Getting really nervous for first pdoc apt.

[Lee2001]

I am seeing pdoc for the first time on Thur. I knew I would be nervous but this is very, very hard for some reason. It took me a year of therapy to discus self harm and now I am suppose to tell a stranger upon first meeting them? It’s so shameful for me and the thought of that and him asking about the past abuse, ptsd, depression, anxiety and so on is is over the top. I know being totally honest is the only way for help but I am scared to have any of it on medical record. Not sure if I can be totally honest?? How Do you all do it? Please share!

 

[Deleted member 37474]

I had my first p doc appointment today. It went really well. All of that stuff you are worried about were little checkmarks on the form I filled out. My heart raced and considered lying when I saw the check for self harm. I went ahead and checked it. Included my use of pot, knowing it is illegal here. I figured if I really want to fix me, I should be really honest.

The doc was so kind and calm. He asked why I have ptsd and I said "rape." 24 years ago in college. He looked me in the eyes and calmly said, "these things, they stay with you." I felt so incredibly validated and so much empathy by his voice and body language. That was all the trauma talk we did other than me talking about the panic attacks from triggers... more validation.

He explained panic attacks and treatment and side affects. I felt so at ease with this man. The wooden door was closed and I did focus on it for a little while, but moved my eyes to the big glass window, and that helped.

I hope that my experience can give you some comfort towards your upcoming appointment.

 

[Lee2001]

Thank you @TexCat . This truly helps so much. Your experience seems very doable, and I like that you spoke of the paper work and check marks. I have been debating how honest I was going to be with it. I really like that you didn’t have to explain too much and how the doc seemed to be caring. I can’t say the words to the trauma but I guess I can work around it and still get point across. Thank you! Very glad your apt went so well.

 

[Lee2001]

Had apt today and talk about being truly nervous all day! Super hard! My Therapist did go ahead and talk to pdoc for me which helped immensely... I did not have to explain traumas or any abuse as he was told. He did say I had been through a lot and experienced some of the worst stuff while being a kid. I did explain on the self harm and he said it’s so common and truly a symptom manifestation of PTSD for me anyway. He started me on cymbalta and klonopin for now. We will see how it goes. Thanks everyone for sharing.