Dealing With Ptsd In A Relationship

[random_lover79]

Hey guys. Just a fore-mention, I personally do not have PTSD. However, my boyfriend does. I need some help understanding what I need to do. I currently attend a university, so that should help you determine my age. My boyfriend is quite a bit older than me, 35ish. We have been dating for almost a year now. In the last few months, he lost his job due to some odd circumstances. He is generally a good guy, one who is generally very sweet and caring. However, since he has lost his job, he seems to have lost everything. He has been looking for a job now off and on and seems to have no luck. He sees a therapist once a week to help him with his PTSD. However, I have noticed that while it may be helping his PTSD, it makes him extremely difficult to deal with at home. He has been picking arguments left and right over stupid nonsense that normally is not an issue. I love this man with my whole heart, but I am having trouble dealing with the arguments and bullshit that he brings up. I am currently the sole provider for our household. It is very difficult for me, as a college student, to work 2 jobs and provide everything for our household. I am at my limit & I need a little help understanding. It is as if nothing I do is good enough, even though I work very hard to provide. I don't mean to sound whiny or crazy, I just need a little help with determining what I need to do. It has gotten to the point where he never comes to bed anymore, nor has he for the last month and a half. I am feeling deprived and alone. I don't know what to do anymore, so any help is appreciated!!

 

[Sammyiam]

Hi Random lover 79,

Welcome to the PTSD site, you will find lots of information on this site and people that you can talk to. I have found so many helpful people on here, they are amazing and the many different countries which we all come from unit together to help one another out. I hope you find the support on here that I have

Take care

Sammy

 

[Kintsugi]

How long has he been seeing a T? I would say that a rise in symptoms due to engaging in some kind of active healing is pretty typical. I would also say that this situation sounds unacceptable, or it would be for me. How have you tried approaching the struggles and challenges you are facing, or his attitude? I would not be happy myself if I was busting my butt to provide for myself and another while going to school and the person I supported was always snapping at me.

I don't think it sounds healthy for either of you to continue living in this manner. Having PTSD and being symptomatic does not necessarily mean you are not capable of problem solving at all, and it certainly doesn't give you license to treat others badly (even if that is a common result).

I encourage you to assert your needs in your relationship. You deserve care too.

Welcome to the forum.