So important!!!
Brian,
Some important things to remember when dealing with a person who has been triggered and is suffering from the effects of a PTSD event.
Listen!! You can't fix it!! Just listen!! It dosen't matter if she has to tell you ten thousand times what has happened to her, or what she is seeing don't tell her to get over it, or try in any way to invalidate her feelings. Let her vent!! This is the way to heal. It must be allowed to come out. The reason it is so painful is because it has been locked away. Those who suffer and have suffered on this board know that if these locked away emotions are not allowed to come out they will anyway. In a self distructive manner that hurts the sufferer and all involved. Many times when these events occure the person suffering will not even remember what abuse the event was caused by. Only the emotion. Flash backs are a very powerful emotional trauma that can scare the living crap out of the sufferer, and cause them to doubt their sanity. It seems that they can serve a perpose. They can help the suferer to identify the abuse that caused their PTSD! This is a very painful process, but one that leads to healing.
My best freind and wife has been fighting this war for about 3 1/2 years. We have come along way. The first time she was triggered I had to take her to the hospital. Now, when she is triggered, (always a night) we get up and have a snack and talk about it. Then we go back to bed. (usually) Some times it's a couple of days before she is back to normal. She is in the care of a Pysc. and gets some therapy. She gets stronger every day. This woman put herself through undergrad school, raised two kids and put up with an abusive spouse with all of this volcanic emotion, before I knew her. Then when we married, and her spirit knew it was safe all of this came out to deal with. When we get on the other side of this time, both of us will be different, stronger and closer.
Sorry to rattle on so...Just wanted to show the light at the end of the tunnel...
Wayne
Brian,
Some important things to remember when dealing with a person who has been triggered and is suffering from the effects of a PTSD event.
Listen!! You can't fix it!! Just listen!! It dosen't matter if she has to tell you ten thousand times what has happened to her, or what she is seeing don't tell her to get over it, or try in any way to invalidate her feelings. Let her vent!! This is the way to heal. It must be allowed to come out. The reason it is so painful is because it has been locked away. Those who suffer and have suffered on this board know that if these locked away emotions are not allowed to come out they will anyway. In a self distructive manner that hurts the sufferer and all involved. Many times when these events occure the person suffering will not even remember what abuse the event was caused by. Only the emotion. Flash backs are a very powerful emotional trauma that can scare the living crap out of the sufferer, and cause them to doubt their sanity. It seems that they can serve a perpose. They can help the suferer to identify the abuse that caused their PTSD! This is a very painful process, but one that leads to healing.
My best freind and wife has been fighting this war for about 3 1/2 years. We have come along way. The first time she was triggered I had to take her to the hospital. Now, when she is triggered, (always a night) we get up and have a snack and talk about it. Then we go back to bed. (usually) Some times it's a couple of days before she is back to normal. She is in the care of a Pysc. and gets some therapy. She gets stronger every day. This woman put herself through undergrad school, raised two kids and put up with an abusive spouse with all of this volcanic emotion, before I knew her. Then when we married, and her spirit knew it was safe all of this came out to deal with. When we get on the other side of this time, both of us will be different, stronger and closer.
Sorry to rattle on so...Just wanted to show the light at the end of the tunnel...
Wayne
