Labels and struggling with people knowing

[DharmaGirl]

If they’re not okay with those behaviors to begin with? They’re not going to magically become okay with them, now that they know their source.

This is a great piece of info. I used to think that being open with my diagnosis would help detract from the stigma surrounding it, but now I don't. You're right, if people don't like who I am, sharing a diagnosis won't make them like me any more. I've found that a few "friends" have suddenly noticed that they have PTSD when I disclose. Not that they have trauma or symptoms, but they just want to join in the "fun".

I was of the understanding that people who have criteria A trauma don't want to disclose. I can't remember where I read that, I'll have to do a search. I seem to remember that it was a symptom of PTSD. I'll look it up and get back.

 

[osiris]

Lots of replies with great points that I want to work my way through.

To be clear, I don’t actually want to disclose, and I think disclosing the original mess and how that was dealt with is a big part of having PTSD anyway, but I am hung up on how can I have a support system and how is that possible with who I am and the things that define me.

There’s also that problem of all or nothing. I’m caught in that trap of thinking you either don’t know me at all or you deserve to know everything, which is obviously not true, and I need to work on that!

Dealing with the family and how they see me is such a source of stress. The labels are just a scratch on the surface of what is really going on.

 

[Freddyt]

I'm with everyone here. One of the issues is oversharing. Somehow that filter isn't working right - especially when stressed.

Family knows. It was in a way unavoidable since I sort of came to a breakdown point after my second trauma and that couldn't just be hidden. There was just one person in our families that never knew - dad. He always believed something happened the night of my first trauma and thought there was more he could have done. Thank god he is gone now and never knew.

As for everyone else - case by case. I found the laws around disclosure for my locale and sort of let that be my guide for who needs to know.

I guess that's it really, who really needs to know?

So far it's those close to me, medical professionals, and medical technicians. Since the first trauma was in a hospital it's very stressing and triggering around anything medical. But as a plus I have had people like my dentist who surprised me when replacing fillings by telling his assistant that people with PTSD frequently pop fillings out during nightmares. More and more as I proclaim my PTSD to medical people I find they have a plan and are prepared to deal with me differently - even in a socialized medicine environment.

I haven't come to grips with general everyday life as yet. Between Covid and all that it hasn't come up too much. I guess it will be the minimum I have to legally disclose in all cases.