Finally Went To The Va For A Ptsd Eval

[Ocero]

Went to the area VA Wednesday after avoiding going for over 15 years. I know my triggers, I'm on my meds and I felt like I was doing just fine dealing with my "issues". I was self medicating with marijuana for over 10 years and had to stop due to a random drug test at work, being suspended with pay, being sent for an alcoholism assessment{?}, and been dealing with my employers B.S.. They actually "tried" to terminate me due to my prescription to Ativan. That was the recommendation of MFT that I honest wanted to kill that woman because of how she treated me in our session. But she has been report to the license board twice, Once after the session and again because of her recommendation. But EEOC must have called my employer because they changed their tune, and were all but kissing my ass.
Anyway I'm rambling, My experience at the VA was better than I could have every expected. The lady I spoke to was wonderful. Only thing is it brought back all the things I have been avoiding. Feel like I opened Pandora's box, and my demon is back as if "IT" ever left to begin with. Sitting here now and vivid memories from 90-91 are flashing back. So here I go again, working through my issues and attempting to control some facet of my life.
I have to have a job description signed by my doc so I can take a return to work drug test. Been trying to go back since Mar. 7th, took a test on my own and was clean then. I'm going back to work, I have to, it was my solace although I might not like some of the employees or the environment. I worked basically by myself and electrical panels and machinery don't ask questions, make stupid statements or just piss me off in general. Concerned that working alone might not be an option anymore. Really at a loss of what to do, but I know I have to do something. Because sitting around with my thoughts certainly isn't an option.
Sorry for the long post, 1st time post and Thank you all.

 

[Esu]

The idea of therapy is too stay the course to work through your problems. It's easier to do it in a concentrated way over the short term and then get some counseling now and again. After a while your problems will get better. PTSD never goes away but you can learn to live with it. Which is better than feeling OK for a bit and then like shit for a long time. Therapy helps the wild swings. Try to find something at the VA that will help. They do have many programs now. Be proactive, you have to if you want to get better. You can get better.

I worked in construction for a long, long time. One of the things that I liked was that I was able to work alone most of the time. So, I can understand where you're coming from. There's nothing wrong with that.

Glad to hear you went to the VA and are getting on track. Best of luck and Stay The Course. Life can get better.

 

[Bico]

Once you start therapy, don't be surprised if your conditions get worse for a while. It's par for the course for most people. It will get better. The upside is, once you are working on your issues, some of their energy is dissipated and the recovery starts.

 

[Ocero]

Oh, believe me I've dealt with it long enough to know. Typically takes me 3 days to get back to feeling somewhat normal after an episode. That is "IF" I can keep the episodes apart that long. No fear, I'm not giving up. I love to see the sun rise in the morning and tomorrow will always be a brighter day. Took a long time to learn hat though.

 

[Molid]

why hide in here and talk things out? 99% of us in here will support you and want to... but posting under a cloak of secrecy sucks. Don't expect anything like a hug or kiss from the likes of me. you cant be honest with the forum in here about yourself you don't belong. Go hid somewhere else. or POST like the rest of us do in the intro area and make some friends. Otherwise don't bother to post here.

 

[Icuso]

Oh Baby.......Secret postings.......

 

[Bacuzu]

I agree this should be done in the intro section this bloke is being an arse.

 

[Ovano]

Is that you Jar-Bacuzu. You are dead right. The anonymous section is used for things you don't want associated with your user account. For example, that reddevil1111 is a huge twat for replying the way he does, Or wagon needs to get some new meds, etc, etc. Or it could be used for 'How do I talk to my wife'. This would be used when the wife has access to internet accounts, etc.

If you wish to hide from everybody you might as well not come on the forum.

From now on we won't respond to shit that should be on the open forum.

 

[Ocek]

You got that right...bunch of bullies posing as arseholes blaming their PTSD to pick on fresh meat.

 

[Ulifuh]

There is medication for this shit? Wonders never cease.

 

[Ohod]

You got that right...bunch of bullies posing as arseholes blaming their PTSD to pick on fresh meat.

Really. Please direct me to the person who is getting "picked on", singled out or hazed. I missed that.

 

[Mucu]

Flaming, flaming, flaming. Oh! someone said something I didn't like, poor me. f*ck OFF!!!!!!!!!