians" who believe AIDS is God's way of punishing gays.

I always wondered why straight people got AIDS /too/, then, tho. :rolleyes:

Brings me to: Also, one can play Bad Logic Bingo on quotes of people like that. It's a score every time.

 

[Freedomfighter]

My highly conservative Christian family insists that I have PTSD because there is some sin in my life tha...

Oho, that is a good one. My dad abused my mom her whole life, he is such a good Christian, goes to church every week, sings those songs that do not mean anything to him, the great pretender. There are other good Christians in my family who know what he did to me, who know about the abuse and who attempt to scold me when I try to bring it up.

Oh yeah, a whole beautiful family of dysfunctional Christians there, seems your family is similar. When you get PTSD there is one reason for it: you were violated so intensively that you ceased to function correctly, to the point that your brain was damaged irreversibly.

Seriously, it is a good thing I don't know your family, because their sin is to abuse an innocent victim. But then I know a whole lot of Christians who, after I was stalked by several vicious males, will to this day harass me to the highest degree about it.

Their minds are filthy too, wives that cheat, wives that abuse their own kids and husbands at home, but will not under any circumstances give up totally destructive lives and behaviors because then they have to jump off the money train.

 

[Fadeaway]

I can completely relate to this @lunar. In fact I had an exorcism performed on me during my preteen years due to my struggles from THEIR abuse! People like this fear that by listening to any opposing views they are putting their own relationship with god at risk, so they won't even allow themselves to consider another point of view out of fear.

@Freedomfighter There is a line from a song that sums it up better than I ever could.
"Indoctrinated minds often contain sick thoughts and commit most of the evil they preach against" ~Epica

 

[Justmehere]

You won't be able to convince them to change their beliefs.

First of all, it sounds like they are your abusers. Abusers by the nature of being abusers use whatever they can to blame the victim for the abuse. If it wasn't twisting religion, it would be something else they do to try to convince you it was their fault.

If they were to change their beliefs about mental health and therapy, and even more so, admit that the past did have a legmitate traumatizing affect on you, they would have to take full responsibility of what they did and feel tremendous guilt for their actions.

If they had the caoacity to handle their own stuff, and do that, well then they wouldn't have likely become abusive jerks and drank the kooky-kool-aid in the first place. They would have gotten help and therapy for themselves and not fallen deeply into a terrible form of religion. But they didn't. They chose child abuse over getting help.

This isn't the fault of mainstream conservative Christianity. This is f*cked abusers using religion as an excuse to abuse a child and then try to manipulate them into believing child abuse can be simply put in the past and no one has to face their guilt.

Let go of trying to talk to them about this and talk them out of what they believe. I used to do that with abusers. It never worked.

Find the people who are safe and who will support your recovery. Focus on them.

:hug: