EMDR Concerns - Am I fooling myself into thinking I'm ready for this leap?

[PamelaS]

For me EMDR was and is the best thing I have done to try and get a hold on my life.

I was actually talking to a friend about it last night for the first time, which is an achievement in itself as I was so paranoid about anyone knowing I was even in therapy when I started.

It was hardcore work and very painful at times - after a session I would sometimes need to put on compression clothing (I don’t own a weighted blanket!) to try and feel right in my skin, and there were times in the beginning when I absolutely couldn’t tell T what moments were coming up - but that was totally ok.

Once I got honest about what I could handle, and we talked about my window of tolerance, they were great at slowing things down if needs be. Sometimes we would stop and I would cry and have time before moving on, sometimes I could push myself further. My nightmares and memories became much more vivid for a period of time and I questioned the process when I felt it was taking so long, but the changes have been huge.

There’s whole chapters of my life I can talk about without wanting to be sick and the emotional devastation is gone.

Trusting T came with time.

I hope it helps you find some freedom.

Thanks for the encouragement. Maybe someday I’ll do it too. Not yet.

 

[Lost in the Woods]

I haven’t been doing EMDR that long and it seems to work very well for me. Memories are coming back. So far, nothing that upset me. I remembered some details of one of my mother’s suicide attempts, I also have begun to understand how traumatic being dumped in a sadistic boarding school. At age 9 was for me. I still carry that wound and when I feel abandoned I feel the feelings I felt then.