LilacWine1113
New Here
Hi All,
Like many others with PTSD, I can play the part of the avoider or the person on the other side.
One thing that I have felt proud about for the most part, is owning when I know that’s what’s happening.
A recent before the recent… a friend of mine caught me saying we can’t be friends anymore because I no longer felt safe being vulnerable with her. She didn’t do anything “wrong” necessarily and her actions were a consistent trigger that I couldn’t handle. I admitted this to her, before my not so ideal action of blocking her.
This is also newer for me, to feel my feelings and admit when I know I’m not yet ready to face certain things.
A couple weeks ago, a good friend who is also an ex tried to reach out to me while under the influence. I’ve been there so I texted the next day saying “hey, sounds like you needed to talk and didn’t seem ideal…what’s going on?”
He graciously let me know I was right to assume the circumstances and shared big changes were happening that he wanted to talk to me about but we can essentially pin it.
It’s been two weeks, I texted “does it involve a move?” and he emailed me a boundaried “I can’t talk about this now. I’ll email you when I can.”
I know I can’t control the situation and I also have a really hard time deciphering how to stick up for myself while honoring the other person’s path. If someone who has been in the grey can help, I’d appreciate it. Also seeking guidance on how to handle the conversation when it comes.
Like many others with PTSD, I can play the part of the avoider or the person on the other side.
One thing that I have felt proud about for the most part, is owning when I know that’s what’s happening.
A recent before the recent… a friend of mine caught me saying we can’t be friends anymore because I no longer felt safe being vulnerable with her. She didn’t do anything “wrong” necessarily and her actions were a consistent trigger that I couldn’t handle. I admitted this to her, before my not so ideal action of blocking her.
This is also newer for me, to feel my feelings and admit when I know I’m not yet ready to face certain things.
A couple weeks ago, a good friend who is also an ex tried to reach out to me while under the influence. I’ve been there so I texted the next day saying “hey, sounds like you needed to talk and didn’t seem ideal…what’s going on?”
He graciously let me know I was right to assume the circumstances and shared big changes were happening that he wanted to talk to me about but we can essentially pin it.
It’s been two weeks, I texted “does it involve a move?” and he emailed me a boundaried “I can’t talk about this now. I’ll email you when I can.”
I know I can’t control the situation and I also have a really hard time deciphering how to stick up for myself while honoring the other person’s path. If someone who has been in the grey can help, I’d appreciate it. Also seeking guidance on how to handle the conversation when it comes.