How Do I Beat Alcohol?

[Loloma]

I used to drink like a fish in my first marriage and so did my partner. It is amazing that I managed to get up and go to work every day. Occasionally I was so smashed I couldn't make to work, or couldn't get through the whole day.

Shocking when I think about it now. It slowed down a bit when the Doctor told me I had liver disease and that if I kept going I would kill myself. Suppose it was a crutch to kill the emotional pain. It kept going until after I left him and went to live with second hubby. I was drinking two to three bottles of wine a day and sometimes spirits.

All went fine until I was painting one day and fell down the stairs with a can of paint and nearly broke my back. The walls were covered in bright splashes of paint, but it wasn't as colourful as the bruises over my body. Ended up in the emergency room in so much pain, both from the bruises and then the awful headache from the hangover.

It wasn't easy and it took a while, finally I managed to taper off and not drink every day. Stopped smoking round the same time. That was sixteen years ago. I still drink but maybe only a glass or two a week. If I had of kept going I would have died, as I have insulin dependant diabetes for fourteen years. It takes a lot of self control and depriving yourself sometimes isn't an option. I am happy with the way it is and I know I can have that one drink and stop!

 

[mamachick]

I have used alcohol to cope in the past, particularly after an accident I had. As we know -it isnt unusual with ptsd as others have stated. We can also switch addictions-I learned I prefer slot machines. Its just damaging in a different way. We have to decide for ourself what amt is harmful. Addiction is tough to face.

I have no good answers but also wish you the best

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Hi-

I abused alcohol. I drank to numb myself and not feel the pain. I became an alcoholic. I have been sober 3 years. I miss it sometimes. But it was causing problems for me. It was turning me into someone I did not recognize. I was in denial about my drinking. I did not think I was doing anything wrong. But I was messing up and it was causing problems for me and my family. After the last episode which resulted in alot of shame for me, I actually quit cold turkey. I did not go to AA although I have gone to some AA meetings in the past.

I hope this helps and does not hurt. I like being in control now. Even though control is an illusion. I am not messing up. I have peace of mind and I do not get sick from drinking anymore. My hat is off to the people who can limit their drinking. Once I start I keep on going. So this is how I handled it for me.

 

[mamachick]

I read something about a program called SMART Recovery. Evidently they use it more in prisons (not many local meetings) and some other places. It seems t be more about have self control, compared to 12 steps that basically says turn it over to God.

12 steps programs work for a lot of people. I dont think it would for me because of the basic principals. Just an alternative

 

[Lucycat]

Last night I was in a great mood last night, and went out in the evening and had probably too much wine. But it didn't matter!

What it reminded me was what my T advised long ago. Do not drink when stressed. That is the bit I keep forgetting. If I am feeling bad the alcohol makes it worse. If I am feeling good alcohol- in moderation- is OK.

So, despite me saying I wasn't planning to drink - I did. But I am not feeling bad about it. I enjoyed my evening!!

 

[Anna]

I also used to binge drink. I have it under control now.

As long as you enjoy yourself and drink it in moderation then you have the situation under control.

I cannot sleep unless I have something to drink. What is important is to learn and know your limits. Don't let it spiral out of control.

 

[Sunny:)]

I can relate to what everyone is saying, but my problem isn't alcohol, it's food/bingeing. I'm okay until around 5 p.m. when I start fixing supper, then I binge while I'm cooking and by the time supper is ready to eat, I'm sick to my stomach. Then I hate myself. This is a self-destructive pattern that's gone on for as long as I can remember and I'm sick of it. I wonder sometimes if there's something about 5 o'clock that's triggering me, or just being in the kitchen is stressing me so I binge to cope. It's driving me crazy. If I binge for days on sweets I get crazy (dissociate) and nearly lost a friendship recently because I acted out under the influence.

I've been in 12 step programs for eating disorders for 25 years. I've had periods of "clean" eating, but can not sustain it. This is driving me nuts that I have no control over my addiction to sugar. The self-hate is killing me.