Healing inner child

[419can.dance]

my homework this week was simple. Write a letter to your inner child.
Little did I know my inner child was still broken, bruised, and alone.
I would like to share just a piece of my letter to my inner child. Because just seeking my inner child was an accomplishment I hold dear I want to share with others.
Something that may ring true to many others. I want to say it gets easier.


“So today I appeal to you, my child. And I know you aren’t sure what to think because honestly, nobody has ever appealed to you before. You have always been told what to do. You have always been forced to be someone different. And I know you don’t trust me. But I appeal to you anyway. And I will wait until you can understand that I am not here to manipulate or take advantage of you. But I would like you to let me take care of that adult stuff that is just too much for a child to take on. I would like you to let go, just a little, so I can do for you what nobody ever did, let you be a child, let you grow and develop in the way you were never allowed. And as you do, all that you are will become who I am. And we will be together, living life in a unified inner world.

And you will finally be able to rest.

You will finally be able to close your eyes without fear.

You will finally find peace under my wing.

You will be home.

Love,

Me … And You”

 

[Anana]

Gorgeous! You ve done a great thing! Hope you have already felt the positive results of your "private talk"). And i still cant say it to my little... I remember the first time when my therapist told me to look at my photo when i was 5 and to say that i love her. and i literally couldnt do it i because all of a sudden I realised i never loved her actually. I did evertying to others to make them happy and always said "shh" to myself not to bother others, not to nag, not to dream, not to be week, etc. so i couldnt just lie to that nice girl at the photo, and even now there are times when im just silent to her though there appeared one thing that i can promise to her . I will never let others to hurt her

 

[Tinyflame]

I wish I could say that to my adult self, never mind. And that it was true and I could believe it. :( But good for you @419can.dance . :hug:

 

[419can.dance]

I wish I could say that to my adult self, never mind. And that it was true and I could believe it. :( Bu...

I struggle daily. This letter was hard to write because now I expect myself to make the changes.

 

[Tinyflame]

@419can.dance I probably shouldn't write here because I don't relate or find solace in an inner child concept, though ironically I feel half-child/ half-woman, but I agree. (I hope this makes sense! .:oops::rolleyes: JMHE. )

I think there is a side of me that is quite innocent, (which sounds funny to say, but really is quite true), wherein perhaps I 'hope' for the best in all things/ people. I can feel quick to laugh or be amazed. See the 'screwball' side of things. Just be happy to feel happy/ safe/ at peace. And maybe it's (well undoubtedly, for everyone) influenced also by my fears a a child- my childhood in general (both good and bad). Yet I am just as seamlessly a woman (albeit very rarely feel like a safe or overly-confident one, if that's even the word. :( ) I've heard it said 'we are beautiful people with much love to give, and (however) the relationships take a lot of work, and are not conventional, but worth it' (their words).

But also, simply (regardless of age because I just accidentally heard we're supposed to 'let ourselves off the hook' for much of our self-expected onus when we were children- because we were children (or teens) ) it is up to each person to choose or not what we will define ourselves with. So we have to own our stuff, but we decide what we will believe. Much as you said above, the changes perhaps that are the biggest are our self-perception and other-perception. And forgiveness- i.e. it was wrong I let it go, so I can live unburdened. And maybe the hardest is self-forgiveness? Then I can see the changes evolving sometimes without much conscious awareness; that is our hearts are different, our thoughts are different, our actions are different if attune to the thoughts and our hearts. Sort of the difference between 'faking-it' or white-knuckling vs believing in a new way.

I find it very difficult to believe I am different than how I think I am. So I probably have never really viewed myself as a childlike-child. I think of what I should have done or didn't do, not what should have been done for me. Which I suppose is part 'too-adult' thinking. But nonetheless, I can also decide/ choose to accept many things about my childhood were unconventional. Some contributed positively greatly, some wounds resulted. Even if I can't quite figure it out. It's ok for great gratitude to exist parallel to realizing there was great uncertainty, some terrible things happened. But I want it not to inordinately determine my World view of life, what (harm/ lies/ fearing) to expect from others, where and how I will end up.

Best wishes to you. Hope that makes sense.