lonely

[yellow rose]

I wish I had more friendships in my life. I don't really have any friends to see. The only person I have is my sister who is like a friend. But my trauma issues and the symptoms of my mental illness make it extremely difficult to do things outside. I used to have a couple of friends both who I got emotional abuse off and one who i really cared about . I struggle so much sometmes with my issues that I sometimes just wish I had that friend someone else who was there for me and who cared. I also don;t even feel that I deserve a relationship either. Its hard when you are traumatised and mentally ill and you just cant reach those friendships or relationship that you feel you need. Everyone needs friends don't they. I have also tried making friends online but because of my issues aswell I sometimes find it difficult to trust and half the time feel they will just stop bothering with me because I dont feel good enough

 

[blackemerald1]

Holding onto ppl we value is hard work when we are well. It's even more so when we are not.

I think your self esteem has taken a hit @yellow rose - what makes you believe you are not good enough?

 

[yellow rose]

It definitely has. I have been through alot in my life since I was little and then other things as a adult.I have never felt good enough really. I am tryin to be more self loving at times. But there is always those underlying feeling of I am not enough , people will abandon me, people will stop bothering with me, sometimes I am right and sometimes I am actually wrong about that one. I guess there are many reasons. I have had alot of things that have knocked my confidence including chronic trauma, including abusive friendships, including things when I was little
I just see other people with all there friends and I wonder where mine either, even just to have one real genuine one online would be nice

 

[blackemerald1]

I think friendship is quite rare & very precious.

I am certain a lot of ppl over estimate how many friends they really have. You know the one's that can be counted on to stay with you when you really need them?

There are lots of ppl who are great to hang with when all is well. But they evaporate when the fun slows down.


What kind of friend are you? What can you offer to a friendship? Can you identify what makes you valuable? What do you think potential friends see when you speak?

Can you ask yourself these questions & answer them to yourself. (You don't have to answer here unless you want to)