Flashback At School In Front Of My Entire Class

[Ice_Fire]

I feel so embarrassed now. A friend was talking about dolls and someone who's put a load of disturbing looking ones around an island Mexico way. Anyway, he Googled pictures and I just fell apart.

I was back with mum, with her 'hurting' my toy dolls and then threatening/actually hurting me wherever she hurt the doll. :-( I was shaking and crying and I wasn't really aware of anything going on around me. I've made such a fool of myself!

Anyone else been in a similar situation? How did you deal with it and how did your friends/coleagues react? Any information or advice on how to deal with this would be very welcome.

 

[maelstrom]

I'm so sorry that this happened to you! You know what, if your classmates laugh at you then it is their problem. You were dealing a very difficult situation and it was not your fault that you broke down. You did not make a fool of yourself! That said, I understand that it must be an embarrassing or uncomfortable experience for you. If people ask could you just say that it brought back some memories? They would probably just think that somebody in your life passed away and that person was somehow associated with dolls. You don't have to explain more. It is fine and it's going to be fine. I'm lucky that I haven't had an experience like yours. The closest I came to was one time at a train station, when I broke down and sat on the floor and cried. But it was in a corner and nobody but the janitor really noticed me, and he didn't say anything. Maybe he just thought I was sad because I was leaving somebody (it was a train station after all). So I bet your friend wouldn't have "seen through you"--so try not to worry about what they might think. Hope you feel better soon!

 

[Ice_Fire]

Thank you! I must admit, nobody has said anything since, apart from "Are you feeling better today?" So, I guess it's been okay. Thanks again:)

 

[Jen93]

This happens to me ALL the time- the flashbacks in school. It was a school trauma- so I really couldn't avoid having my friends know about my trauma. My friends and such know now just from my actions if I'm flashing back or dissociating: (head bowed, whimpering, shaking, or staring straight ahead with no apparent touch to reality.) They ground me. I've told them my story... Well, parts of it, so they know some of my triggers and they usually ask me quietly, "Are you okay?" if they think something's going to set me off.

I suggest leaning on your friends- not too much, but enough to feel that you do have support. Don't be embarrassed. PTSD is a sign that you are strong and a survivor. You have beaten trauma- this is merely just a reminder of how strong you are. Don't be ashamed of it. You also don't need to feel obligated to talk about your trauma or anything with everybody that watches a flashback happen, but if it happens again, I suggest making sure that you have a supportive friend or teacher that can get you out of the fog or the scene or something.

Best of luck!

Jen

 

[Ice_Fire]

My tutor knows quite a bit of what's going on with me at the moment, so I can lean on her. I'm feeling okay about school again now. I feel more comfortable now I've decided to stay on and join the year below me. Nobody really has any history with me so it's easier. I guess that considering I was bullied at school as well as abused at home, I've always been scared of breaking down at school. I'm sorry your trauma is school related, it must be so difficult to study...you're very brave to still be in school! :tup:

 

[Redd1]

I am a high school teacher and I have had flashbacks in school. I have found in my learning community there are people that are supportive and others that are complete jerks. But, I think this is true in any community. I have C-PTSD I did not initiate anything that happened to me. I understand the shame and embarrassment of having a flashback in school but.. I am a survivor and so are you

Usually after a flashback I am so hyper vigilant and my anxiety level is so high my perceptions are off. So some of the people may not be as negative as I first thought. Usually in a day or so I hear who's making comment and who's not. This is one of those things about a professional workplace that is not very good for US.

But...WE HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG. I agree with Jen93. You don't owe anyone a life story. If you are comfortable to talk to some of people that's great. If not that's great too. You have to take care of you the best way you know how. Please always remember that you...are...incredible; you have survived things that many of those who reacted negatively to you could not. You are in a learning environment so you have chosen to move on with your life in one of the most positive ways (hey, I'm a teacher so a little bias here).

Just keep loving yourself.

 

[Ice_Fire]

Aww thank you! That's so lovely. I'm sorry you also struggle with flashbacks at school. You're right with the whole 'some people are great, others are...not.'

 

[Malia]

I do this as well! The worst was when I went to a movie with my husband and there was a rape scene. I definitely wouldn't have gone if I had known that was in it, but alas, I did not. I starting strembling, crying, and ran out of the theater in a panic. It was pretty embarrassing! People were worried, but I think it was obvious to understand what was going on so people were actually pretty nice. A manager also tried to help but it made me feel pretty dumb. I'm very lucky to have the most supportive husband in the world! He understood completely and just held me after!

Don't worry about what people think. Of course it's okay to be embarrassed but try not to let it make you feel bad about yourself! You can't help it and you know that! Also, if anyone makes fun of you just look at it as a great way to see who your true friends are. I'm so sorry you have to deal with that! I really hope people will be kind and understanding to you.